If women ruled the world
.Men would sit around and wonder what WE were thinking.
.Women with cold hands would give men prostate exams.
.PMS would be a legitimate defense in court.
.Men would get reputations for sleeping around.
.Singles bars would have metal detectors to weed out men hiding wedding rings in there pockets.
.A man would no longer be considered a "good catch" simply because he is breathing.
.Fewer women would be dieting because their ideal weight standard would increase by 40 pounds.
.Shopping would be considered an aerobic activity.
."Ms." magazine would have an annual swimsuit issue featuring scantily clad male models.
.Men would not be allowed to eat gas-producing food within two hours of bed time.
.Men would be secretaries for female bosses,working twice as hard for none of the credit.
.Little girls would read "snow white and the seven hunks".
.Men would bring drinks,chips and dip to women watching soap operas.
.Men would HAVE to get play boy for the articles,because there would be no pictures.
.Men would learn phrases like:"I'm sorry","I love you","your beautiful","of course you don't look fat in that outfit".
.Men would be judged entirely by their looks,women by their accomplishments (I don't really like that one but I'm going to put it anyway).
.Men would pay as much attention to their women as there car.
.All toilet seats would be nailed down.
.Men would work on their relationships as much as they work on their careers.
.TV new segments on sports would never run longer than 1 minute.
.All men would be forced to spend one month in a PMS simulator.
.During mid-life crisis,men would get hot-flashes and women would date 19-year-olds.
.Overweight men would have their weight brought to their attention constantly.
.After a baby is born,men would take a six-week paternity leave to wait on their wives hand and foot.
.For basic training,solders would have to take care of a two-year old for six weeks.
see now wouldn't things be so much easier if women ran the world.
*i didn't write this,just so you know*
.Men would sit around and wonder what WE were thinking.
.Women with cold hands would give men prostate exams.
.PMS would be a legitimate defense in court.
.Men would get reputations for sleeping around.
.Singles bars would have metal detectors to weed out men hiding wedding rings in there pockets.
.A man would no longer be considered a "good catch" simply because he is breathing.
.Fewer women would be dieting because their ideal weight standard would increase by 40 pounds.
.Shopping would be considered an aerobic activity.
."Ms." magazine would have an annual swimsuit issue featuring scantily clad male models.
.Men would not be allowed to eat gas-producing food within two hours of bed time.
.Men would be secretaries for female bosses,working twice as hard for none of the credit.
.Little girls would read "snow white and the seven hunks".
.Men would bring drinks,chips and dip to women watching soap operas.
.Men would HAVE to get play boy for the articles,because there would be no pictures.
.Men would learn phrases like:"I'm sorry","I love you","your beautiful","of course you don't look fat in that outfit".
.Men would be judged entirely by their looks,women by their accomplishments (I don't really like that one but I'm going to put it anyway).
.Men would pay as much attention to their women as there car.
.All toilet seats would be nailed down.
.Men would work on their relationships as much as they work on their careers.
.TV new segments on sports would never run longer than 1 minute.
.All men would be forced to spend one month in a PMS simulator.
.During mid-life crisis,men would get hot-flashes and women would date 19-year-olds.
.Overweight men would have their weight brought to their attention constantly.
.After a baby is born,men would take a six-week paternity leave to wait on their wives hand and foot.
.For basic training,solders would have to take care of a two-year old for six weeks.
see now wouldn't things be so much easier if women ran the world.
*i didn't write this,just so you know*
1.Blood
2.Broken bones
3.Needles
4.Surgery.
5.Anything gross
6.injurys
7.YOU!!!(just kidding!)
8.People being run over
9.People getting their head cut off
10.umm....
11.Death
12.other people getting sick
13.someone in pain
do not try to make me faint using these ways becuse i will also puke everywhere and you don't want to see that.i faint when i get teeth pulled...........PIE!!!!!!! thats all i want to write but it will be to short and won't publish but it should now.maybe not pie! cake!yummy
2.Broken bones
3.Needles
4.Surgery.
5.Anything gross
6.injurys
7.YOU!!!(just kidding!)
8.People being run over
9.People getting their head cut off
10.umm....
11.Death
12.other people getting sick
13.someone in pain
do not try to make me faint using these ways becuse i will also puke everywhere and you don't want to see that.i faint when i get teeth pulled...........PIE!!!!!!! thats all i want to write but it will be to short and won't publish but it should now.maybe not pie! cake!yummy
just to let you know, i didn't write any of these and i'm only posting them cos i saw it and thought it was funny
1. So your daughter's a hooker,
and it spoiled your day...
Look at the bright side,
she's a really good lay.
2. My tire was thumping....
I thought it was flat....
when I looked at the tire....
I noticed your cat... Sorry
3. You had your bladder removed
and you're on the mends....
here's a bouquet of flowers
and a box of Depends.
4. You've announced that you're gay,
won't that be a laugh,
when they find out you're one
of the Joint Chiefs of Staff.
5. Happy Vasectomy!
Hope you feel zippy!
Cause when I had mine
I got really snippy.
6. Heard your wife left you...
How upset you must be...
But don't fret about it ....
She moved in with me
7. Your computer is dead...
it was once so alive
Don't you regret
installing Windows 95?
8. You totaled your car...
and can't remember why...
could it have been...
that case of Bud Dry?
1. So your daughter's a hooker,
and it spoiled your day...
Look at the bright side,
she's a really good lay.
2. My tire was thumping....
I thought it was flat....
when I looked at the tire....
I noticed your cat... Sorry
3. You had your bladder removed
and you're on the mends....
here's a bouquet of flowers
and a box of Depends.
4. You've announced that you're gay,
won't that be a laugh,
when they find out you're one
of the Joint Chiefs of Staff.
5. Happy Vasectomy!
Hope you feel zippy!
Cause when I had mine
I got really snippy.
6. Heard your wife left you...
How upset you must be...
But don't fret about it ....
She moved in with me
7. Your computer is dead...
it was once so alive
Don't you regret
installing Windows 95?
8. You totaled your car...
and can't remember why...
could it have been...
that case of Bud Dry?
Yeah,this is the first article I've written,so it probably won't be good.
O.K I have a 7 year old niece and she might not seem evil,but trust me she is.If you met her you'd think she was a sweet,little angel
Her mom,my sis Heather,got married a few years ago.Well the man she married had 2 kids.Ever since she lived with them,she's been evil.
She tells my mom No
She tells us she hates us.She thinks she's the boss.She hits me and then says I hit her first(i'm old enough to know you don't hit when you don't get what you want)She calls me fat.she can't take a joke and then says im fat and don't "play"because I don't like being outside and hate sports.There's more but I don't really want to write anymore.Tell me what you think in comments please:)
O.K I have a 7 year old niece and she might not seem evil,but trust me she is.If you met her you'd think she was a sweet,little angel
Her mom,my sis Heather,got married a few years ago.Well the man she married had 2 kids.Ever since she lived with them,she's been evil.
She tells my mom No
She tells us she hates us.She thinks she's the boss.She hits me and then says I hit her first(i'm old enough to know you don't hit when you don't get what you want)She calls me fat.she can't take a joke and then says im fat and don't "play"because I don't like being outside and hate sports.There's more but I don't really want to write anymore.Tell me what you think in comments please:)
1. Write a new article on this website
2.Draw a snow wolf
3.Go to the library
4. Call a friend and go on a walk with them
5. Have a dance party
6. Listen to music and "scream sing"
7. Clean your house (That might get boring though)
8. Paint Your room
9. Go to the park
10. Call a friend or two and do the yoga challenge
11. Decorate the house
12. Watch YouTube
13. Watch FRIENDS The TV Series
14. Go on google and search weird things
15. Learn to juggle
16. Go to an elevator and annoy random people (this could get you kicked out but its super fun)
17. Go shopping
18. Go skating
19. Play a board game
20. Sleep!
21. Bake food
22. Exercise
23. Read
24. Hike
25. Garden
26. Sugar Cookies
27. life size candy land
28. Paint snow
2.Draw a snow wolf
3.Go to the library
4. Call a friend and go on a walk with them
5. Have a dance party
6. Listen to music and "scream sing"
7. Clean your house (That might get boring though)
8. Paint Your room
9. Go to the park
10. Call a friend or two and do the yoga challenge
11. Decorate the house
12. Watch YouTube
13. Watch FRIENDS The TV Series
14. Go on google and search weird things
15. Learn to juggle
16. Go to an elevator and annoy random people (this could get you kicked out but its super fun)
17. Go shopping
18. Go skating
19. Play a board game
20. Sleep!
21. Bake food
22. Exercise
23. Read
24. Hike
25. Garden
26. Sugar Cookies
27. life size candy land
28. Paint snow