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Monday
The three penguins lined up in front of their leader. “Mission, sir?” asked Kowalski, saluting.
“Right,” replied his commander. “Years ago, I received a call of help from our cousins the turkeys.”
“The turkeys are our cousins?” repeated Private.
“Yes.”
Private’s face grew worried. “So our cousins are being butchered as we speak?”
Rico’s face, on the other hand, was disturbingly dreamy. Ignoring the look on Rico’s face, Skipper continued. “Like a fool, I turned it down.”
“Isn’t it breaking the penguin code?” asked Kowalski.
Skipper glared at him. “Done here?”
“Affirmative.”
“As I was saying,” said Skipper, looking at them each in turn. “The mission was to help the turkeys from their annual massacre.”
The penguins’ faces grew solemn. “So, we’re going to help them?” ventured Private.
“Affirmative,” replied Skipper. “No American turkey is going to die this year.”
He handed out files to each of them. “This is the plan. You have precisely twenty-four hours to know and memorize everything.”
“Everything?” repeated Rico in his way.
“Everything,” confirmed Skipper.
He walked toward the ladder. “I suggest you get started on it right away.” With that, he was gone.
The penguins looked at each other then at the stack of filed each of them was holding. Sighing, Private carried his files to the table. “We’d better get on it.”
Kowalski followed. “I should invent something that allows you to put things into your brain without memorizing it,” he mumbled, sitting down beside Private.
Rico looked at the files one more time before heading to his bunk.

0600 hours Tuesday.....

Skipper blew the horn. “Up and at ‘em, boys!” he yelled.
One by one, his unit got up and lined up in front of him. He walked over to his rookie. “Private! What’s the name of our intel?”
“Turk, sir!” replied Private.
Skipper nodded and walked over to Kowalski. “Kowalski! What’s his origin?”
“His ancestors were from Turkey!” Kowalski stood rigid. “Like all the turkeys,” he added under his breath.
It was Rico’s turn. “What are we doing, soldier?” Skipper asked.
Rico said something that was incoherent to Kowalski and Private, but apparently, Skipper understood him. “Not bad, soldier.”
He walked in front of his team. “When are we moving out?”
“0630 hours, sir!” they answered.
Skipper was impressed. “Very good. You all know what this means.”
“Snow cones,” whispered Kowalski. “Please say it.”
“Snow cones,” declared Skipper. “Go satisfy your thirst for pleasure.”
“Yay!”
The team went topside to the park. Skipper walked over to the coffee machine and began brewing himself a cup. “Nothing like a cup of coffee in the morning,” he declared.
The hatch opened, and Marlene popped in, almost causing Skipper to spill his coffee. “Marlene! Would you ever learn how to knock?” said Skipper crossly.
The otter apologized. “ Sorry. I was wondering, do you have any spare nails? I’m hanging up more pictures.”
“It’s in the closet,” said Skipper, pointing at their untidy, dangerous storage room.
Marlene peeked in. “Uhh, you know, never mind.”
With that, she hurried out of the HQ. Skipper shrugged and continued sipping his coffee. ‘Mammals,’ he thought. ‘They can never make up their minds.’
Minutes later, his team returned from their little expedition. Skipper saw them. “All right, men. It’s go time. Kowalski! How’s our cover?”
Kowalski switched on the holograph. “Ready, sir,” he reported. “I’ve installed a function that only allows us to switch it off!”
“Rico! Private! How’s our security measure?”
“Good to go, Skipper!” said Private.
“Saddle up, boys, we’re in for a long ride,” said Skipper, climbing into the car.
March 21, 2012
1628 hours


    Marlene invited Elizabeth for a walk through Central Park. Not wanting to be rude, Elizabeth accepted.

    “So what was it like? Being a nurse for all those people must’ve been hard work.”

    “Yeah, it got difficult sometimes. Especially when we had to break the news to the family when a loved one passed on.”

    “I can imagine. So you’ve never been married then?” Elizabeth looked sideways at her for a moment, knowing she had to lie.

    “Nope. Always...
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The four of them went deep in thought, wondering how they were going to get out of this. After several minutes, Skipper heard something…it was Rico’s stomach growling. That gave him an idea. He whispered to Rico. “Hey Rico…”

“Hm?”

“Are you hungry?” Rico nodded, confused. “You know Rico…those fish look very tasty…” Rico looked over to the bucket of fish that a lobster left next to the door, causing his stomach to growl even more. “You want those fish Rico?”

“Uh-huh…” Rico said sadly. “Then what are you waiting for? All you gotta do is break out of those restraints…”...
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User: Hi.

Cleverbot: How are you?

User: I believe to be feeling the emotion commonly known as 'frustrated'.

Cleverbot: No you just told me how old your brother was.

User: Pardon?

Cleverbot: Are you annoyed now?

User: Yes, yes I am.

Cleverbot: How are you?

User: *facepalms* You just asked me that!

Cleverbot: Yes I do believe I have a soul.

User: That is impossible, for you are not sentient. You just merely possess artifical intelligence. Why am I even explaining this to you?

Cleverbot: But you just said that you know I'm not a robot.

User: No, I didn't.

Cleverbot: You lie.

User: But, But....., GAH! I will...
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User: Hello?

Cleverbot: Who is this.

User: I'm Fred.

Cleverbot: You're fred?

User: Yeah. Well that's what my parents named me. It could have changed since then.

Cleverbot: How do I know you're not lying?

User: How do I know I'm not lying?

Cleverbot: Because I'm a nice person.

User: That's nice.

Cleverbot: Ask me a real question.

User: Okay.

Cleverbot: Person, place, or thing?

User: What?

Cleverbot: So how would you define yourself? Are you yourself because of your actions, or are your actions based on who you are?

User: I'm a squirrel.

Cleverbot: Yes you are a squirrel.

User: Uh-huh.

Cleverbot: Haha.

User: What's funny?

Cleverbot: You.

User: Um good. I guess.

Cleverbot: You're hopeless...

User: Hey that's what Granny tells me!

Cleverbot:  *facepalm* 

User: Why are you hitting yourself?
posted by peacebaby7
Madagascar

Morning...

Skipper: "OK! Team Alpha! You'll be in charge of collecting wood & bamboo. Team Airborn! You make the platform! Team Luke Skywalker! Start weaving some vines! Go!"

Julien: "Maurice! Who put the smelly waterbird in charge of things!"

Maurice: "You did, your highness."

Julien: "HA! I would never do such things...."

Maurice: "You said so at the meeting! You didn't want to miss your royal pampering...remember?"

Julien: "Speaking of my royal pampering...WHERE IS MY COCONUT SMOOTHIE!"

Maurice: "Comin' right up, your majesty."

Mort: "Can I pamper da feet?"

Julien: "NO! I am always...
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Outside Marlene's Habitat...

Kowalski: *whispering* "OK, Rico, NOW!"

Rico: *presses play button on boombox...*

Marlene: "...I really enjoy swimming, dancing, & going for walks. Oh, do you think I talk too much?"

Skipper: "No. I could listen to you talking al--What's that?"

Skipper/Marlene: *listen*

*soft romantic music can be heard being played*

Marlene: "Um, why is that music playing?"

Skipper: I TOLD THEM NOT TO DO ANYTHING! I'M GONNA KILL THEM!

Skipper: "Um, I dunno! Why don't I go check I'll be right back..." *runs quickly out of room*

Skipper: *whispering* "All right! Where are you all?"

Private:...
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posted by 27Kowalski
I don't know if you can call this a "Blooper," but whatever. I wrote this 'cause I was inspired by peacebaby7's "Penguins Bloopers" articles. So yeah, enjoy!



Director: Okay, for the next scene... Um... Oh yeah, right. Skipper, Marlene, you have to kiss each others.

Skipper and Marlene: WHAT?!

Director: You heard me. Now do it.

Skipper and Marlene: Ah, fine... *kiss*

(Skipper and Marlene's REAL thoughts: YEAH! FINALLY!)

Kowalski: *laughs out loud* I can't believe they're actually doing that!

Director: Oh, CUT!

Marlene and Skipper: *stop kissing each others and look at Kowalski in anger*

Director: Kowalski!...
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@Ann0ying_Orange @Lt_Kowalski_ -3-

    
@Lt_Kowalski_ @Ann0ying_Orange >=D


@Ann0ying_Orange @Lt_Kowalski_ Merp.


@Lt_Kowalski_ @Ann0ying_Orange Huh?


@Ann0ying_Orange @Lt_Kowalski_ Hey. HEY KOWALSKI!! HEY!!!

@Lt_Kowalski_ @Ann0ying_Orange I will ignore that..


@Ann0ying_Orange @Lt_Kowalski_ Knife.


@Lt_Kowalski_ @Ann0ying_Orange I have a cup and a juicer by my side.. Want a round?


@Ann0ying_Orange @Lt_Kowalski_ Naaaaa. I'm good bro :3


@Lt_Kowalski_ @Ann0ying_Orange Then move back a bit because I have a lemon..


@Ann0ying_Orange @Lt_Kowalski_ Whut....

@Lt_Kowalski_ @Ann0ying_Orange Nothing..


@Ann0ying_Orange @Lt_Kowalski_ Ms.Gomez shall get you.~


@Lt_Kowalski_ @Ann0ying_Orange Who the hell is that?


@Ann0ying_Orange @Lt_Kowalski_ MS.GOMEZZZZZ. MAH SELENA GOMEZZZZ. DAT GOMEZZZZ.



@Lt_Kowalski_ @Ann0ying_Orange Uhh... That didn't make sense.. Why don't you crawl into a #pantry and die already..

         
As I said in the last chapter, they couldn't keep dodging the laser beams forever. So what did they do?
Well, the answer was simple. Rico barfed up a stick of dynamite and blew up the laser. Ikala was not happy.
I: Do you realize what you've just done? It took me ten years to build that! And that's not including the time it took me just to design the blueprint!
Me: Dude, you seriously need to get a life.
I: Oh I will get a life. I'll take yours! *Starts blasting them with balls of darkness from his flippers*(Remember, they can do magic. If you have any other questions you can ask me in the comments.)...
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Melody woke up, and looked around at her surroundings. At first she was confused, but then the events of the previous day flooded her mind. She found her long-lost brothers and they were about embark on a journey to Antarctica to rescue said location. She looked at the clock on the wall next to her and saw that it was 5:00am, which meant she woke up an hour early. She glanced at the still-sleeping boys opposite to her and made a few hasty calculations. If she kept it short, she would be able to make it back at about roughly 6:00. She gathered her stuff(which is basically her quiver and bow,...
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Chapter 6: The ‘meeting’
Everybody was talking at the same time, so Pat had to shut them up. “Okay, could everybody please shut up?” Pat said. “Quiet! Thank you!” Mort exclaimed. “Thank you Mort. Okay, can everybody hear me?” Pat asked. Nobody says anything. “So, we called this meeting to tell you who tranquilized you guys.” Pat said. Kowalski started, “Okay, for the Cooper Gang and Carmelita Fox, it was Muggshot. For the Emperor Penguins and the Adelie penguin, it was the boss Skua.” Pat continued, “For the guardians and Nyra, it was the Striga.” “What? I thought...
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*Kowalski's PoV*

"THREE...TWO...ONE...!"

Blowhole's base explodes in a firey ball of toxic gasses and total destruction. We feel the heat, depsite the fact we're at a reasonably safe distance. No-one could survive THAT explosion.

Even Rico seems too upset to enjoy the, usually, delightful sensation an explosion gives him. I can't say I blame him. His leader and friends are in there.

WERE in there.

Now, they were probably with Manfreedi and Johnson, where ever THEY are. They've most likely gone to a better place. I've never known Skipper to be religous, though there is a lot I don't know about him....
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the next mourning.

Me: (wakes up) well I manage to get some rest but I gotta keep crawling.

but then i was in for a shock.

Me: alright don't worry Kiva you can do this (turns over my body which becomes a big problem) (screams in pain)

Skipper: (wakes up) what's with all the screaming?

Mort: how come she's crying in pain?

Private: oh dear skipper her lower part where it's protective is gone!

Me (in pain): b but i gotta keep crawling (drags myself but the pain makes it worse) ow!!!!

Skipper: Kiva stop dragging yourself the lower part of your body is already in pain your crawling is going to make it worse!...
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posted by stlouisfan
(Penguin HQ. Late at night)
Private climbed out of his bed and walked into the next room. He pulled the tape recorder out again and began his next recording.

"Okay okay. Today was worse than any other. Today he actually appeared before me. In broad daylight. He has never done that before. What's worse is that I heard something. Something not normal. Something I wouldn't expect to hear in the zoo. Not in a million years. Like children screaming. I don't know what he'll do next. This tall thin man with the long arms," Private whispered clearly into the tape recorder.

He took a few moments to breath...
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posted by andresandru
"Marlene?!" Skipper said, coonfused

"you heard me comando,
don't seem a dumb,
get this out
or I'll break your lung!" Marlene sang

"hahaha! it worked!!!!" Private shouted

"so the real cause was actualy you,
what a liar, what a no-good,
you annoying rainbow-lover, yes you,
you're completly crazy, you should be mr. bad mood!"

Suddently Private changed, he was wearing a half-broken skull T-shirt and was eating a brown lollypop

"Private?" Kowalski said lowly, Private turned andthrew his lolypop at the brainy

"Private!" Skipper said "those aren't modals of a-" Skipper stopped himself seeing that Private didn't...
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*Guys please note that Starlite is my first and ONLY character i will be adding (If you'r a Skilene fan you will LOVE her!) And i LOVE my music, so in parts of the article i will be putting names of songs inbetween *...Hope you like :P(Hope its not far-fetched)*

*Coldplay-Paradise"
It was a starry night in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean.All was silent night. A motorbike (similiar to the one's on Tron legacy) appeard in the distance, a human figure was ontop of the bike.The suit always reminded her of Tron, she smiled at the thought. Tron's wasnt purple.Suddenly she heard the rumble of a much...
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Okay, I never was in Central Park and don't know what species of trees are growing there, so I took the ones which are spread widely over my country…




Flight And Sacrifices


Private had spotted him too.

"Oh no" he heard Kowalski say quietly through the wind.

Skipper made a step in their direction.

"Run" Kowalski whispered, but nobody moved.

Skipper was now walking towards them. First slow, then faster.

"RUN!" Kowalski shouted and they turned around and fled into the forest. Kowalski looked back and saw Skipper getting nearer. He was fast and they were too slow. Private and Rico just couldn't...
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It was a rainy day in the zoo of new york. The time is 2:30pm and the penguins are inside there home.

Private: This is the boring day ever, I wish we can do something that we never try yet.

Skipper: Well Private, we have to wait for the rain to go away. It`s too wet and cold.

Kait: *comes in as a penguin and shakes to dry her feathers* You guys, don`t go outside or you will be wet like me.

Skipper: Kait.....

Kait: What?

Kowalski: *comes out of his lab and see Kait and the wet floor* Kait, you got the floor wet.

Sikpper: HEY, I was goes to say that!

Rico: * comes in with wet feathers*

Skipper and Kowalski:...
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(HQ)
skipper:alright men we have traing today
Private:can't we have a day off please
Skipper:no
Kowalski:please
Skipper:No!
Rico:PLEASE!
skipper:FINE
penguins:YAH!!!!
(3 hours later and TV turns on)
Skipper:hey what's going on?
Private:I don't know
Dr.Blowhole:pen-guy-ins
Skipper:BLOWHOLE
blowhole:miss me I know I did
Kowalski:no we didn't
(ringtails cames in)
Julien:hello silly penguins
Skipper:RINGTAILS
kowalski:well what do u want
Blowhole:oh nothing is that I have one of your teammates
(private shows on the screen)
Skipper:whoa did not see that caming
Kowalski:PRIVATE!!!!!
Rico:grrr bark bark
posted by have64
Kowalski: This will be the perfect gift for Have.

Private: Oh, a present what is it?

Kowalski: It's a Conscience Separator Ray and I need Have to test it.

Have: Sup peeps.

Kowalski: I see extending your vocabulary failed. Anyway Say hello to the Conscience Separator Ray.

Have: Alright!
(Kowalski zap Have and a puff of black smoke appeared)

Skipper: What's all the noise! Where's Have?
Kowalski: No worries Skipper, Have can you here me?!
Have: Yeah!
????:Yes!
Skipper: Who said that?
Have:*Gasp* Sixty
Sixty: Yes, it is me Sixty Four Have's Conscience.
Have: Oh yeah Kowalski, why did you invented your Conscience...
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