"BOATS AND HOES!"
"For a second there, I thought you were a unicorn".
"Your singing is like a mix of jesus and Fergie!"
"I feel like a lightning bolt just struck the end of my penui*."
"Yeah you would like that wouldnt you fa****?!"
"What if I come out of the shower, and she sees this young calf, and starts to not like the old bull, and takes a look at my chest pubes, all the way down to my froball?"
"Shut the **** up Dale!"
"He better not get in my face, or I'll drop that mother******."
I've got a lucious v of hair going from my chest pubes to my ball fro.
You don't even look good when your singing...Okay, I'm gonna save it with this solo.
I like to have fresh fruit in the house and chocolate chips in my pancakes, write it down so you don't forget.
I didn't want salmon, I said it 4 times!! This wedding is bulls***!!!
For a minute there he had the strangest look in his eyes and I really thought he was gonna rape me, then he said... lets get it on.
Dad, are you f****** kidding me, it's shark week!!
I'm gonna fill up a pillow case with bars of soap and beat the s*** out of you with it.
I've been called the songbird of my generation.
I've got them from the 70's, 80's, & 90's... It's like masturbating in a time machine.
Robert: "Alright everybody. Sleeping arrangement--Brennan, you're going to be sharing a room with Dale. Just until the two of you get job and you move out."
Dale: [whispers] "Hey, are you awake?"
Brennan: [whispers] "Yeah."
Dale: [whispers] "I hate your guts."
Brennan: [whispers] "As soon as your eyes shut I oughta punch you square in the face."
Dale: "This is the one rule of the house. Don't EVER touch my drumset. DON'T TOUCH IT!"
Brennan: "Alright!"
[from trailer]
[Brennan plays on drumset]
Dale: "Did you touch my drumset?"
Brennan: "Nope."
Dale: "Why are you so sweaty?"
Brennan: "I was watching cops."
Nancy: "I think they are starting to like each other."
[Brennan hits Dale on the head, he falls back into a hole. Brennan shovels dirt ontop of him.]
Dale: "What are you doing?!?"
Brennan: "I'm burying you."
Dale: [crying] "I'm alive Brennan, I'm alive."
Brennan: "You're waking the neighbors! Shut up!"
Dale: "OK, name your favorite dinosaur?"
Brennan and Dale: "Philosoraptor."
Brennan: "Alright. If you were a chick, whose the one guy you would sleep with?" Brennan and Dale: "John Stamos."
Dale: "WHAT?!?"
Brennan: "Did we just become best friends?"
Dale: "YEP!"
Robert: "You have one month to find jobs, you're on your asses."
Brennan and Dale: "WHAT?"
Robert: "I'll arrange interviews and you will go!"
Interviewer: "Whose this gentleman sitting behind you?"
Dale: [peeks from behind Brennan] "Hello Miss Lady!"
Interviewer: "You can't..."
Brennan: "Shu... shut your mouth."
Interviewer: "You shouldn't tell the person who is interviewing you to shut their mouth."
Brennan: "You're sounding stupid now."
Interviewer: "I'm sorry, what did you just say?"
Brennan: "You're just coming off stupid."
Interviewer: "Please leave this office."
Brennan: "Do we get any sort of souvenir?"
Interviewer: "GET OUT OF MY OFFICE!"
Dale: [to parents] "Can we turn our beds into bunkbeds?"
Brennan: [pleading] "It'll give us so much extra space in our room to do activities."
Robert: "You're adults, you can do what you want."
Dale: "This is the funnest night ever!"
"Haha, thats so funny, last time i heard that joke i laughed so hard i fell off my dinosaur!"
"Sticks and stones may brake my bones, but im gonna kick you repeatedly in the balls"
"For a second there, I thought you were a unicorn".
"Your singing is like a mix of jesus and Fergie!"
"I feel like a lightning bolt just struck the end of my penui*."
"Yeah you would like that wouldnt you fa****?!"
"What if I come out of the shower, and she sees this young calf, and starts to not like the old bull, and takes a look at my chest pubes, all the way down to my froball?"
"Shut the **** up Dale!"
"He better not get in my face, or I'll drop that mother******."
I've got a lucious v of hair going from my chest pubes to my ball fro.
You don't even look good when your singing...Okay, I'm gonna save it with this solo.
I like to have fresh fruit in the house and chocolate chips in my pancakes, write it down so you don't forget.
I didn't want salmon, I said it 4 times!! This wedding is bulls***!!!
For a minute there he had the strangest look in his eyes and I really thought he was gonna rape me, then he said... lets get it on.
Dad, are you f****** kidding me, it's shark week!!
I'm gonna fill up a pillow case with bars of soap and beat the s*** out of you with it.
I've been called the songbird of my generation.
I've got them from the 70's, 80's, & 90's... It's like masturbating in a time machine.
Robert: "Alright everybody. Sleeping arrangement--Brennan, you're going to be sharing a room with Dale. Just until the two of you get job and you move out."
Dale: [whispers] "Hey, are you awake?"
Brennan: [whispers] "Yeah."
Dale: [whispers] "I hate your guts."
Brennan: [whispers] "As soon as your eyes shut I oughta punch you square in the face."
Dale: "This is the one rule of the house. Don't EVER touch my drumset. DON'T TOUCH IT!"
Brennan: "Alright!"
[from trailer]
[Brennan plays on drumset]
Dale: "Did you touch my drumset?"
Brennan: "Nope."
Dale: "Why are you so sweaty?"
Brennan: "I was watching cops."
Nancy: "I think they are starting to like each other."
[Brennan hits Dale on the head, he falls back into a hole. Brennan shovels dirt ontop of him.]
Dale: "What are you doing?!?"
Brennan: "I'm burying you."
Dale: [crying] "I'm alive Brennan, I'm alive."
Brennan: "You're waking the neighbors! Shut up!"
Dale: "OK, name your favorite dinosaur?"
Brennan and Dale: "Philosoraptor."
Brennan: "Alright. If you were a chick, whose the one guy you would sleep with?" Brennan and Dale: "John Stamos."
Dale: "WHAT?!?"
Brennan: "Did we just become best friends?"
Dale: "YEP!"
Robert: "You have one month to find jobs, you're on your asses."
Brennan and Dale: "WHAT?"
Robert: "I'll arrange interviews and you will go!"
Interviewer: "Whose this gentleman sitting behind you?"
Dale: [peeks from behind Brennan] "Hello Miss Lady!"
Interviewer: "You can't..."
Brennan: "Shu... shut your mouth."
Interviewer: "You shouldn't tell the person who is interviewing you to shut their mouth."
Brennan: "You're sounding stupid now."
Interviewer: "I'm sorry, what did you just say?"
Brennan: "You're just coming off stupid."
Interviewer: "Please leave this office."
Brennan: "Do we get any sort of souvenir?"
Interviewer: "GET OUT OF MY OFFICE!"
Dale: [to parents] "Can we turn our beds into bunkbeds?"
Brennan: [pleading] "It'll give us so much extra space in our room to do activities."
Robert: "You're adults, you can do what you want."
Dale: "This is the funnest night ever!"
"Haha, thats so funny, last time i heard that joke i laughed so hard i fell off my dinosaur!"
"Sticks and stones may brake my bones, but im gonna kick you repeatedly in the balls"
