Anyways, what anime do I hate with a bloody passion? One word: Hetalia. I gave it a try, and the results were... less than desirable.
I'm going to be brutally honest here. I had more fun watching Princess Tutu.
I had more fun watching Transformers Energon.
I had more fun watching the 4Kids dub of One Piece.
I had more fun watching Naruto.
I had more fun watching the cutscenes from Hotel Mario.
I had more fun watching Boku No Pico.
I had more fun watching Shounen Maid Kuro-kun.
No, I'm not kidding (though considering what Boku No Pico and Shounen Maid Kuro-kun are, I kinda wish I was). I got more enjoyment out of watching animated gay child porn than I did watching Hetalia.
The animation was garbage. I've seen plenty of anime where the animation was bad because the animators were too lazy, but with Hetalia, it's as if the animators were trying too hard to make things look cute. And I know that "cute" was what they were going for. However, I like to compare animation tones to chocolate. Some of it is good, but too much of it is just absolutely terrible. I thought that Sonic the Hedgehog: The Movie had bad animation (even though that movie was awesome), but Hetalia just takes the cake.
The characters in Hetalia suck more than a black hole. One thing that's important about anime (along with any other series) is whether or not the characters are likable. One of the reasons why Soul Eater is a good anime is because they give reasons why you should like the characters. Black Star is a good character because he can be cocky, arrogant, and funny at times (not only that, but he's a freaking assassin, and who doesn't love assassins?), and he also cares for his friends, especially his weapon Tsubaki. They also give a backstory for him about where he comes from, how he became a skilled meister, how he became partners with Tsubaki, so on and so forth. Death the Kid, Liz, and Patty are good characters because they can be really badass at times, and funny at others. They also gave a backstory about how they became partners and how Liz and Patty were before they became partners.
As for Hetalia characters like Romano, Germany, Prussia, France, America... why would anyone like these characters? Cause from those 5 to 6 Hetalia episodes I wasted my time on, I saw no reasons to like or care about those characters. Italy is an obnoxious and annoying brat who obsesses over nothing but italian food. Japan was just as flat and lifeless as a blank chalkboard. Germany was extremely idiotic (and not in a good way like Squatt and Baboo from Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers). Quite frankly, the fact that these... (I guess we can call them-) characters have fangirls who will squeal and obsess over them astounds me to no end.
The humor... good god, the humor. I'm going to say this right now before anyone uses the parody argument: there's GOOD satire (The Boondocks, Big Money Hustlas, Spaceballs, Monty Python and the Holy Grail, and You Nazty Spy!), and then there's BAD satire (Kickassia, Disaster Movie, Scary Movie 4, The 41-Year-Old Virgin Who Knocked Up Sarah Marshall and Felt Superbad About It, and of course... Hetalia). Almost every single joke in Hetalia is a joke that only 4-year-olds would use. It doesn't matter how many times you fangirls spam the annoying "PASTA!!!" joke. It was never funny to begin with, and it never will be.
The voice acting is horrendous. Now, when I gave Hetalia a try, I watched the english dub by Funimation on Netflix. I love Funimation, and I do think that they can churn out fantastic dubs. However, even their skill at dubbing isn't enough to save the hunk of garbage known as Hetalia. Italy's voice is extremely annoying, Germany is more wooden than a tree, Japan's voice just adds to his lifelessness, the list goes on. Also, since Todd Haberkorn voices Italy, I can never think of characters like Death the Kid and Tsukune Aono the same way ever again.
*is done venting steam* I apologize if this was too much for you to read, but I'm being serious when I say that Hetalia is the WORST anime I've ever seen. It's even worse than Boku No Pico. At least Boku No Pico had decent animation (I'm not hinting at anything with that statement), and even though it made me upchuck last night's dinner, at least Boku No Pico didn't make me feel like I died inside.
I'm done here. I'm going to sign off for now, I'm going to shut everything off, I'm going to jump in my bed, and I'm going to sleep for 6 happy hours while listening to some soothing music since it's currently 12:50 PM where I'm at, and I'm starting to get a little tired from venting all that rage. See you next morning.
May I present to you the WORST of the characters... and the most obsessed over.
Even with the looks of a handsome, noble man, he STILL has all the personality of a brick.
If there's one thing that Hetalia's good at, it's tainting and ruining other series, most of which are far superior.
I used to adore Sailor Moon, but now... *cries* Hetalia has just corrupted a fantastic anime.
What do fangirls see in that pipsqueak Italy? *chomps Tootsie Pop in one bite* The world may never know.
As men, they suck. As women...... they still suck.
