As I sat looking at the man I loved, I wondered how I’d gotten here. I was your typical American girl with a bad past. I told myself that after Steven walked out I’d never love again, and yet here I was on a plane to a romantic island getaway. I turned to Jasper and whispered in his ear.
“I’m so glad I have you and now you’re all mine.”
“Ashley,” he moaned, “don’t do this to me.” I looked down to see the bulge in his pants.
“Why? Turning you on?”
“Baby I love you but stop.”
“Okay,” I backed off. I felt Jasper run his hand over my leg, grabbing my hand in my lap.
“Ashley, look at me, please.” I was stubborn and he knew this. “Baby, sweetheart, Ash, Ashley, hun, beautiful.” I turned and looked at him. “I’m sorry, you understand, right?”
“I try to, but sometimes it’s hard, it feels so much like rejection.”
“It’s not,” I turned away so that he wouldn’t see the tears slip from my eyes. I felt his hand wipe the tears away. “Baby don’t cry, we just got married, I love you. Come on Baby.”
“Sorry,” I cried, “but I can’t stop crying. I keep seeing his face and your words just sparked a sore spot.”
“Well,” he whispered in my ear, “in a few hours I can totally erase that doubt and fear in your eyes.” I smiled, “I’m glad we waited.”
“Me too,” I didn’t have the heart to tell him that the reason why I’d said no to sex was because I was afraid. I was afraid of being broken, I was afraid of getting close to someone, and more than anything I was still afraid.
“Ashley?” I heard Jasper say.
“Huh? Did you say something?”
“Yes. You should get some sleep.”
“I can’t all I’ll do is have nightmares. All I’ll do is see his face.”
“Oh really?” he began rubbing my arm and then laid my head on his shoulders. I could feel my body giving in and drifting off. I feel into a deep dream, I was running as fast as I could, running from something or someone. I felt like I was running out of air making it very difficult to breathe. Then I saw his face and I fell into a big black hole. Landing in another scene.
I watched as a woman laid balled up on floor. I watched as she sobbed and then her husband came in.
"Get up."
"Can't you just leave me alone? You got what you wanted! What more could you want?"
"Oh stop blubbering it was just a fetus."
"ONLY A FETUS!!! That was MY BABY!!! I hate you! I HATE YOU!!!"
"If you hate me so much why don't you leave?"
"Get away from me!" Then the scene faded and I was in another scene.
Comment and maybe I'll finish.