Compiled from the Twitter contest held by @nerdist.
JanetVarney: Yo momma so fat the Sorting Hat put her in all four houses
chris8675309: Yo mamma so stupid, she thinks Sirius Black is the soul station on satellite radio
sarazafar: Yo mama so fat she tried to eat Cornelius Fudge
dino_rider: Yo mama’s so ugly the Dementor’s Kiss was swapped out for a hearty handshake and a promise to give her a call sometime.
bradheintz: Yo mama so nasty, Dobby wouldn’t take her sock
Burnaway: Yo momma so skanky, even her patronus got knocked up
chompychomp: Yo mama so stupid, she drowned in a pensieve
Dick_M: yo momma so dumb she thought that she could talk to snakes if she put parsley on her tongue
dtejano: Yo mama’s so masculine, she makes Dumbledore go, “DAAAYYYUMM!”
habcous: yo mamma so nasty, every pair of her panties has the Dark Mark
HakSolo: your mom is so fat if she confronted a boggart it would morph into a treadmill
dantelfer: Yo mamma so fat, she has to enchant her panties into a portkey to get out of a chair
dirk_funk: Yo mama so fat it takes two boggarts to shape-shift into her
MarioEGarcia: yo mama so poor she went to Honeydukes and put a chocolate frog on layaway
melgotserved: Yo momma’s so fat she got stuck in the Floo Network
melgotserved: Yo momma’s so fat her wand is a Slim Jim
MikeDrucker: Yo’ Momma so fat she joined the Death Eaters ’cause she was hungry
MsJG: Yo Momma’s so fugly that even Voldemort won’t speak her name
paulscheer: Yo Mamma is so fat that even the Dementors can’t suck out her soul in one sitting
phirm: Yo Mama so nasty, everybody call her “She-Who-Must-Not-Be-Naked”
Taborifica: Yo momma so fat even her Quidditch robes have stretch marks
MarioEGarcia Yo momma's so fat the sorting hat assigned her to the House of Pancakes
cvgurau: Your momma so dumb, they put the Sorting Hat on her head and all it heard was an echo.
chris8675309: Your momma so fat, she looked in the mirror of Erised and saw a ham
DavidAkers: Yo momma so old, there ain't an Age Line that can stop her.
elchupahueso: your family's so poor that you make the weaseleys look like the Malfoy's!
girl_noir: Yo mamma so fat, she splinched herself an' nobody noticed.
HakSolo: Your mom is so ugly when she walked into Gringotts Wizarding Bank, they gave her a job application.
hollibo83: yo mama so ugly when she was born the doctor screamed "riddikulus"
MarioEGarcia: Yo mama so old, she used to babysit Dumbledore
DavidAkers: Yo momma so ugly, no one can tell when she's an Animagus.
R-Silent: Yo momma so fat her patronus is a cake
JanetVarney: Yo momma so fat the Sorting Hat put her in all four houses
chris8675309: Yo mamma so stupid, she thinks Sirius Black is the soul station on satellite radio
sarazafar: Yo mama so fat she tried to eat Cornelius Fudge
dino_rider: Yo mama’s so ugly the Dementor’s Kiss was swapped out for a hearty handshake and a promise to give her a call sometime.
bradheintz: Yo mama so nasty, Dobby wouldn’t take her sock
Burnaway: Yo momma so skanky, even her patronus got knocked up
chompychomp: Yo mama so stupid, she drowned in a pensieve
Dick_M: yo momma so dumb she thought that she could talk to snakes if she put parsley on her tongue
dtejano: Yo mama’s so masculine, she makes Dumbledore go, “DAAAYYYUMM!”
habcous: yo mamma so nasty, every pair of her panties has the Dark Mark
HakSolo: your mom is so fat if she confronted a boggart it would morph into a treadmill
dantelfer: Yo mamma so fat, she has to enchant her panties into a portkey to get out of a chair
dirk_funk: Yo mama so fat it takes two boggarts to shape-shift into her
MarioEGarcia: yo mama so poor she went to Honeydukes and put a chocolate frog on layaway
melgotserved: Yo momma’s so fat she got stuck in the Floo Network
melgotserved: Yo momma’s so fat her wand is a Slim Jim
MikeDrucker: Yo’ Momma so fat she joined the Death Eaters ’cause she was hungry
MsJG: Yo Momma’s so fugly that even Voldemort won’t speak her name
paulscheer: Yo Mamma is so fat that even the Dementors can’t suck out her soul in one sitting
phirm: Yo Mama so nasty, everybody call her “She-Who-Must-Not-Be-Naked”
Taborifica: Yo momma so fat even her Quidditch robes have stretch marks
MarioEGarcia Yo momma's so fat the sorting hat assigned her to the House of Pancakes
cvgurau: Your momma so dumb, they put the Sorting Hat on her head and all it heard was an echo.
chris8675309: Your momma so fat, she looked in the mirror of Erised and saw a ham
DavidAkers: Yo momma so old, there ain't an Age Line that can stop her.
elchupahueso: your family's so poor that you make the weaseleys look like the Malfoy's!
girl_noir: Yo mamma so fat, she splinched herself an' nobody noticed.
HakSolo: Your mom is so ugly when she walked into Gringotts Wizarding Bank, they gave her a job application.
hollibo83: yo mama so ugly when she was born the doctor screamed "riddikulus"
MarioEGarcia: Yo mama so old, she used to babysit Dumbledore
DavidAkers: Yo momma so ugly, no one can tell when she's an Animagus.
R-Silent: Yo momma so fat her patronus is a cake
In these articles, I'll be taking you back in time, to when the movies began. I'll show you how they did it and why.
First up, a quick look at the immaturity of a twelve-year-old boy.
The following is a direct quote.
"We did a lot of pranks. Once Daniel Radcliffe brought in a remote-controlled whoopee cushion. He tried it on me, but it didn't quite work. Then he tried it on someone else who was going to sit down on a massive sofa. When it went off, Chris Columbus said, 'Cut! What is that thing?' and everyone burst into laughter. Dan pulled other pranks too--like making little labels that said 'Kick me' or 'Punch me.' He would stick them on the backs of everyone who came into sight. It was really good."
Emma Watson, 2002
Classic. Who knew that people still fall for the "Kick me" signs? I sure didn't. I'm a bit scared to think of the pranks pulled in the later years.
First up, a quick look at the immaturity of a twelve-year-old boy.
The following is a direct quote.
"We did a lot of pranks. Once Daniel Radcliffe brought in a remote-controlled whoopee cushion. He tried it on me, but it didn't quite work. Then he tried it on someone else who was going to sit down on a massive sofa. When it went off, Chris Columbus said, 'Cut! What is that thing?' and everyone burst into laughter. Dan pulled other pranks too--like making little labels that said 'Kick me' or 'Punch me.' He would stick them on the backs of everyone who came into sight. It was really good."
Emma Watson, 2002
Classic. Who knew that people still fall for the "Kick me" signs? I sure didn't. I'm a bit scared to think of the pranks pulled in the later years.
![](http://images5.fanpop.com/image/articles/137000/harry-potter_137501_top.jpg?cache=1323906689)
Cornelius Fudge, the Minister for Magic, denied that he had any plans to take over the running of the Wizarding Bank, Gringotts, when he was elected Minister for Magic five years ago. Fudge has always insisted that he wants nothing more than to "cooperate peacefully" with the guardians of our gold.
BUT DOES HE?
Sources close to the Minister have recently disclosed that Fudge's dearest ambition is to seize control of the goblin gold supplies and that he will not hesitate to use force if need be.
"It wouldn't be the first time, either," said a Ministry insider. "Cornelius 'Goblin-Crusher' Fudge, that's what his friends call him, if you could hear him when he thinks no one's listening, oh, he's always talking about the goblins and he's had done in; he's had them drowned, he's had them dropped off buildings, he's had them poisoned, he's had them cooked in pies...."
![Tonks and her husband, Remus Lupin, Tonks and her husband, Remus Lupin,](http://images4.fanpop.com/image/articles/92000/harry-potter_92745_top.jpg?cache=1295970177)
Tonks and her husband, Remus Lupin,