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LiLa_66, Simmeh and 7 others like this

Simmeh LOL

BrandonT hahahahahahaha lol

415

(TONS of) true, funny, random Facts

posted by hm94991

I found this link. This will last you days. XD

Between 1942 and 1944, Academy Awards were made of plaster.

John Madden is an accomplished ballroom dancer.

One out of three employees who received a promotion use a coffee mug with the company logo on it.

About a third of all Americans flush the toilet while they're still sitting on it.

According to Genesis 1:20-22 the chicken came before the egg.

Soldiers from every country salute with their right hand.

The microwave oven was invented by mistake when an engineer testing a magnetron tube noticed that the radiation from it melted the chocolate bar he...

394

Quotes about backstabbing and ex-friends.

posted by monLOVEbrucas

-Im sorry did my back hurt you're knife?

-Never turn you're back on a friend, thats the best target.

-While you're stabbing my back, you can kiss my ass too.

-All the mistakes in the world couldnt measure up to the day i thought i could trust you.

-Yeah, being apathetic is a pathetic way to be...
but I don't care, what matters to you does not matter to me

-When your up, your friends know who you are.
When you're down, you know who your friends are.

-You can't laugh last If I stab you in the throat with...the knife you left in my back.

-I was the one who said things changed;
you were the one who proved...

73

comebacks after someone says you're gay.

posted by Tamar20

1)"Why, do you find me irresistible?"

2)"No, I just dress better than you"

3)"You're a double gay. No returnsies!"

4)"I love the second grade insults, *insert name here*. Honestly, isn't it strange how "gay" has come to replace "stupid"? And so what if I was gay? Insulting my sexual orientation is pointless.

NOW...if a girl says you're gay, and you actually are, I find the best burn is: "At least I can get a boyfriend."

5)Look them in the face with a deadpan expression. Simply say, "Yes. I'm gay," and walk away. Take their thunder away. It's such a juvenile thing to say in the first place.
Or...

68

The 56 Worst Analogies from High School Papers

posted by moodystuff449

1. Her eyes were like two brown circles with big black dots in the center.

2. He was as tall as a 6′3″ tree.

3. Her face was a perfect oval, like a circle that had its two sides gently compressed by a Thigh Master.

4. From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you’re on vacation in another city and Jeopardy comes on at 7:00 p.m. instead of 7:30.

5. John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.

6. She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up.

7. The ballerina...

9

100 THINGS GOING THROUGH A CRAZY PERSON'S HEAD

posted by PsychadelicSkye

1.Do not introduce self as roleplaying character in public.
2.Do not talk to fictional characters in public.
3.Do not answer fictional characters in public.
4.Do not talk to inanimate objects in public.
5.Do not go out in public.
6.Disregard above note.Perform numbers 1 to 4.
7.Note expressions.
8.Don't die alone. Take many people with you.
9.Floor is slippery when wet.
10.Lake is slippery when dry.
11.Only talk to strangers you know.
12.Strangers you don't know are spies... Kill them all.
13.For legal purposes be sure to delete above note.
14.Tell people about the spies that are trying to kill you.
15.Kill...

6

41 Corny ass jokes!!

posted by XxLalasaysxX

Here are my list of corny jokes. Now i'm just gonna let you know now i got alot of these from the youtube channel, vlogbrothers. So check them out too. Prepare to laugh.
(Make sure your not drinking anything or eating anything you might spit it or something.)

#1 How did the hipster burn his tongue?
He drank coffee before it was cool.

#2 Why are celsius and farenheit friends?
Because they're fair-in-height. (I came up with that one :)

#3 Why was the broom late to work?
It overswept!

#4 Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
Because if they flew over the bay they'd be bagels.

#5 What's Michelle Obama's favorite...

39

A Funny Text Message !!!

posted by Shelly_McShelly

my friend sent me this text message a while ago and i thought it was hilarious!!!

i need to ask you somethingand i want you to be totally honest with me. it may be awkward between us after this but i have to kow how you feel... I've kept it in for a while now but now it's time to be straight up and just confront you. i hope this doesn't ruin anything we have, i just need to know and i dont see any other way i could get over this. it just doesn't seem fair if i dont gett an answer. i want you to tell me truthfully, please no matter how harsh it is. i just want your hoest opinion...

Pepsi or Coke?

Ha ha ha ha !!!
Funny.

6

New Zodiac Dates!

added by xxXsk8trXxx

34

72 things guys should know about girls

posted by karpach_13

72 things Guys should know about Girls <3...

1. Stay on the phone with her even if shes not saying anything.

2. When she's mad hug her tight and don't let go.

3. When she says she's ok dont believe it, talk with her.

4. Call her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her you love her.

5. Call her before you sleep and after you wake up

6. Treat her like she's all that matters to you.

7. Tease her and let her tease you back.

8. Stay up all night with her when she's sick.

9. Watch her favorite movie with her or her favorite show even if you think its stupid.

10. Give her the world.

11. Let her wear your clothes....

Mary Mary Quite Contrary meaning

posted by 1-2vampire

The Brittish Nursery Rhyme about Bloody Mary - Mary Tudor - or Mary I.

Mary Mary quite contrary,
how does your garden grow?
With silver bells and cockleshells
And pretty maids all in a row

We thought it was about a girl named Mary who liked gardening or something - WRONG.

It is in fact about Mary Tudor, or, more commenly reffered to as Bloody Mary.

Contrary - Means changing things just for the sake of it (Mary Tudor changed Britain back into a Roman Catholic country after her father and her brother changed it into a Protestant way)

How does your Garden Grow? - Mary wanted a baby very badly, but she...

2

cool background

added by 27-5

8

Pedo bear

added by XxKeithHarkinxX

Source: google

4

why do we need school

added by azkaban

Moar Krabs

added by Emo_Kill

cool background

added by 27-5

11

Donkey "Pulling" Cart

added by i_luv_angst

7

My Top 10 Best Female Singing Voices of ALL TIME

posted by KataraLover

I've been planning to do this for a long time and now I'm finally doing it. I have voices of different variety and though some get a lot of criticism but I don't care. To me these women have such jaw dropping voices that never sises to amazing me. I'm going to name the singer, describe why I love her voice so much, and leave a link of where I think their voice sounds the best, whether if it's live, studio, or movie. Please comment and please keep in mind this is just my opinion.

10.Liz Callaway

I've loved her voice ever since I was little and watched her in The Swan Princess, Anastasia,...

1

A Slender Man in Silent Hill.

posted by marksmen456

Pyramid Head Slashing SlenderMan.

The sound of a Large object on the floor,Being dragged in this,Foggy,Ominous place, What was this place? It was Silent Hill, That noise you hearing,Is none other than Pyramid Head, Dragging his sword around,Searching for James. He always does,For he is the Guilt,And the Excecutioner.

The Fog,That,Never ending Fog,It will always be there, But, Something Broke that mist, A tall figure, Wearing a Classical suit, With no face, Having these, Tendrils bursting out of his back. He stood there, In the mist,Alone.

Pyramid Head, Who saw something, Turned, Seeing this, Tall, Slender Man He looked at the...

2

The Short-Lived Micronation of Rose Island

posted by tdafan121

Rose Island before its destruction

-The Republic of Rose Island (Respubliko de la Insulo de la Rozol in Esperanto, the official language of the once-micronation)
-Area: .04 km (4305 sq. ft.)
-Date of foundation: June 24, 1968
-Leader: President Giorgio Rosa
-Language: Esperanto
-Currency: Mill
-Location: Adriatic Sea, between Cesnatico and Rimini, Italy

The Republic of Rose Island (Esperanto: Respubliko de la Insulo de la Rozoj) was a short-lived micronation on a man-made platform in the Adriatic Sea, 11 km (7 mi) off the coast of the province of Forlì, Italy.

In 1967, Italian engineer Giorgio Rosa funded the construction of a 400...

8

some cool funny quotes

posted by lloonny

-Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling.

-The only reason people get lost in thought is because it's unfamiliar territory.

-The road to success is always under construction.

-When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep -- not screaming, like the passengers in his car.

-If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the Up button.

-After twelve years of therapy my psychiatrist said something that brought tears to my eyes. He said, "No hablo ingles."

-Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone...