Okay, I'll admit that I haven't laughed this hard at a film since I saw The Hangover last summer. Seriously, what was the plot here? I actually found the first film to be much better than this travesty. You can find my review of the first movie link. I'll go through it like I do with all movies. Pros and cons, then an overall.
Pros
The Volturi
Finally! Some ACTUAL vampires!! The Volturi I found were pretty awesome because, you know, they actually were cruel, soulless, mean, and did some actual VAMPIRING. The part towards the end where a tour group of humans is led directly to them and you hear their screams was pretty awesome. Come on people, that's what vampires do. They drink the blood of huuumans. Sheesh. Also, they were pretty cruel too, what with the whole smack down of Edward and nearly killing Bella (so bummed that didn't happen). Getting a small glimpse of the actor who will be playing Grindelwald in Deathly Hallows was a nice bonus too. So for all you Twilight fans, the Volturi are GOOD examples of vampires. Much like the soulless vampires on Buffy.
The Wolf Clan
Now why I didn't particularly enjoy the crappy computer animation of the wolves (more on that later) I did enjoy the characters of the wolf clan. The one scene that I really liked is where we see Sam's fiance, with half her face clawed up. My friend and I definitely agree that even with the claw marks she was amazingly beautiful. I would see a movie about her and Sam in a heartbeat. It would be much much better than this terrible film. Pity they were stuck in it.
Jacob
Lautner got hot. No denying that. Other than the hotness factor though, he was probably the only real character with any dimensions and depth besides Bella's father. The way their relationship built to where Jacob fell for Bella, and she pretty much for him, was very realistic and healthy. So you can imagine my dissappointment when she chose Edward, who abandoned, controlled, and basically led to much of her depression, over Jacob. You Team Jacob fans, I now consider you semi-sane because you recognized a HEALTHY relationship. Props to you guys.
Cons
Bella...you there?
I hate the character of Bella, I truly do. She doesn't think for herself, is defined solely by her relationships, and for some reason Stewart could NEVER SHUT HER MOUTH. Even when she wasn't talking!! What was up with that?! Gaah. The fact too that she dissed her friends at school and put her dad through so much crap with the screaming at night (seriously, wtf, she doesn't have PTSD) made me just loathe her character even more with a passion. Furthermore, her whole obsession over age was just ridiculous. Ohhh nooo you're a whole year older than your 107 year old vampire boyfriend!! Now he's not going to love you anymore!!! Yea, stupid. Those fans out there that idolize her, please find a healthier role model such as Eowyn, Hermione, heck even Lily on How I Met Your Mother. Bella is a very unhealthy and psychologically unstable character and is an insult to females everywhere. She didn't even drive her own car most of the time! Disgusting.
How is she special too btw?
If someone can explain how Bella is unaffected by any of the vampire's powers, it'd be much appreciated. That just seems like something that's just thrown out there. My theory? It's because Bella has no thoughts!
Edward...dude wtf?!
Sooo this guy that supposedly is totally in love with you throws you into a glass table for protection, lies to you, breaks up with you, and abandons you in the forest. A car ride home would have been nice plskthnx. Also, the throwing into the glass table for her protection? That was totally safe. You know, because she was bleeding even more profusely after the table than she was after the papercut. Also, who has ever bled that much after a papercut anyways, if at all? Furthermore, the fact that he kept "appearing" everytime Bella had an adrenaline rush was just weird. I think if my ex-boyfriend started showing up everytime I had a rush, I'd go and get a CT of my brain to make sure I didn't have a brain tumor a la Izzie seeing Denny b/c of her tumor. Also, the fact that Bella takes him right back after all the crap he put her through was just great. Really shows girls that hey, after a guy lies to you like that you can totally trust him again with no really good explanation other than "I love you". Nice.
OMG a Plot Point!!!
Annd what was the plot?? Everytime a possible plot point appeared it seemed to get derailed, such as the shots of Victoria, Laurent, or whenever anyone said Bella was acting crazy. If anyone spoke reason or a plot point appeared, it did not show again.
Lupin's Wolf Looked Better...
The film must have had the world's worst computer animation department because those wolves were a travesty. How about those transf...I mean FURSPLOSIONS eh? Really bad animation coupled with a laughable transformation sequence (FURSPLODE!) led to even more laughs. Too bad there weren't enough fursplosions.
That's What She Said!
There were way too many lines in the film where one could easily say that. For example- Bella: I'm coming! Me: That's what she said! Edward: I don't want you to come! Me: That's what HE said!! If you don't get the meaning behind that, then please go watch The Office where it is regularly utilized. Furthermore, the scene where Edward kisses Bella in front of her truck after the party was too funny. Edward acted like...well like link SNL skit. Please be forewarned that that link is meant for those 16 and older. That scene probably got one of the biggest laughs out of me.
Blocked
Finally, all the kiss-blocking that poor Jacob suffered through. Face Punch high school guy who threw up at an action movie (he's so gay then), Bella denies, and Edward calls just as he macks on the upper lip! Seriously, Jacob should have just pulled an Owen (Grey's Anatomy character), grabbed Bella, and just rocked her world. Doubt she woulda left if he did that.
Overall
Overall, this movie was a travesty to the film community. It was plotless, very poorly acted, and featured a very unhealthy set of characters that girls and women alike should not look up to as role models. Bella should have been thrown in a psych center for the stuff she was experiencing. I'm not going to apologize either if I've offended anyone. This is my honest opinion, and I know I wasn't as kind as I was in my first review. Now you've heard an opinion of an anti-Twilighter. You Team Jacobers, you got some respect from me now. Please save your brain cells and your money and do not see this movie. Unless you want a really good laugh then by all means do. Oh and one more thing to note. The ending with the whole Marry me? Ending on the *gasp* garnered a huge laugh from our audience. And just for my own satisfaction, FURSPLODE TIME!!
Pros
The Volturi
Finally! Some ACTUAL vampires!! The Volturi I found were pretty awesome because, you know, they actually were cruel, soulless, mean, and did some actual VAMPIRING. The part towards the end where a tour group of humans is led directly to them and you hear their screams was pretty awesome. Come on people, that's what vampires do. They drink the blood of huuumans. Sheesh. Also, they were pretty cruel too, what with the whole smack down of Edward and nearly killing Bella (so bummed that didn't happen). Getting a small glimpse of the actor who will be playing Grindelwald in Deathly Hallows was a nice bonus too. So for all you Twilight fans, the Volturi are GOOD examples of vampires. Much like the soulless vampires on Buffy.
The Wolf Clan
Now why I didn't particularly enjoy the crappy computer animation of the wolves (more on that later) I did enjoy the characters of the wolf clan. The one scene that I really liked is where we see Sam's fiance, with half her face clawed up. My friend and I definitely agree that even with the claw marks she was amazingly beautiful. I would see a movie about her and Sam in a heartbeat. It would be much much better than this terrible film. Pity they were stuck in it.
Jacob
Lautner got hot. No denying that. Other than the hotness factor though, he was probably the only real character with any dimensions and depth besides Bella's father. The way their relationship built to where Jacob fell for Bella, and she pretty much for him, was very realistic and healthy. So you can imagine my dissappointment when she chose Edward, who abandoned, controlled, and basically led to much of her depression, over Jacob. You Team Jacob fans, I now consider you semi-sane because you recognized a HEALTHY relationship. Props to you guys.
Cons
Bella...you there?
I hate the character of Bella, I truly do. She doesn't think for herself, is defined solely by her relationships, and for some reason Stewart could NEVER SHUT HER MOUTH. Even when she wasn't talking!! What was up with that?! Gaah. The fact too that she dissed her friends at school and put her dad through so much crap with the screaming at night (seriously, wtf, she doesn't have PTSD) made me just loathe her character even more with a passion. Furthermore, her whole obsession over age was just ridiculous. Ohhh nooo you're a whole year older than your 107 year old vampire boyfriend!! Now he's not going to love you anymore!!! Yea, stupid. Those fans out there that idolize her, please find a healthier role model such as Eowyn, Hermione, heck even Lily on How I Met Your Mother. Bella is a very unhealthy and psychologically unstable character and is an insult to females everywhere. She didn't even drive her own car most of the time! Disgusting.
How is she special too btw?
If someone can explain how Bella is unaffected by any of the vampire's powers, it'd be much appreciated. That just seems like something that's just thrown out there. My theory? It's because Bella has no thoughts!
Edward...dude wtf?!
Sooo this guy that supposedly is totally in love with you throws you into a glass table for protection, lies to you, breaks up with you, and abandons you in the forest. A car ride home would have been nice plskthnx. Also, the throwing into the glass table for her protection? That was totally safe. You know, because she was bleeding even more profusely after the table than she was after the papercut. Also, who has ever bled that much after a papercut anyways, if at all? Furthermore, the fact that he kept "appearing" everytime Bella had an adrenaline rush was just weird. I think if my ex-boyfriend started showing up everytime I had a rush, I'd go and get a CT of my brain to make sure I didn't have a brain tumor a la Izzie seeing Denny b/c of her tumor. Also, the fact that Bella takes him right back after all the crap he put her through was just great. Really shows girls that hey, after a guy lies to you like that you can totally trust him again with no really good explanation other than "I love you". Nice.
OMG a Plot Point!!!
Annd what was the plot?? Everytime a possible plot point appeared it seemed to get derailed, such as the shots of Victoria, Laurent, or whenever anyone said Bella was acting crazy. If anyone spoke reason or a plot point appeared, it did not show again.
Lupin's Wolf Looked Better...
The film must have had the world's worst computer animation department because those wolves were a travesty. How about those transf...I mean FURSPLOSIONS eh? Really bad animation coupled with a laughable transformation sequence (FURSPLODE!) led to even more laughs. Too bad there weren't enough fursplosions.
That's What She Said!
There were way too many lines in the film where one could easily say that. For example- Bella: I'm coming! Me: That's what she said! Edward: I don't want you to come! Me: That's what HE said!! If you don't get the meaning behind that, then please go watch The Office where it is regularly utilized. Furthermore, the scene where Edward kisses Bella in front of her truck after the party was too funny. Edward acted like...well like link SNL skit. Please be forewarned that that link is meant for those 16 and older. That scene probably got one of the biggest laughs out of me.
Blocked
Finally, all the kiss-blocking that poor Jacob suffered through. Face Punch high school guy who threw up at an action movie (he's so gay then), Bella denies, and Edward calls just as he macks on the upper lip! Seriously, Jacob should have just pulled an Owen (Grey's Anatomy character), grabbed Bella, and just rocked her world. Doubt she woulda left if he did that.
Overall
Overall, this movie was a travesty to the film community. It was plotless, very poorly acted, and featured a very unhealthy set of characters that girls and women alike should not look up to as role models. Bella should have been thrown in a psych center for the stuff she was experiencing. I'm not going to apologize either if I've offended anyone. This is my honest opinion, and I know I wasn't as kind as I was in my first review. Now you've heard an opinion of an anti-Twilighter. You Team Jacobers, you got some respect from me now. Please save your brain cells and your money and do not see this movie. Unless you want a really good laugh then by all means do. Oh and one more thing to note. The ending with the whole Marry me? Ending on the *gasp* garnered a huge laugh from our audience. And just for my own satisfaction, FURSPLODE TIME!!
Summary: Edward reminisces about his 'lost' first love.
I really hope some will give it a read, and please leave me a review if you're on FF. Or you can leave a comment here and tell me what you think! :-)
Link---> link
Those Girls That Drink...While They Write is a new blog that was just created today designed to receive and give Fic recommendations. Teasers, pics, and outtakes will be shown from the Administrators stories as well. Anyone can send us a recommendation and we will be glad to post it. We invite any authors to come by and interact and meet new people to exchange reviews with.
Disclaimer: We do not actually drink excessively while we write. But if the title gets your attention, then our work is done.:-)
We'd love for you to join!
LINK---> link
Disclaimer: We do not actually drink excessively while we write. But if the title gets your attention, then our work is done.:-)
We'd love for you to join!
LINK---> link
I was just wondering what the official name for people who crave vamps and werewolfs etc.
i ve heard of twihards and fanpires but are there at least any original classifications. If Im going to be a mega fan shouldnt i have a beter way of calling my self a super fan
I ve sort of came up with a few that i think have potential . .
1.twissessed(twilight, obssessed)
2.vampchaser
3.twiniacas(twilight,maniacs)
4.twifreak
5.vamphunter
6.twicrazed
7.twimazed(twilight,amazed)
8.Edlover(Edward lover)
9.wolfhugger
10.twipeople
Which classificaton do you think makes at least the most sense?????!!!!!!
i ve heard of twihards and fanpires but are there at least any original classifications. If Im going to be a mega fan shouldnt i have a beter way of calling my self a super fan
I ve sort of came up with a few that i think have potential . .
1.twissessed(twilight, obssessed)
2.vampchaser
3.twiniacas(twilight,maniacs)
4.twifreak
5.vamphunter
6.twicrazed
7.twimazed(twilight,amazed)
8.Edlover(Edward lover)
9.wolfhugger
10.twipeople
Which classificaton do you think makes at least the most sense?????!!!!!!
We were together, meant forever
I thought so
Till Jasper came after me
And Edward thought oh no
So the Cullens had to leave
And I was so down
But that's when Jacob came in
And things turned around
I became reckless
Just to hear Edward's voice
I was so out of it
I didn't have a choice
Me and Jacob were friends
Till we didn't talk for a while
Then he told me his secret
As before, I wasn't scared by a mile
Edward thought I was dead
So he went to the Volturi
But then he changed his mind
Once he finally saw me
So when we got back home
To have Edward, I was happy
I wished to be like the Cullens
But then he wanted to stop me
He said I could
But 1 condition he carried
He said he'd do it
But only if we got married
I thought so
Till Jasper came after me
And Edward thought oh no
So the Cullens had to leave
And I was so down
But that's when Jacob came in
And things turned around
I became reckless
Just to hear Edward's voice
I was so out of it
I didn't have a choice
Me and Jacob were friends
Till we didn't talk for a while
Then he told me his secret
As before, I wasn't scared by a mile
Edward thought I was dead
So he went to the Volturi
But then he changed his mind
Once he finally saw me
So when we got back home
To have Edward, I was happy
I wished to be like the Cullens
But then he wanted to stop me
He said I could
But 1 condition he carried
He said he'd do it
But only if we got married
When we first met
And I first looked in your eyes
I couldn't help myself
I was hypnotized
And then I found out
Your one big secret
I was in danger
But I wasn't scared a bit
So then you took me
To your special hideaway
So you could show me what you're like
In the light of day
My heart was racing
I was falling for you
My only question was
Do you feel this way too
Then one day
My blood was wanted
It hurt so bad
I thought I was dead
Then he saved me
And I got my answer
I does feel the same way
So now it's forever <3
And I first looked in your eyes
I couldn't help myself
I was hypnotized
And then I found out
Your one big secret
I was in danger
But I wasn't scared a bit
So then you took me
To your special hideaway
So you could show me what you're like
In the light of day
My heart was racing
I was falling for you
My only question was
Do you feel this way too
Then one day
My blood was wanted
It hurt so bad
I thought I was dead
Then he saved me
And I got my answer
I does feel the same way
So now it's forever <3
two weeks befor he visit
All I could think about was visiting my dad. His name is Charlie. I hadn't visted him in over three years. I would visit him for the whole summer scince I was little. Until I was old enough to make my own decisions, I was about fourteen and a half whe I stoped visiting. Im seventeen now. I live with my mom and her fiance. Her fiance's name is Phil.
I planned on visiting Charlie in two weeks. He was so happy when I phoned him, he said he bought me a present for when I come over. To be honest I was a little worried about what it was. But I kept my head held high, maybe he got me a neclace with earings and a bracelet too. I couldn't wait to see what the 'presnt' is.
All I could think about was visiting my dad. His name is Charlie. I hadn't visted him in over three years. I would visit him for the whole summer scince I was little. Until I was old enough to make my own decisions, I was about fourteen and a half whe I stoped visiting. Im seventeen now. I live with my mom and her fiance. Her fiance's name is Phil.
I planned on visiting Charlie in two weeks. He was so happy when I phoned him, he said he bought me a present for when I come over. To be honest I was a little worried about what it was. But I kept my head held high, maybe he got me a neclace with earings and a bracelet too. I couldn't wait to see what the 'presnt' is.