Lord of the Rings

1. Mess up his hair

2. Take him on a blind date with a dwarf woman.

3. Hide his hairbrushes

4. Throw feathers on him and run away.

5. Tie him to a chair and make him listen to Elrond singing in the shower *shudders*

6. Curl his hair

7. Clip his ears

8. Hide his hair products

9. Give them back to him but only after you've replaced his shampoo with red dye

10. Challenge him to an "Elvish Song" contest, and pick the song with the longest verses for him to sing

11. Call him "Igor" for a day

12. Tie him to a tree and leave him there. Then smear honey in his hair

13. Sing "Secret, ELVISH MAN, secret, ELVISH...

On the first day of Christmas a wizard gave to me, one ring to rule them all.
On the second day of Christmas a wizard gave to me, two sons of Gondor and one ring to rule them all.
On the third day of Christmas a wizard gave to me, three lembas bread, two sons of Gondor and one ring to rule them all.
On the fourth day of Christmas a wizard gave to me, four little hobbits, three lembas bread, two sons of Gondor and one ring to rule them all.
On the fifth day of Christmas a wizard gave to me, five undead Wraiths, four little hobbits, three lembas bread, two sons of Gondor and one ring to rule them...

Okay, so this is a fic me and my friend wrote ages ago. No actually it's just some 5 years or so, but you know what I mean. Its English is just awful, 5 years ago we spoke (and especially wrote) a very very bad English full of various kinds of mistakes. I'm sorry about that in advance, but this is so stupid, and yet such a wonderful memory of mine too, I have to post it.. Hope you'll enjoy, or at least have a laugh at some parts. Here we go..

Of grass and stewed rabbit, that is how to smuggle drugs inside of dead rabbits?

Elrond: Elves and Men both have been living hard times recently. As for...