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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Running from Chicacolt to San Franciscolt is a railroad called the Union Pacific. It's the largest railroad in the United States, and is run by thousands of ponies. This is the story of some of those ponies that run the rails, aka railroading.

Episode 5: War pony

May 15, 1951

The korean war has been going on for months. Everypony on the Union Pacific was doing their best to deliver supplies to Las Pegasus for use in the U.S military.

Gordon: *doing yard work*
Pete: Gordon, I have something for you to do.
Gordon: Great! I'm doing a lot of that here.
Pete: I want you to go to Las Pegasus.
Gordon: Cool. What am I going to do?
Pete: You no longer have to work in the yards, but get to drive a train.
Gordon: Swee-- I don't have to work with Hawkeye, right?
Pete: Nope. You gotta work with.....
Gordon: (Please say Honey, please say Honey.)
Pete: Coffee Creme.
Gordon: (Shit) *smiles* Great. I'll get to work right away.

After his fake smile toward Pete, Gordon went to the servicing facility to get his engine for the train. He would be driving a 4-6-6-4 Challenger. A smaller version of the bigboy.

Jeff: Good morning Gordon.
Gordon: Where's Percy?
Jeff: He's fixing track. But don't you know not to switch jobs without permission from the boss?
Gordon: Aha, aha, that was nearly a year ago.
Jeff: You did get permission, right?
Gordon: Yeah! And I don't need your fat ass telling me what to do!
Jeff: You say that, but it doesn't mean it's true. You're the fattest worker here in the U.P.
Gordon: Wow, way to offend me loser. *drives engine*

Gordon then drove his engine onto another track, where he would couple his engine to the train. 75 cars were in the train, and it was all going to L.P.

Gordon: *stops engine*
Coffee Creme: A little closer.
Gordon: ugh *backs up*
Coffee Creme: Perfect. *goes to air brakes*
Gordon: Let's go! Hurry up.
Coffee Creme: *connecting air brakes*
Gordon: *blows whistle*

Meanwhile, up in the signalbox

Snowflake: Hmm, that train must be ready. *turns signal green*
Gordon: *accelerates*
Coffee Creme: WAit!! *finishes connecting air brakes*

Unfortunately Coffee Creme was standing on the couplers while the train was in motion.

Gordon: Let's make this bitch go faster *accelerates to 35*
Coffee Creme: *climbing to top of tender*
Gordon: *sees Coffee Creme* What the fuck is she doing?
Coffee Creme: *runs toward cab*
Gordon: A red signal?! Ahhh, forget it. *drives faster*
Coffee Creme: Oh shit *nearly hits her head on signal, then gets in cab*
Gordon: Where the hell have you been?
Coffee Creme: At the back of the locomotive you careless nincompoop.
Gordon: Fuck you.
Coffee Creme: *grabs shovel* Where's the coal?
Gordon: This engine uses oil, we don't have coal.
Coffee Creme: So, how does the oil get into the firebox?
Gordon: Automatically. All you have to do, is check our fuel, look out the other side of the window, and tell me something important. If it's not important, I'll ignore you.
Coffee Creme: Yeah, I'll let you know, and call the news reporters.
Gordon: So funny I forgot to laugh.
Coffee Creme: There's a train in our way.
Gordon: *slows down* I think we might crash.
Coffee Creme: You shouldn't have passed that red signal.
Gordon: That's not important *going 15*
Coffee Creme: We're going to hit it!
Gordon: *cover eyes*
Coffee Creme: *prepares to jump*

But before Coffee Creme jumped, Gordon's train stopped. It was literally half of a centimeter close to the other train.

Coffee Creme: What happened?
Gordon: I don't know, but it's completely unacceptable. Stay here, I'll be back.
Coffee Creme: I wanna go with you.
Gordon: Stay here!! I'll be back!
Coffee Creme: *sits in chair*
Gordon; *walks to other engine* It's so hot. *turns around*
Coffee Creme: *waiting*
Gordon: *comes back* Fuck it, you go find out what's happening.
Coffee Creme: Me?
Gordon: No, Harry Trumare. Yes you, go!
Coffee Creme: *climbs out of cab*
Gordon: *grabs shovel* Take this with you *throws it at Coffee Creme*
Coffee Creme: *grabs shovel*

Shortly after that, the train in front of Gordon started to move. Once it did, Percy drove up to them in a truck.

Coffee Creme: Hi Percy.
Percy: What's up Coffee? I just wanted you to know there was a derailment because of the track's condition. You'll have to wait for me to fix it, and then you can go.
Gordon: What did he say?
Coffee Creme: We have to wait for the tracks to be fixed.
Gordon: Nope. There has to be another way to get to Las Pegasus.
Percy: There isn't unless you want to travel backwards for twenty miles.
Gordon: It'll be quicker than waiting for you to fix the tracks. Get in Coffee Creme.
Coffee Creme: *gets in cab*
Gordon: *driving backwards*
Coffee Creme: How are we going to see which way we're going?
Gordon: When a train crashes into us, then we'll know.
Coffee Creme: Great.
Gordon: Oh, shut up. You got a better idea?
Coffee Creme: Oui. We put the engine on the other side, and we know which way we're going.
Gordon: Nope. That takes too long.

Eventually they were going 70 miles an hour. They would reach the alternate route in no more than 15 minutes.

Coffee Creme: I'm surprised we haven't crashed yet.
Gordon: We're not going to.
Coffee Creme: I think we should just go forward. The tracks are probably fixed now.
Gordon: No, they're not. As a matter of fact, we had to wait for them to fix the track.
Coffee Creme: Still, could be worse.

Suddenly, the sound of a crashing train could be heard. Orion crashed into the back of Gordon's train.

(Everybody, say it with me)

Luckily, no one was hurt.

Except for the millions of passengers that probably just died on Orion's passenger train. Luckily, no one important was hurt.

Gordon ran surprisingly fast to the end of the train, and was getting prepared to use a spell that would get the derailed cars back onto the tracks.

Gordon: *panting* I have to make it. *nearly trips* I'm so close to the end. *lays on ground*

Gordon stopped, after only moving an inch, running alongside a train that was one mile long.

Coffee Creme: *teleports to end of train*
Gordon: No, no, no! Don't tell Orion anything!! *runs again* Damnit, I'm getting tired. *falls on ground*
Orion: He can't run for shit.
Coffee Creme: Really? Whatever, let's just get our trains back on the tracks, and repair the engines.
Orion: How are we going to do that?
Coffee Creme: *shows horn*
Orion: Oh yeah. Well, I'm a pegasus, so I can't do anything.
Coffee Creme: You don't have to. Just keep your mouth shut about this.
Gordon: *shows up* Don't tell him anything!!
Coffee Creme: Did you hear what I said? I told him to keep his mouth shut.
Gordon: Oh, yeah. I remeber now.
Orion: It's pronounced, re mem ber.
Gordon: Whatever *repairs engine*
Coffee Creme: *repairs freight cars*
Gordon: Ok. Now to check your rolling stock.
Coffee Creme: His passenger cars seem fine.
Gordon: It's called rolling stock.
Orion: Not always. Well, you two did a great job. Better hurry, before we get late.
Gordon: Yeah, you're right. *teleports to engine*
Coffee Creme: *teleports to engine* So, have you learned from your mistakes?
Gordon: What's a mistake?
Coffee Creme: (Why do I even try being nice to him?)
Gordon: *drives train* It was Orion who hit us. He saw us after all, why didn't he stop?
Coffee Creme: Whatever you say.

150 minutes later, Gordon got the war equipment to Las Pegasus.

Sargent: About time. What the fuck took you guys so long?
Gordon: A bunch of idiots got in our way, and derailed our train.
Sargent: None of this stuff better be damaged.
Gordon: It's not, but if it was, I'd fix it.
Sargent: *sees damaged jeeps* Would you now?

And so, Gordon spent two hours helping the military repair jeeps. Then he went back to Cheyenne.

Pete: Well, I heard of an epic screw up you caused with Orion's passenger train today.
Gordon: (Fuck!)
Pete: But I heard you did a very good job fixing the damage caused by the train wreck.
Gordon: (Say what?) Thanks.
Pete: As a reward, I'm giving you the entire week off.
Gordon: Thank you sir.
Pete: Starting now.
Gordon: Yahoo! *runs away* I'm going to a beach alongside Neigh Jersey. See you ponies in one week!!

The end

On the next episode of Ponies On The Rails

Percy, and Jeff get some of the spotlight. In other words, they're getting their own episode

Copyright, 2013
Robotnik: Pingas!
Robotnik: Pingas!
posted by Seanthehedgehog
Princess Celestia

Starring Celestia, Luna, Twilight, and Derpy as theirselves
Blaze as Jonathan (For this skit, he's bald.)
Cosmic Rainbow as Chrysler (For this skit, he has a mustache.)
Mortomis as Bryan
Saten Twist as Timothy
Double Scoop as Skeletor
Master Sword as Harry
Sophie Shimmer as Alexis
Astrel Sky as Jenny

Derpy entered Celestia's office.

Derpy: It appears Twilight is up to her tricks again. What are your thoughts?
Celestia: I thought we were finally done with this nonsense. But I guess not. I was having a nice rest, now this! God only knows what kind of shenanigans she has in store...
continue reading...
Theme song >>>> link

Taxi Ponies: *Driving taxi cabs to the station*

Ponies On The Rails

Starring the Union Pacific ponies

Pierce Hawkins "Hawkeye" From Seanthehedgehog

Snowflake & Orion From Alinah09

Metal Gloss From DragonAura15

Railway Pony: *Driving freight train across a bridge going over the train tracks at the station.*
Metal Gloss: *Drives freight train under bridge*
Pony: *In the station, buying a ticket. As soon as he gets the ticket, he runs across the platform, and boards his train.*
Hawkeye: *Preparing train for departure*
Stylo: *Looking at orders on paper*
Hawkeye:...
continue reading...
#4: MISTREATMENT OF TRIXIE:
This isn't like last time, were the ONLY reason I am sticking up for Trixie, is because she's just so adorable to look at.
No, no, this time I am NOT denying that Trixie was quite annoying.
That she was stubborn and over confident in herself.
And that she lied to an entire town, just for the attention.
And she did indeed deserve to be punished for her lies and rudeness.
But come on..
Did she really deserve to be shunned and mocked by all of Equestria, and lose her job as a magician and work as a rock farmer..

#3: MISTREATMENT OF IRON WILL:
Most fans label Iron Will as a...
continue reading...
posted by Canada24
#5: TWILIGHT SEGA:
Frankly, I don't think ANYBODY watches this series.
Or 50 shades of grey for that matter.
But I'm putting them both on the list anyway..

#4: 50 SHADES OF GREY:

#3: SCREAM SERIES:
A parody of the horror genre.
But the first movie would of been actually scary, if they actually bothered to have decent actors.
And to not have a villain, who's about as frightening as tampon commercials..

#2: EQUESTRIA GIRLS:
It's not that it's a BAD movie.
It's probably a great movie.
But something about the characters becoming humanised, it kinda creeps me out..

#1: FROZEN:
I know what you gonna say.
You...
continue reading...
posted by Canada24
AJ: She left us!?

Pinkamena: That's what Twiliy said... Claimed that being princess means you guys are no longer good enough for her... (conveniently) Except me. She still likes me..

Rarity: What about Flutterhy!? She's missing as well..

Pinamena: Oh.. Well.. (nervously) I wouldn't know anything about that.

ONE WEEK EARLIER:

Pinkamena: Wakey. Wakey. Fluttershy..

Fluttershy: (wakes up only to discover she's tied up. And sees. Much to her horror. A huge saw like device above her head, same one from CUPCAKES - GET READY TO DIE) P- Please let me go!

Pinkamena: Can't.. Your on the list.. And my customers...
continue reading...
posted by Seanthehedgehog
Theme song >>>> link

Taxi Ponies: *Driving taxi cabs to the station*

Ponies On The Rails

Starring the Union Pacific ponies

Pierce Hawkins "Hawkeye" From Seanthehedgehog

Snowflake & Orion From Alinah09

Metal Gloss From DragonAura15

Railway Pony: *Driving freight train across a bridge going over the train tracks at the station.*
Metal Gloss: *Drives freight train under bridge*
Pony: *In the station, buying a ticket. As soon as he gets the ticket, he runs across the platform, and boards his train.*
Hawkeye: *Preparing train for departure*
Stylo: *Looking at orders on paper*
Hawkeye:...
continue reading...
posted by Seanthehedgehog
Theme song >>>> link

Taxi Ponies: *Driving taxi cabs to the station*

Ponies On The Rails

Starring the Union Pacific ponies

Pierce Hawkins "Hawkeye" From Seanthehedgehog

Snowflake & Orion From Alinah09

Metal Gloss From DragonAura15

Railway Pony: *Driving freight train across a bridge going over the train tracks at the station.*
Metal Gloss: *Drives freight train under bridge*
Pony: *In the station, buying a ticket. As soon as he gets the ticket, he runs across the platform, and boards his train.*
Hawkeye: *Preparing train for departure*
Stylo: *Looking at orders on paper*
Hawkeye:...
continue reading...
added by NocturnalMirage
Source: EQD, joyreactor, facebook
Rarity after spilling mud on AppleJack's dress and finlky snapped out her attempts of impressing Trenderhoof by behaving like AppleaJack.

This got even worse for Rarity when she realised it was actually Rarity's own dress, and ran to clean it.

Saten awkwardly approached AppleJack. "That's uhh.. A lovely outfit" Saten said nervously.

"Well.. Thanks. I was only wearing it to snap Rarity out of annoying state.. It's kinda itchy actually" AppleJack insisted.

"Oh.. Well.. Dose this mean Trenderhoof will leave you alone?" Saten asked.

"Ah guess.. But ah'm glad you to know you actually 'do' care for me" AppleJack admitted.

"I guess" Saten said a bit awkwardly.

"... Say. You wanna get some lunch together?" AppleJack asked.

"Of coarse" Saten said excitedly.

AppleJack smiled, rather cutely.



Well. I know this sucked. But just needed to end the story.

So..

END OF EPISODE ONE..
Ever since one of my favorite episodes of Season 4 came out, which was Flight To The Finish, only one thing has crossed my mind: Scootaloo needs to fucking fly. Diamond Tiara went ableism on Scootaloo, amd that drove me over the edge. My instinct after the episode? Time to win some races! I ended up winning about 900, all told, from the end of that episode until today. I then retroactively added all other racing game wins I accrued, making my total more like 4,200. Add my sports game wins, and you're looking at 4,550. Add the rest of my wins in games that count them, and now you have a total...
continue reading...
Episode 10: Quicksilver

Me: *Reading X-Men #4 in a small park near Cloudsdale*

Scootaloo: *Approaches me* Hello Nick,

Me: Hello Scootaloo. How are you?

Scootaloo: Good, I guess. Can I ask you something?

Me: Sure.

Scootaloo: My friends Applebloom and Sweetie Belle both look up to superheroes, like Captain Marvel and Spider Man, but now I don’t have one. Can you find me a hero who is fast and cool at the same time?

Me: Well, the first one that comes to mind is the mutant Quicksilver.

Scootaloo: Quicksilver?

Me: Quicksilver, aka Pietro Maximoff, is the twin brother of Scarlet Witch. He has super speed...
continue reading...
added by NocturnalMirage
Source: EQD, joyreactor
Episode 4: Thor Odinson

Me: *Reading Journey Into Mystery #83* in the park*

Rarity: *Sees what I'm reading* Who is that man in the book? And why does he look like such a hunk?

Me: Oh, his name is Thor.

Rarity: Thor?

Me: Thor is an Asgardian, sent to Earth by his father, Odin, to learn humility. He had a human identity named Donald Blake.

Rarity: Donald Blake? How drab...

Me: Anyways, Thor had been going on many adventures, such as the Destroyer, an enchanted suit of armor made by Odin, but stolen by Loki in Journey Into Mystery #118.

Rarity: Loki?

Me: Loki is Thor's evil brother.

Rarity: Oh.

Me: Thor...
continue reading...
Alright..

So I found this bizarre MLP story.
That ruins some of my favorite character Twilight and AppleJack, by using the theme of INCEST..

Fuckin incest! Why dose that even excist!?

I thought I stopped having to deal with fuckin incest after no longer reading Alpha & Omega stories.

But nope.
Even my little pony has it.
Just ask Friendship is Witchcraft.

This story is about Twilight and AppleJack switching minds, so I guess in a way it's not incest, but, my mind will forever KNOW it is.

Anyway..

don't EVER read this story.
But if you really have to,
Afried your on your own for finding it..
Trenderhoof was still following AppleJack all over town, trying to impress her, and obvilious of her complete lack of interested in him.

At one point Saten Twist appeared literary out of nowhere, while wearing in usual outfit.

"Saten? What do y'all want now?" AppleJack groaned to the red Pegasus.

"Jee.. Good seeing you to Jacky" Saten said with clear sarcasm.

"Ah thought ah told ya ta stop calling me that" AppleJack groaned.

"You did, but I can't help, it sounds so cute.. (somewhat pervertly) Just like you" Saten replied, to the beautifully orange, southern pony.

"Please Saten.. I had a long day....
continue reading...
posted by Seanthehedgehog
Theme song >>>> link

SeanTheHedgehog Presents

Ponies On The Rails

Starring the Union Pacific ponies

Pierce Hawkins "Hawkeye" From Seanthehedgehog

Snowflake & Orion From Alinah09

Metal Gloss From DragonAura15

Stylo From Jimmythedragon

NocturnalMirage from NochurnalMirage

Gordon, Percy, Jeff, Wilson, Ike, Nicole, Mike, and Pete from Seanthehedgehog

Also starring the Southern Pacific ponies.

Nikki West From Jade_23

Michael, Roger, Anthony, Ryan, Duke, and Donut from Seanthehedgehog

Special guest star Stephanie from SeanTheHedgehog

Episode 75: Enjoy Your Visit
Date: August 7, 1958...
continue reading...
posted by PeacefulCritic
To be honest, It's almost Christmas and I haven't done anything for that Holiday. Just because I'm working on a new review series that wouldn't be finished until after New years. There's obviously something wrong with that. So, out of guilt I'm giving you my review on "Snowdrop".Ah, yes the infamous and Famous "Snowdrop" from "SillyFillyStudios". This piece of Fan made episode left a big impact on more then just 400 of us.

Why's that exactly well, for that we have to look into the main character herself Snowdrop. She's pretty likable. She has a personality,development and a lot, a lot of sympathy,...
continue reading...
posted by TotalDramaFan60
TotalDramaFan60 presents:
Gummy's Yummy Christmas.
It was the night before Hearth's Warming at the Breakfast household.
Gummy Bear wanted to stay up late.
"You can't stay up, our Little Gummy Bear." Mother and Father told.
But Gummy didn't listen, so she probably met her fate.

Gummy crept down the stairs to watch Matt Groening cartoons.
Even though she TOO D-
Even though she was not told to.
Gummy got out the popcorn.
Got out the pop.
She turned the TV on and...well, pop.

Poor Gummy forgot to turn off the microwave
She forgot to get the popcorn!
It caught fire!
Gummy screamed!
And down came Mother and Father!

"Oh, Mother, oh, Father." Gummy pleaded.
"I really didn't mean too,
"It was just an accident."
Maple and Buttered looked at each other.
"It's just a little dent!"

Though Gummy did not see Santa that day,
She got many Hearth's Warming presents.
Teddy bears, lollipops...
And an amazing pile of...




Marshmallows.
Happy Hearth's Warming!
added by Seanthehedgehog
Source: me
posted by Seanthehedgehog
Nancy
Nancy
Theme song >>>> link

Seanthehedgehog presents

Ponies On The Rails

Starring the Union Pacific ponies

Pierce Hawkins "Hawkeye" From Seanthehedgehog

Snowflake & Orion From Alinah09

Metal Gloss From DragonAura15

Stylo From Jimmythedragon

NocturnalMirage from NochurnalMirage

Gordon, Percy, Jeff, Wilson, Ike and Pete from Seanthehedgehog

Also starring the Southern Pacific ponies.

Nikki West From Jade_23

Michael, Roger, Anthony, Ryan, Duke, and Donut from Seanthehedgehog

Episode 72: Work Before Pleasure
Date: July 27, 1958
Location: Ogden Utah
Time: 7:04 AM
Railroad: Southern Pacific...
continue reading...