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Hogwarts Houses
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Harry woke with a start as Teddy’s cries pierced the small room. He groggily climbed out of the warm bed and stumbled over to the bassinet by the window. In the moonlight he could see that Teddy’s hair was bright pink. Chuckling to himself, he lifted the baby out of the crib and started over to the rocking chair.
He fed Teddy some warm milk.He stopped crying. Harry smiled,and Teddy smiled back.Harry put him back in the crib.Instantly Teddy fell asleep.
1. You've read the books more times than Hermione has aced an exam.

2. You've learned another language just so you didn't have to wait a few months for the book to be translated into your native tongue.

3. You have permanently tattooed Harry Potter iconography onto your body.

4. You have played Quidditch ... not in a video game ... in real life.

5. You have been stocking up with tissues for months in anticipation of the final book in the series, “Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows.”

6. There is a room in your house that looks like it belongs in Hogwarts.
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posted by SwarlsBarkley
Compiled from the Twitter contest held by @nerdist.

JanetVarney: Yo momma so fat the Sorting Hat put her in all four houses

chris8675309: Yo mamma so stupid, she thinks Sirius Black is the soul station on satellite radio

sarazafar: Yo mama so fat she tried to eat Cornelius Fudge

dino_rider: Yo mama’s so ugly the Dementor’s Kiss was swapped out for a hearty handshake and a promise to give her a call sometime.

bradheintz: Yo mama so nasty, Dobby wouldn’t take her sock

Burnaway: Yo momma so skanky, even her patronus got knocked up

chompychomp: Yo mama so stupid, she drowned in a pensieve

Dick_M:...
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