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chapter 1 discovery

"what should we do today Teki?" Kiely asked her tiny dog. Knowing that the dog couldn't posibly respond in any other way than wagging her tail or bark and that is exactly what the dog did.
Kiely sat next to her chihuahua and ran her hand down her back feeling her soft black and brown fur."your a good baby girl" she crooned at the little puppy.
"Lets go to the park and then we could go to fred's,"Kiely finally desided Teki was still wagging her tail. Kiely made her way to the bathroom to freshen up and take a shower. She got out of the shower and headed toward the mirror to see if she had any inperfection like a zit or a pimpol, she had nothing the same as always. Kiely took out her hair drier and started doing her strait brown hair. She put on make up and dressed up in her brand new skinny jeans and a baby blue blouse her aunt bought her last week.
She went to have breakfest with her brothers.
"So sis what is the plan for today?"asked Joe the oldest brother, who has just graduated from UF and he is now an engineer.
"Not much I'm just going to take Teki out for a walk around the park and then we're going to a friend's,"Kiely said as she finished eating her pancakes. "Bye," she waved goodbye to her brothers and she went out the door and to the park.
On her way to the park she ran into many people she knew she greeted them all with a big smile. Kiely made it to the park, found a nice spot to sit while Teki played with the other dogs.
She could sense ther was something wrong that day, but she did not know what. Suddenly there was a large bang the ground moved and flashes of red light going all thruogh the park followed by a ear pircing high piched noice. Kiely called Teki to her side and went to see what was going on because no one seemed to notice the ground moving , the light , the bang or even the high pitched noice other than Kiely and the dogs .
Teki obidiantly came to Kiely's side and she grabbed the little dog and went to where the high pitched sound seemed to be comming from.
She got to the part of the park that was more like a forest no one ever went in there, only on hikes but other wise people didn't go in there. Kiely was afraid as a child and a little scared right now, but something inside of her pushed her forward so she took in a deep breath and entered the forest. She was walking for a long time but after 30 minutes she heard a man yell in pain and she went running to see what happened.
At last she came across a field with purple and yellow flowers there was no a tree for miles. There where young men fighting a red headed woman holding a blue-green sphere in her hand. She was zapping the men with it not moving from the spot. Kiely steped closer to see beter, but she tripped and this cought the woman`s attention because Teki was yapping.
The woman turned around to glare at the poor girl her green eyes piercing she said something in some forighn language, a beem of light came out of the sphere towards Kiely the girl still oon the floor grabbed her dog and put her behind her arm. She covered her face with her left hand but her right hand was out with her palm facing the fierece woman she waited for something to happen but nothing did. So she looked up an she was in a pink bubble which sourse was her right hand.
Kiely looked up at the woman who tried to harm her. the red-head looked just as shocked as Kiely was. Then she saw all the men's faces for the first time they where all god-like in there own way they where all tall and muscular.
One had curly dark brown hair that bilds on its self like an afro and dark green eyes he had hard features. The one next to him looked a lot like him but he had bigger brown eyes and lighter hair. There was an other one farther along but still part of the group he had glasses was blond and had light green eyes the other two looked like twins they both had the same features, black strait hair,and blue eyes. They where all handsom it was hard to deside who was the most beutiful, but Kiely desided that it was the one with the brown hair.
One of twins went running towards the woman with a soward in his hand and killed the austauned woman with no worning there was black and purple smoke coming out of her instead of blood.
The man with the dark brown hair came to Kiely and gave her his hand to help her up. "Hey are you okay?" he asked as Kiely took his hand and he helped her up.
"Yeah, I think," she checked herself for injuries or bleeding, nothing."My name is Kiely by the way who are you guys?"
The man smiled, "my name is Emmit this is my brother Rick we are in charge of magic potions" he gestured the man that looked like him then he gestured the twins, "they are Luke and Anton" they nodded when they heard there names"you probibly have noticed they are twins they are in charge of combat" and he gestured the last man " and this is Brad he knows every thing about magical creatures, monsters and witches"
"Wait, wait, wait!," Kiely's head was spinning, " you are talking about magic! pixis, witches and all that fairy tail stuff?"
"Yeah, well you should know you are a fairy" said brad.
"Are you sure?" after what just happened it was hard for Kiely not to belive them.
"ofcourse only fairys can produce pink magic and forse field and such, out of there fairy form," he asured me "try to change into a fairy"
"Uhh okay" Kiely closed her eyes and willed her whole being to change suddenly she felt it her body was tinglely and she could feel the whait of big wingson her back she looked down and there was a beutiful gaun where her clother were and she could feel her wings fluter, "wow", that was the only sound that that would exit her lips.
She looked over to Teki that was shaking with her tail between her legs, she was terified. She bent down to grab her dog, "there, there baby, its mommy".
"What is that?" asked one of the twins steping closer.
"This is Teki my dog,"Kiely told him,"where are you guys from any way?"
"We are all from the great land of Beltmorent its from an other dimention,"said Rick.
"How did you get here?"Kiely asked.
"Portal, what to come back with us just for a little while?"asked Emmit.
"Sure," the girl said , "but Teki can come right?"
"Yeah,"said Rick and then he pulled a quilt from his pocket and put it on the floor it looked like a pool "ladies first."
Kiely grabed tight to Teki and jumped in the portal.
DEMENTED POEMS

Roses are crap
Violets are shit
Sit on my face
And wiggle a bit

Roses are stupid
Violets are silly
Grease up your flaps
Cuz here comes my willy

Roses are awful
Violets are the pits
Lift up your shirt
And show me your tits

Roses make me laugh
Violets make me titter
You're a dirty bitch
And you love it up the shitter

Roses are straight
Violets are twisted
Bend over love
You're about to get fisted

Roses are crap
Violets are wanky
Oooh I've just cum
Pass me a hanky

Roses are red
It's elementary
Let's ring your best friend
And try double entry

Roses are shit
Violets are crap
Show me your clit
And I'll cum in your lap

Roses are red
Skidmarks are brown
Give me a blow job
And swallow it down

Roses are groovy
Violets are funky
I'm thinking of you
And spanking my monkey
1. At the movies: When you meet acquaintances/ friends.. .
Stupid Question:-
Hey, what are you doing here?
Answer:-
Dont u know, I sell tickets in black over here..

2. In the bus: A heavy lady wearing pointed high-heeled shoes steps on your feet…
Stupid Question:-
Sorry, did that hurt?
Answer:-
No, not at all, I’m on local anesthesia.. …why don’t you try again.

3. At a funeral: One of the teary-eyed people ask…
Stupid Question:-
Why, why him, of all people.
Answer:-
Why? Would it rather have been you?

4. At a restaurant: When you ask the waiter
Stupid Question:-
Is ! the “Butter Paneer Masala”...
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added by adultswimperson
Source: Google
I found this hilarious article on pcworld.com
Don't know who the author is, but he's funny.

1. Backward Thinking
"I sold my only car to help pay for gas money, but now gas has come down in price. How do I get my car back?"
I tried to contact this guy, but it turns out that he also sold his computer to help pay for his Internet connection.

2. It's Caps Lock--Capisce?
"HOW DO I TURN OFF CAPSLOCK? I ACCIDENTALLY TURNED IT ON YESTERDAY AND I DONT KNOW HOW TO TURN IT BACK OFF."
Note to self: Register howtoturnoffcapslock.com; make millions.

3. Credit Crunch
"I wanted to see if my computer would read my...
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posted by Sheetal1256
Here are some funny New Year's resolutions for 2012...
I will think of a password other than "password" or "hello".

I will not tell the same story at every get together.

I won't worry so much.

I will cut my hair.

I will grow my hair.

I will stop considering other people's feelings when they so obviously don't consider mine - if that unwashed fellow sits next to me again, I'll tell him he stinks!

I will be more imaginative.

I will not bore my boss by with the same excuse for taking leaves. I will think of some more excuses.

I will do less laundry and use more deodorant.

I will avoid taking a bath whenever...
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Give my regards to broadway. o-O

*Insert epic theme song here*

Alright, I'm pretty sure we all know who Spongebob is. The show was a funny, crazy, and inventive kids show that pretty much EVERYBODY ALIVE has at least heard of.

The show had memorable characters, funny comedy that everyone can enjoy, and.......

CHOCOLAAAAAAAAAATEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!! ^____^

But one of my favorite parts of the show was the songs, and today we're counting down the best of them!

BECAUSE NOBODY CAN SING BETTER THAN A TALKING SPONGE. ;D

#10. Striped Sweater!

link

Shots fired.

Seriously, this is EASILY the stupidest song on this...
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added by Juilet1234
posted by Usui--takumi
Why was Tigger looking in the bowl??
He was trying to find pooh.
There were three men on an airplane, one of them decides to bring a baby.There is a crash and only three parachutes so they leave the baby behind. When they get to the bottom they hear screaming. They find the baby on the ground. The dad of the baby says, '' How did you get down here? ''. The baby replies, '' Me not dumb, me not silly, me hold on to daddy's willy!''
What's black and white, black and white, black and white?
A penguin rolling down a hill.
Yo momma so fat, when she jumps her own boobs slap her.
Yo momma so dumb AND fat,...
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posted by Shelly_McShelly
Welcome to The Weakest Link.

Here is a very simple little test comprised of four questions to determine the level of your intellect. Your replies must be spontaneous and immediate, with no deliberating or wasting time.

And NO CHEATING. On your mark, set....GO!!!

1: You are competing in a race, and overtake the runner in second place.
In which position are you now?

Answer:

If you answered that you're now coming first then you're completely wrong. You overtook the second runner and took their place, therefore you're coming second.

For the next question try not to be so dumb.

2 : If you overtake the last...
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posted by Shelly_McShelly
a boy was asked by his teacher to pick some spelling words for his homework. the boy goes home and asks his mum "what's a good spelling word?" and the mother replies " Shutup, i'm busy", so he writes it down.
he goes to his dad and asks "whats a good spelling word?" and the dad replies "da na na na Batman!" so he writes it down.
next he goes to his older sister and asks "whats a good spelling word?" and she replies "yeah yeah" so the boy writes it down.
he goes to his younger sister and asks "whats a good spelling word?" and she replies "lollipop, lollipop" so he writes it down.
Finally he goes...
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posted by invadercalliope
•Everyone in this place is unhappy. And since they're unhappy, they're probably looking for someone worse off than they are.
•You know who isn't human? You know who isn't human?! PEOPLE LIKE YOU!
•Up to this day, I've never killed a single human.
•You will never see me again.
•I was going to let you go; after all, there aren't many of us out there, but you're just such a pain in the ass.
•Please forget about everything.
•Are you enjoying this?
Kouta: "I thought we were friends."

Lucy: "We are friends, that's why you're still alive."

Kouta: "You killed my father, Kanae.. and my sister Kanae... For that I will never forgive you."
Lucy: "All this time, I've lived in hope of telling you how sorry I am, I've fought armies, just to have this chance, but now, there's nothing I can say that's good enough."

Kurama: "Regret is the domain of those who have earned the right to look back on the past. All I have is shame."
The End
What's your personality type?

Picks/Polls
link, link, link, link, link, link, link, link, link, link
link

(E) Extrovert
-Tend to focus on the outer world of people and the external environment
-Like variety and action
-Often impatient with long, slow jobs
-Are interested in the activities of their work and in how other people do it
-Often act quickly, sometimes without thinking
-Develop ideas by discussion
-Like to learn new task by talking it through with someone
-Need to experience the world in order to understand it and thus tend to like action

(I) Introverts
-Focus more on their own inner world,...
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Okay so if you live on the eastcoast u are probably getting used to the snow..........so even if u aren't, everybody has the problem of having nothing to do when it snows but sled. So these are a few of the things that i enjoy to do.........hehe!

1. Fill balloons with water. Then leave them outside overnight.............yeah i'm this stupid. The next day, cut the balloons off and you got.........AN ICE BALL!! (i usually make like 15) Then use them to pay dodgeball. This is especially fun to do in deep snow, when you can barely move as it is. Technically, u could use them to do various things,...
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… So YIIK is a game



Okay, so a lot of you, or hell, all of you are probably asking, “Nik, what the fuck are you doing this time?” All two of you that read these will know that I have talked about this game almost a year ago on the short lived In-Indie subseries I do, where I mildly praised the game despite how it is. This was around when the game was relatively new and didn’t have much attention aside from the mixed reviews that it had gotten. That is, until a few months later when so much came out about this game. It wasn’t long before YIIK: A Postmodern RPG became pretty much...
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Shin Megami Tensei III: Nocturne, known in other regions as Shin Megami Tensei: Lucifer’s Call, is the “third” game in the SMT franchise. And I say third with quotes because any SMT fans will tell you that’s bullshit. The third in the mainline franchise, yes, but SMT has had several spin offs and franchises all from the Shin Megami Tensei titles alone. Hell, one of them that you may know, and the reason why you are reading this article right now to yell at me over, is the Persona franchise. Persona is part of the same series, but vastly different. Persona is a game that is about the...
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added by zanhar1
added by TheLefteris24
posted by scarletunicorn
So, this started out as a small little thing between AudreyFreak and me, but I'd thought it'd be good for us to comment on characters we don't like and don't care for, and maybe it'd be good to explain, even those characters that are glorified by the fandom but have overall massive problems in general.

So, let's go!

Margery Tyrell (Game of Thrones).

AF- Unlike her less developed but actually likable book counterpart, TV Margaery (or “Marge Boleyn”, as some say, which I love) has no redeeming qualities whatsoever. She’s essentially a glorified prom queen who just lives to cattily pick on...
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Let's fuckin do this
Let's fuckin do this
Well, the first episode has a whopping SEVENTEEN fans now, which is my most popular article to date, so I guess a lot of you wanted a sequel. Hope you guys enjoy, sorry it took so long to happen. XD

"How to compliment a guy."

It's not that hard, just say something nice. Do you REALLY need advice from the internet on something so INSANELY simple such as this?

"Fries insulted me!"

You insult humanity, it's a pretty fair trade to me.

"Paul's Empire."

DANCE my minions, DANCE! >:D

"What does astroglide smell like?"

Fresh flowers, unless the lubricant has been used after masturbating, in which case a...
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added by 3xZ