Light: (Sitting in chair)
Ryuk: You know, Light. It’s been a week since you got that FBI guys name… Why haven’t you killed him yet
Light: Ryuk, out yourself in my shoes. Being Kira is hard work. Maybe, once in a while, I just want to relax.
Ryuk: Hard work? The most work you’ve done the past week is get up to go and take a piss
Light: Hard work
Ryuk: Oh, Jesus Christ
link
Raye: Hey, dear
Naomi: Raye, there you are. I was so worried ab-
Raye: Yeah, that’s great. Where’s dinner
Naomi: Honey, what happened while you were gone
Raye: Well, I spied on some child and some crazy criminal got killed by a car
Naomi: Oh, so the usual stuff, huh
Raye: Yes….. Now about my dinner
(The Next Day)
Raye: I can’t believe I got to go out to eat tonight. That lazy woman can’t do anything for herself. You’d think forcing her into the kitchen would help her learn to cook by now
Light: (Behind him) Raye Pepper
Raye: Huh? No, it’s Penber
Light: Whatever. I want to let you know that I am Kira
Raye: How can I tell it’s you
Light: Because I am
Raye: (Suddenly filled with fear) *Damn it. It’s Kira* What do you want
(They both get on a train)
Light: I want the names of all the FBI agents. If you don’t, I will kill your wife
Raye: Sucks to be you, Kira. She can’t cook for shit, so nothing to worry me
Light: If she dies, how will you do the sex
Raye: …… Damn you, Kira
Light: Yep, damn me. Now get to work, Raye Panther
Raye: (Writes down the names of the FBI agents)
Light: Good, now get off
Raye: (Walks off the train) Perhaps he’ll spare m- (Suddenly has a heart attack) (Looks back at the train, and see’s Light)
Light: Good by, Raye Pandabear
Raye: (Dies right there as the train leaves)
(The Next Day)
President: Regardless, the American FBI can not be a part of this anymore. We’re pulling out
Matsuda: That’s what she said
President: ……….. Good bye (Hangs up)
L: Matsuda, why did you make that joke
Matsuda: It just seemed that-
L: Go to the corner of shame and think about what you said
Matsuda: But-
L: Now!
Matsuda: (Stands in the corner)
L: So, how many is left
Soichiro: Well, all that is left is me, Aizawa, Mogi, Ukita, Matsuda-
L: Who gives a shit about Matsuda
Soichiro: And some guy who will leave in a couple of seconds, so we’ll ignore his name
L: Very good. Now, I would like for all of you to come to my hotel room. I want to meet all of you in person. If you can trust me, then I GUESS I could trust you… If I have to
(Meanwhile)
Naomi: I can’t believe Raye is dead. He was so nice to me
(Flashbacks)
Raye: Woman, where is my dinner
(End of flashback)
Naomi: I swear, Kira. I will catch you. Even if it kills me
Creator: WHAT A COINCIDENCE
To Be Continued