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posted by Windwakerguy430


Well, if I had any credibility left after the Call of Duty entry, now is the time to lose it completely and be seen as a hack piece of shit in the gaming world. So, without further ado, let me just say that I like Fable. Yes, that Peter Molyneux game that was built on lies and betrayals. And I also like Fable II. But not Fable III. No one likes that one.
So, first off, do I like Peter Molyneux as a game developer? Hell no. I think he is a huge liar and that whole Godus thing is the seediest shit ever. But, I still do enjoy Fable II as its own thing simply for the fact that it was one of the first action RPGs I ever played. That’s… probably sad to some people, but it was a fun time for me. Playing as a young hero, you explore the very English world of Albion as you find other heroes to help you in your cause to defeat the villain Lucien. The game teaches you three skill sets, melee, with swords and axes, skill, with pistols and rifles, and wisdom, which teaches you a ton of busted magic skills. The world has a ton of little towns with an assortment of villagers, from major cities to small farm villages. But one of the mechanics of this game is the moral system, and while it’s not the best, I still enjoyed it. You can choose to be a saint, or a villain yourself, or just a neutral person, and depending on what you do, people will react differently. Which can get a little annoying cause these fucking people won’t get out of my damn house, Jesus, I just want to sleep! The story, while not original, was fun to go through, and the side quests were all a ton of fun to play. The game has a very witty style of writing. It’s very Monty Python-esque in it’s dry witty humor. Another thing I love are the assortment of crazy weapons you can get. You can get a lute as an axe, you can get a giant mace, and if I remember correctly, there is a rifle and armor in this game that looks just like the gun from Halo. This was a Microsoft game, after all.
Fable II is a very simple action RPG. Very, very ,VERY simple, and will not do anything to surprise you. But I have a lot of fond memories of this game and thought it was a real good time. I put over a hundred hours into this game just buying property and creating a sort of massive landlord economy for the entire country and felt pretty successful about it, despite having WAY too much gold and having nothing to spend it on. Fable II won’t turn any heads in the RPG world, but I still see it as a classic from my childhood.
King of Red Lions: Now that we have all the orbs, we can finally place them on three islands and get into another temple
Link: FUUUUUUUU-

Blue Statue: (Heavy sigh)
Link: So, are you one of the statues I have to, for some reason, place a ball on
Blue Statue: Whatever
Link: Um.... Okay (Places ball on statue)

Red Statue: Who the fuck are you
Link: Um... I came to give you this ball
Red Statue: Get the fuck out of my face
Link: I'll just place it here (Places ball on statue)

Green Statue: Wow, man, welcome, bro
Link: Yeah, can you hold this
Green Statue: Sure man, I'll hold your ball....... Oh man, man, that...
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added by Windwakerguy430
added by Windwakerguy430
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Wind: (Sleeping)
Mom: Wind, wake up
Wind: (Wakes up) What, mom?
Mom: You overslept again. Were you too excited for the festival
Wind: Kinda, but that’s only because that festival is the only interesting thing that happens in this damn village
Mom: Well, you’d better hurry. And remember. I want you to behave yourself
Wind: Sure… I’ll be sure to behave myself

Wind: (Walking into the festival) Okay, so, what should I do fi- (Gets bumped into)
Marle: (Falls onto the ground)
Wind: Goddamn, it watch where you’re going
Marle: (Drops her locket)
Wind: (Picks it up) (What a nice locket. Maybe I could...
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(Light appears from ocean)
King of Red Lions: Here it is, the portal to the sacred realm
Link: Are you sure it isn't hell
King of Red Lions: Of course not..... Except for the fact that this sacred realm only has Dubstep. I hate dubstep. But, it does hold the sacred saber, so head to get the sacred saber stuck in the sacred plinth in the sacred realm
Link: What makes this place so sacred, exactly
King of Red Lions: I......... Don't know. Just go and get the sword
Link: Fine
(Link and King of Red Lions go into ocean)

(Link and King of Red Lions rise from ocean)
King of Red Lions: There, are you okay Link...
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King of Red Lions: Ah, here we are. Forest Haven
Link: If its a haven, then why is there a temple that is possibly filled with demonic hellspawns
King Red of Lions: ........................................... Anyway, just go and meet the Great Deku Tree
Link: Wait, didn't that guy die in the past games
King of Red Lions: Yeah, but were in a different game, so its okay
Link: Oh okay

Link: Okay, so where is this giant tree
Great Deku Tree: Oh, hello there, good sir
Link: Who are you
Great Deku Tree: I am the Great Deku Tree....... obviously. I am the only tree in the world with a face
Link: So, where is...
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Link: (Wakes up) Ow, sweet jesus that sucked
???: Ah, good to see your awake
Link: Who said that? Are you a ghost
???: No (Boat turns its head towards Link) It is I. The King of Red Lions. Your new sidekick
Link: AHHHHHH
King of Red Lions: Did I startle you
Link: Well yes
King of Red Lions: I guess its the fact that I can talk
Link: No
King of Red Lions: Well, it happens a lo- Wait, no?
Link: Yeah. I was startled that you weren't annoying. I mean, most sidekicks are like this
Navi: HEY LISTEN HEY LISTEN
Link: Or this
Kebora Gebora: If you are ever lost, look at your map. Now stay there while I tell you...
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added by Windwakerguy430
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added by DisneyPrince88
added by DisneyPrince88
Well, everyone, we finally reached the 200th article. Can you believe it. Over 199 articles and one whole year later, and we have done so much to do with this series. So, what can I do for you guys to celebrate this 200th article and one year anniversary? Simple. I will review a movie. Yeah, crazy isn’t it. I have NEVER reviewed a movie before in this series, but, for you guys, I am going to make the first movie review for you guys. So, what film am I going to review for you guys? Well, how about Where the Dead Go to Die… Oooohh…. shit. So, before I review this movie, I need to tell you...
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added by cosmic_fusions
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Everybody: *On their phones*

Jared: Uh, don't you guys want to talk or something?

Joshua: NO. PHONES ARE EVERYTHING JARED. >:)

Jared: Ok then.... o____O

Jared: Then, uh, anybody want to go outside? Play some Baseball? Anything that isn't related to pho-

Everyone: NO!

Jared: Alright then. Today is going to be FUN. -_____-

*A little while later*

Joshua: Oh no, my phones almost out of battery. Better charge it up! :D

Madison: Funny, I was going to say the same thing....

Mike: I do NOT like where this is going..... o_____O

*Everyone's phone dies out*

Mike: So Jared, how many power outlets do you have...
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added by Seanthehedgehog
Patrick's ghost will rape Spongebob.
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comedy
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