I was out hiking in the woods with a few friends of mine, when we all got lost and accidentally split up. Unfortunately, I got myself into the middle of the forest, and now I have NO idea how to get home.
For about an hour or so, I sat on a stump, praying that my friends would find a chopper and pick me up.
Pfft. Some friends I have.
Suddenly, a dark figure was walking toward me. She had beautiful, long black hair, and was wearing a skirt that went over her knees--bad clothing for the forest.
I took my notepad out of my backpack and set it on my knees.

Me: You're Pocahontas, right?

Pocahontas: *nodding* Yes. Are you lost?

Me: *sighing* Yes, but I don't want to waste time. Do you mind if I interview you?

Pocahontas: *sitting down on the ground* Sure you can.

Me: *flipping through notepad* From my research, I hear that you like jumping off cliffs. Are you suicidal?

Pocahontas: *gaping* No, never! I jump for the fun of it. I love the wind in my hair!

Me: If you hadn't gotten married, would you consider being a daredevil?

Pocahontas: Well, my father won't allow it.

Me: *writing* Ooh, you're a daddy's girl, aren't you?

Pocahontas: Of course. I love my father very much.

Me: *scoffs* I barely see mine.

Pocahontas: *clicking tongue* That's sad.

Me: Why did you marry John Rolfe when it was JOHN SMITH whom you fell in love with?

Pocahontas: I guess things change.

Me: But why would you leave a hot, blonde man that loves the thrill of adventure for a goody-two-shoes?

Pocahontas: It's hard to understand. Sometimes you love someone, but then you meet someone else and love them even MORE.

Me: *muttering* Glad I'm not in a relationship.

Pocahontas: You don't believe in the power of love?

Me: No....

Pocahontas: *grabbing me by the shoulders and starts to shake me* Are you MAD? There's nothing more powerful than LOVE!

Me: *screaming* WHY ARE YOU SHAKING ME?!

Pocahontas: *letting go* Sorry, sometimes I go so overboard, I hardly notice.

Me: *glaring* Do the other princesses ever visit you here?

Pocahontas: Well, the only one who's ever visited me here was Mulan, because she wanted to be in a peaceful place for her fighting.

Me: Are you ever jealous of the other princesses because they have a house and you don't?

Pocahontas: *shaking head* Nope. I'm perfectly happy right now.

Me: Wow. I can NOT be happy living out in the woods.

Pocahontas: *frowning* Why not? The forest is very beautiful.

Me: How could you stand the bear droppings all around? And how you don't have a bathroom? And what about those freaky demon squirrels who watch you when you sleep?

Pocahontas: You watch too many scary movies, don't you?

Me: Yes, yes I do. Would you ever agree if someone called you a hippie?

Pocahontas: Well, yes, because hippies believe in peace and so do I.

Me: By far, you're the hippiest princess ever.

Pocahontas: Why, thank you.

Me: That wasn't a compliment.

Pocahontas: *starting to walk away* Good luck getting out of here.

Jeez, was it something that I said? These princesses need a reality check, like pronto.

Comment if you want more!! :D