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3

posted by -Yusha-

Death came to a guy and said: "My friend today is your day."

Guy:"But I'm not ready!"
Then death said,"well your name is the next on my list".

Guy:"Okay why don't you take a seat and I will get you something to eat before we go?".

Then death said,"all right"
The guy gave death some food with sleeping pills in it, death finished eating and fell into a deep sleep.

The guy took the list and removed his name from the top of the list and put it at the bottom of the list.

When death woke up he said to the guy, "Because you have been so nice to me, I will start from the BOTTOM of the list ..."

Moral of the story: - Whatever is written in your destiny ... Will never change no matter how much you try!!

1

Pokemon Theme Lyrics

posted by invadercalliope

I wanna be the very best

Like no one ever was

To catch them is my real test

To train them is my cause

I will travel across the land

Searching far and wide

Teach Pokemon to understand

The power that's inside

Pokemon!

Gotta catch 'em all--

It's you and me

I know it's my destiny

Pokemon!

Ooooh, you're my best friend

In a world we must defend

Pokemon!

Gotta catch 'em all--

Our hearts so true

Our courage will pull us through

You teach me and I'll teach you

Pokemon!

Gotta catch 'em all!

Gotta catch 'em all!

Yeeaa.

Every challenge along the way

With courage I can face

To claim my rightful place

Come with me the time is right...

6

THIS IS FUNNY

posted by jessicamc26

A stoner called the fire department and said, "Come quick my house is on fire!" The Fireman asked "How do we get there?" The stoner says "DUH, the big red truck!"

HAHAHAHAHHA
HAHAHAHAHAA
HAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAA
THIS IS FUNNY
THIS IS FUNNY
HAHAHAHAHHA
HAHAHAHAHAA
HAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAA
THIS IS FUNNY
HAHAHAHAHHA
HAHAHAHAHAA
HHHAHAHAHAHHA
HAHAHAHAHAA
HAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAA
THIS IS FUNNY

THIS IS FUNNYAHAHAHAHHA
HAHAHAHAHAA
HAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAA
THIS IS FUNNY

THIS IS FUNNYAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAA
THIS IS FUNNY

THIS IS FUNNY
THIS IS FUNNY
HAHAHAHAHHA
HAHAHAHAHAA
HAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAA
THIS IS FUNNY

THIS IS FUNNY

THIS IS FUNNY

THIS IS FUNNY

THIS IS FUNNY

THIS IS FUNNY

6

:)

posted by sapherequeen

:)

I just want to take the time to thank everyone here who has known me, been on my side, is a fan of me, cares about me, etc. :)

I appreciate every single person here, and despite my being very moody at times, I will always care for those who feel the same towards me :D

I noticed that I've been very...unpleasant on Fanpop towards some people, and I apologize for that. All I could say was that I was in the Darkest Time of my life, and it consumed me entirely. But now, that will change >:)

I am me again. I love and respect those who have always been there for me, were kind to me, are my fans, and appreciate each and every one of you for the rest of my life :)

I love you all! Have a beautiful, wonderful day :D

-LOL!-

3

Emails to ALice

posted by KatiiCullen94

dear Alice.
i don't know why i say alice anymore, i think now i write these emails to myself, to secure me that you were real, that you all were , that he was.
There is evidence that you were here. and was my best friend. But sometimes i dont know wheither i was dreaming or not, But i stop that thought to think again, if it was a dream and you diddnt exist,then how did i know your name, or did i make you up, along with every one else. Maybe i'm going crazy, from without you i dont know. But i want to find out. Do you think a crazy person can be the one to digiosed themselves?? Lets hope for...

4

Night Surgeon Lyrics

posted by twilight0girl

link

Nathan:
Dear Marni,
I am so sorry.
Can you forgive me for this?

Rotti:
Not the debt doctor
With the hungry scalpel!
Here's my prognosis:
Will they live...?

Hench Girls:
Doubtful.

Luigi:
Your the street physician
carving flesh sculptures!

Pavi:
Paint your ass like rembrandt!
Ha! You Like-a that?!

Rotti:
Better start praying when you see him coming.

Luigi:
cause tonight its curtains!

Luigi, Pavi and Rotti:
Youre the night surgeon!

Chorus:
Remember who you are.

Nathan:
I remember...

Genterns:
Remember what you did to Marni.

Chorus:
Remember who you are.

Nathan:
I remember...

Genterns:
Remember...

1

HelluvaBoss review:

posted by Canada24

link

Sense whatsupbugs reviewed Hazbin, I thought it'll be a fun excuse to re-review Helluva Boss. Back in the day, Viv made two pilots on her channel, both set in hell. And I knew from the beginning this was the one I preferred, the sitcom styled one starring Brandon Rogers and Richard Steven Horvitz.. Yeah that's right, she has Zim..

Like Hazbin, this series is intended for adult audiences. It deals with strong language, sexual content, and violence..

Like all shows, this has both positives and negatives, though the negatives are why I'm reluctant on watching Hazbin. Sense it's the same creator,...

76

more than 100 funny and cute things to say to a girl

posted by bvbmary15

I'm not drunk, I'm just intoxicated by you.
I was so enchanted by your beauty that I ran into that wall over there. So I am going to need your name and number for insurance purposes.
If beauty were time, you'd be eternity.
If I were a stop light, I'd turn red everytime you passed by, just so I could stare at you a bit longer.
Babe, your beauty makes the morning sun look like the dull glimmer of the moon.
You'd better direct that beauty somewhere else, you'll set the carpet on fire.
If I received a nickel for everytime I saw someone as beautiful as you, I'd have five cents.
For a moment I thought I...

73

comebacks after someone says you're gay.

posted by Tamar20

1)"Why, do you find me irresistible?"

2)"No, I just dress better than you"

3)"You're a double gay. No returnsies!"

4)"I love the second grade insults, *insert name here*. Honestly, isn't it strange how "gay" has come to replace "stupid"? And so what if I was gay? Insulting my sexual orientation is pointless.

NOW...if a girl says you're gay, and you actually are, I find the best burn is: "At least I can get a boyfriend."

5)Look them in the face with a deadpan expression. Simply say, "Yes. I'm gay," and walk away. Take their thunder away. It's such a juvenile thing to say in the first place.
Or...

149

61 Things Girls dont know about Guys- this is in a Guys Point of View

posted by milorox18

1. Guys hate sluts even though they have sex with them! (oh yeah..you're not "popular" if you've slept with more than 5 guys..you're a HOE)

2. "Hey, are you busy?" or "Are you doing something?" ~ two phrases guys open with to stop from stammering on the phone.

3... Guys may be flirting around all day but before they go to sleep, they always think about the girl they truly care about.

4. Before they call, guys try to plan out a little about what they're gonna say so there aren't awkward pauses, but once he's on the phone he forgets it all and makes it up as he goes.

5. Guys go crazy over a girl's...

16

Prank Call Ideas!

posted by OmegaLeader

(Found it on the internet thought it was pretty interesting.)

You call your victim and you want to confuse them. No laughing or anything, just a normal voice like someone would call you. Me and my friends do this a lot.

Script:
You call the person...

Person: Hello?
You: Hello?
Person: Uh, hi. Who is this and what do you want?
You: What? Oh no no no no no! It is YOU who is calling me. Ok, so what did YOU need?
Person: No no I didn't call you. You called me. Wait, who is this??
You: NO! I didn't call you! You are the one who called me! Now i ask one more time who are you and why did you call my at this...

9

Random jokes

posted by sakurahanazono

Alpha kenny body

1.)Write down on a piece of paper "Alpha kenny body" and get someone to read it. (it sounds like they're saying I'll fuck anybody xD)

I won a math debate

2.)Write down "I won a math debate" and once again get someone to read it. (It should sound like they're saying I want to masterbate xD)

Eye map ness

3.) Say: Eye
Spell: Map
Say: ness

Write this down on paper and you have to do as instructed on the left. (It sounds like they're saying I'm a penis xD)

Eye Emma rate hard

4.) write down "Eye emma rate hard" down on a piece of paper (it sounds like they're saying I'm a retard)

Eye M egg ay

5.) Say: Eye
Say: M
Say: egg
Say: ay

(It should sound like they're saying I am a gay xD)

32

39 Things to Do to Confuse, Annoy and/or Freak Out Strangers

posted by BeastBoyCahill

1. Walk up to them and ask them for their autographs.
2. Walk up to them, introduce yourself extremely upbeat and friendly-like and end the conversation by saying "It was nice to meet you. It's so cool to talk to people outside of the asylum." Then walk away.
3. While walking down the street, in a mall or any other such place, laugh out loud for no apparent reason. Be as creative with the way you laugh as you wish.
4. Run up to them, excitedly calling them Father, Mother, Aunt or Uncle. If you dare, hug them.
5. While passing a random stranger, stop and exclaim to them, "You have no idea!" in a...

2

DAS ROTE PFERD! (ENGLISH BELOW)

posted by hannah16

Jetzt geht's los Freunde
Hier ist Markus Becker und die Mallorca Cowboys und das rote Pferd

Wir singen zusammen
Da hat das rote Pferd sich einfach umgekehrt
und hat mit seinem Schwanz die Fliege abgewehrt
Die Fliege war nicht dumm,
sie machte summ,summ,summ
Und flog mit viel Gebrumm
um's rote Pferd herum

lalalalalala lalalalalala lalalalalalalalalalalala
lalalalalala lalalalalala lalalalalalalalalalalala

Ok Freunde,
das war nicht schlecht für den Anfang
Aber da geht noch was
Seit ihr gut drauf? Jaaa
Habt ihr lust zu feiern? Jaaa
Dann macht euch bereit und singt mit uns zusammen

Die Fliege...

7

50 Ways To Annoy People

posted by karpach_14

Bored? Need something to spice up your day? Why not annoy the living shit out of someone you love? Here are a few suggestions.

1. Go to the library. Every 15 minutes, go up to the same guy and joke, "Working hard or hardly working?"

2. At the dentist, start screaming as soon as you open your mouth.

3. Stand in front of the TV while your dad is watching a big game.

4. Every 30 minutes or so, call your friend who is babysitting and breathe into the phone.

5. Scrape your ring or your nails on the blackboard next time you're asked to do a problem at the board.

6. Next concert you go to, yell out "Mmmbop!"...

NikPiks - Arin Hanson: The Man Who Became Too Woke

posted by Windwakerguy430

Famous Newgrounds content creator, also known as Arin Hanson from the let’s play channel Game Grumps, was once a prolific animator and considered one of the biggest. If you don’t know Arin as an animator, you’d be forgiven for that. Arin Hanson’s old career has been buried and forgotten, but hey, times change right…. Right…. Right?! Hello, boys and girls. Welcome to another episode of Content Cop. Idubbbz here with the new rant article. I ranted before about David Cage and his creeping abilities, but now it’s time to talk about something else. It’s time to hit closer to home....

1

Five Nights At Freddy's 3 Rap Song!

posted by deathding

A swift lunge at your soul but it's all in the mind
If you want to stuff me in a suit I'm sure you'll find
That the things that'll creep ya are sure to beat ya
Got to stay alive or they're going to meet ya

10 Rooms 5 vents and no doors at all
Not even a flashlight and no time to stall
Delay for a moment and through the vents they'll crawl
Almost dead, every sound I dread, and I see him in the hall.

YOYOYOYO WHAT'S UP BRO!?
YOU'RE THE NEW GUY, HIGH FIVE, TOO SLOW!
JUST LIVE FIVE NIGHTS, EACH ONE'S DIFFICULTY'S GREATER
YOU GOT THE BASICS DUDE, ALRIGHT SEE YOU LATER!

So night one, here we go,...

3

Search Me

posted by nmdis

"Search Me"

Through this skin you see
My heart
Through this laughter you feel
My pain
Even through this mask you see
My face
For You are the only one who really knows just who I am

And you search me
And you know all the secrets of my heart
And you search me
Revealing the mysteries of who You are
You search me

Growing up never comes
Easily
In Your hands, You're the potter
Molding me
Then why do I wear this mask and play this game
Of hide and seek
When You are the only one who really knows just who I am

And you search me
And you know all the secrets of my heart
And you search me
Revealing the...

4

A LOGICAL SOLUTION.

posted by Wendy99

Now here is a problem that finally has a formula for getting to the bottom of an age old problem.
From a strictly mathematical viewpoint it goes like this:

What Makes 100%? What does it mean to give MORE than 100%? Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%? We have all been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over 100%. How about achieving 103%? What makes up 100% in life?

Here's a little mathematical formula that might help you answer these questions:

If:
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z is represented as:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13...

4

Weirdest Omegle Conversation I've Ever Had

posted by 214

You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

You: meow

You: meow

You: meow

You: meow

You: meow

You: meow

You: meow

You: meow

You: meow

You: meow

You: meow

You: meow

You: meow

Stranger: WOOF

Stranger: WOOF

Stranger: WOOF

Stranger: WOOF

You: meow

You: meow

You: meow

Stranger: WOOF

You: meow

Stranger: WOOF

You: meow

You: NOT ANOTHER DOG! O_O

Stranger: HAHAHAHAHHAHAH!!!!!!!!!!! 8D

You: YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KITTEN ME. T_T

Stranger: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHA I SEE WHAT YOU DID THERE!!! KI FUCKING SAW IT!!!! 8D

You: O_O

You: I AM A MAGICAL CAT.

Stranger: ZALDGFALDGASDFALDFGALDSFGASDA OH MY GOD. IM A MAGICAL BURRITO. WANNA...