(I accidentally took down the first version of this, so I had to rewrite it. Sorry.)
“Mordecai!” a familiar voice called. The blue jay looked up from his coffee and saw a very exited racoon running down the stairs towards him.
“Oh, hi Rigby.”
Rigby sat down. “Guess what?” he said, barely holding in his excitement. “Your brother’s coming to stay for the summer break!”
“Brother?”
“Ray? Don’t you remember? He runs Jokeinators, dude!”
“What? Why the hell is that freak coming?”
“I thought you liked him.”
“Duh. No.”
“He’s your brother! Come on dude, he’s awesome!”
“He’s also a snob and a freak.”
“Firstly, Ray is not a snob. You’re just jealous of hi- OOF!”
Mordecai had punched him.
“Dude, what was that for?”
“You know what that was for.”
“Look, it’s not like he’s going to reject you. I mean, just because he runs the most successful joke company in the world and you- OW! Stop it!”
Mordecai had hit him again. “Why did you invite him?!”
“I didn’t invite him.” Rigby protested. “Benson invited him.”
“Great. Now we’re going to have that walking disaster ruining our summer!”
“Dude, he got over his condition now!” Rigby decided to change the subject. “So, why are you here? You don’t usually come at this time of day.”
“I’m going to try and ask Margaret out.”
“Dude, she has a boyfriend.”
“I can fix that.”
“You can’t fix anything.”
“Oh? I can’t fix anything? You’re the one who got us stuck in the meat locker. AND you almost burned us alive when you tried to fix that stupid lawnmower.”
“That was an accident. So lawnmowers aren’t like combine harvesters. Big deal. It’s not like those things are expensiv- OOF! WOULD YOU QUIT THAT?!”
“Dude! The lawnmower cost 200 dollars to repair!”
“I coughed up, didn’t I?”
“Yeah. Your 92 cents certainly helped. Certainly helped in convincing everyone you were a loser!”
“STOP TALKING! I’M…”
“No you’re not.”
“YOU’RE-“
“No I’m not.”
“AAAGH!”
“I didn’t quite get that one. Speak up.”
“OI!” the manager’s voice shouted. “Keep it down!”
“Sorry!” Mordecai and Rigby yelled back.
“At least I get to laugh at you when you fail ridiculously with Margaret.”
“Be quiet. She’ll be out soon. She’s just getting her uniform on.”
After a while, Margaret came out of the Private area behind the till and started serving some customers.
Rigby turned to Mordecai. “Well?” He said.
“Well what.”
“Ask her out. Do it.”
“I can’t just do it. I have to give it time.”
“Will 2 seconds do?”
“Wait till she serves us.”
“That’ll be a while. She’s on till duty for the first half hour today.”
“You know an awful lot about her, don’t you?”
“No. There’s a job rota over there.” He pointed at a large table on the wall. “Looks like you’re going to have to go over there and order the date! Haha!”
Mordecai would have punched him but his fist was beginning to bruise. “Okay, fine.” He got up and walked purposefully towards the till. There was no queue, so he could go straight up to Margaret.
“Morning, Mordecai! Can I get you a drink?”
“Yes, please. Erm… I was wondering. Are you doing anything tonight?”
“Why are you asking me that?”
“Well, I was wondering if… if you aren’t doing anything… maybe you might want to… hang out? ”
He looked away from her, worried that seeing her facial expression would weaken his resolve.
“I’d love to. I have to go home at six though. Angel’s taking me out to a really nice restaurant. Is Rigby coming?”
“No, he has to… erm… do some work.”
“Okay. My shift ends at three. You can pick me up then.”
“Great. Thanks.” Mordecai wondered what he was thanking her for.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
“Where’ve you been?” Benson asked Mordecai and Rigby as they came into the house.
“We were having breakfast.” Rigby said simply.
“What did you have, a full English breakfast? Your shift started 10 minutes ago!”
“Benson.” Mordecai said. “Why didn’t you tell me my brother was coming?”
“You didn’t ask.” Benson said simply.
“Benson, Ray is the only person in the world I’ll admit I’m jealous of. You say that he’s rich, he’s funny and he makes everyone laugh. Everyone except me. I don’t fall for his stupid tricks. He’s a freak.”
“So what? I know you don’t like him for what he did to your science project, and how he ‘Abandoned you’ by going to university when you were 9. But he’s a much better person now.”
“How?”
Benson went red. “Look, Mordecai. I am not about to argue about this with you. My opinion is final.”
“But-“
“Read my lips. This. Is. Not. Negotiable. Now go and do your job or YOU’RE FIRED!”
Mordecai and Rigby began the chores Benson had given them.
“One more day.” Rigby said. “Just one more day.”
“Until what.” Mordecai asked.
“Until our week and a half off.”
“Yeah. Ray’s going to ruin it though.”
“What have you got against ray?”
“He makes lightbulbs explode.”
“That’s just a chemical imbalance in his brain. I’m sure he didn’t mean to blow our console up, he just got excited.”
“I don’t care. That guy is a walking electrical disruptor.”
Once they had finished their jobs, Mordecai and Rigby walked back to the house. “Why didn’t we bring a golf cart?” Rigby asked.
“Benson won’t let us. He’s punishing us for blowing up the lawnmower. Anyway, I’m off for my date with Margaret. I’ll be back before six.”
“Date? I don’t remember you telling her that.”
Mordecai ignored him. He walked down to the coffee shop.
“If you want me I’ll be at Jokeinators!” Rigby yelled after him.
Jokeinators. Mordecai thought. My brother’s company. He got to the shop finding that Margaret was already there waiting for him. “Hi.” She said.
“Hi.” Mordecai responded. “So, where do you want to go?”
“Can we go to the cinema? I feel like a movie.”
Rigby walked through the doors of Jokeinators. The shop was colourful and full of life. It wasn’t Jokeinators main store, that was miles away. But it was still one of the most bazar places Rigby had ever been to. Jokeinators made jokes. Not normal jokes. They sold things like holographic disguises, exploding boom boxes, and mad kites. If you wanted to play a practical joke on someone, you were never lost with Jokeinators around. But Rigby ignored all the merchandise. He strode across the shop and swiped his card in the door at the back. The door swung open to let him into the VIP area.
He looked around to see all the newly invented jokes. There was a vat of some kind of horrible boiling acid. There was a fake swimming pool which people were walking over. There was even a radius cloaking device somewhere. “Rigby?” a voice said. Rigby turned and saw Angel there.
“Oh, hi Angel. How goes the guitar business? ”
“Rigby, this is a joke shop. Why are we talking about business? How are you doing? I haven’t seen you in a while.”
“Me? Oh, I’m fine. Hey, you seen this?” he picked up a cloaker off one of the shelves and strapped it to himself. “Check it.” He said, hitting the button. The cloaker hid his entire body.
“Benefits of being small. Hey, how much are those things?”
“40 to 50 dollars, usually. Sometimes the army use them. These ones are made to only work when you keep still, so you can’t use them for crimes or anything.”
Rigby became visible again and put it back on the shelf. “I don’t really have that kind of cash on me though. Just being in the VIP’s club is costing me half of my paycheck.”
“I could buy it for you?” Angel offered.
“What, really?” Rigby asked.
“Sure. It’s just 50 bucks. I earn 500 a day. Anything for a bro.”
“Thanks, Angel.” Rigby said simply. Angel bought himself two cloakers and Rigby one. “We should hang out sometime. I’m taking my girlfriend out for tea tonight, you want to come? Don’t worry, we won’t embarrass you. If you want to come, I’ll be at the coffee shop at six.”
“Well, alright.” Rigby said. “I’ll see you at six then.”
Mordecai and Margaret had been to the cinema. They were now back at her apartment. “Well, bye Mordecai. I need to get changed. Thanks for walking me home.”
“No problem.” Mordecai said simply. Well, what am I waiting for? Tell her, god damn it.
“Margaret, wait.” He said simply.
“Hmm?” she said, halfway through closing the apartment door. She pulled it open again. “What is it?”
“I… have to tell you something.”
“Yes? Listen, if it’s about when you spilled the drink, don’t worry about it.”
“N-no, it’s not about that.”
She looked concerned. “Are you ok?”
“Yeah… It’s just… I like you.”
There was a long silence. “Well.” Mordecai said. “I like you is an understatement. I love you.”
“Mordecai,” Margaret began to say. “I don’t really-“ Mordecai prepared himself for the rejection.
“Who loves who?!” a voice said. Mordecai looked around to see angel standing there. He was looking at Mordecai with anger.
“Angel, I was just leavin-“
Angel grabbed him by the throat. “Listen, you. Margaret is mine. You hear me? Mine. And if I ever see you trying to take her away from me again, I will kill you. Alright?”
“Mordecai.” Margaret interrupted. “I’m sorry, but I don’t really like you.”
“You hear her? She doesn’t like you. Now get lost.” Angel dropped Mordecai who immediately scurried away, trying to hide the tears in his eyes.
Rigby had played a few good pranks with the cloaker. Skips could somehow see where he was by his shadow when he used it, but Benson’s reaction had been priceless. He hadn’t tried it on Pops, of course, worried that he might cry. Then Mordecai burst in the door. He looked like he’d been crying.
“Bad day?”
“Piss off.”
Mordecai walked upstairs and locked himself in the bathroom.
“Erm, listen. I’m going out now.” He called. “I won’t be back till half past seven.”
Mordecai didn’t reply.
“They grow up so fast.” Rigby muttered, leaving for the coffee shop. He left his cloaker at home.
“Mordecai!” a familiar voice called. The blue jay looked up from his coffee and saw a very exited racoon running down the stairs towards him.
“Oh, hi Rigby.”
Rigby sat down. “Guess what?” he said, barely holding in his excitement. “Your brother’s coming to stay for the summer break!”
“Brother?”
“Ray? Don’t you remember? He runs Jokeinators, dude!”
“What? Why the hell is that freak coming?”
“I thought you liked him.”
“Duh. No.”
“He’s your brother! Come on dude, he’s awesome!”
“He’s also a snob and a freak.”
“Firstly, Ray is not a snob. You’re just jealous of hi- OOF!”
Mordecai had punched him.
“Dude, what was that for?”
“You know what that was for.”
“Look, it’s not like he’s going to reject you. I mean, just because he runs the most successful joke company in the world and you- OW! Stop it!”
Mordecai had hit him again. “Why did you invite him?!”
“I didn’t invite him.” Rigby protested. “Benson invited him.”
“Great. Now we’re going to have that walking disaster ruining our summer!”
“Dude, he got over his condition now!” Rigby decided to change the subject. “So, why are you here? You don’t usually come at this time of day.”
“I’m going to try and ask Margaret out.”
“Dude, she has a boyfriend.”
“I can fix that.”
“You can’t fix anything.”
“Oh? I can’t fix anything? You’re the one who got us stuck in the meat locker. AND you almost burned us alive when you tried to fix that stupid lawnmower.”
“That was an accident. So lawnmowers aren’t like combine harvesters. Big deal. It’s not like those things are expensiv- OOF! WOULD YOU QUIT THAT?!”
“Dude! The lawnmower cost 200 dollars to repair!”
“I coughed up, didn’t I?”
“Yeah. Your 92 cents certainly helped. Certainly helped in convincing everyone you were a loser!”
“STOP TALKING! I’M…”
“No you’re not.”
“YOU’RE-“
“No I’m not.”
“AAAGH!”
“I didn’t quite get that one. Speak up.”
“OI!” the manager’s voice shouted. “Keep it down!”
“Sorry!” Mordecai and Rigby yelled back.
“At least I get to laugh at you when you fail ridiculously with Margaret.”
“Be quiet. She’ll be out soon. She’s just getting her uniform on.”
After a while, Margaret came out of the Private area behind the till and started serving some customers.
Rigby turned to Mordecai. “Well?” He said.
“Well what.”
“Ask her out. Do it.”
“I can’t just do it. I have to give it time.”
“Will 2 seconds do?”
“Wait till she serves us.”
“That’ll be a while. She’s on till duty for the first half hour today.”
“You know an awful lot about her, don’t you?”
“No. There’s a job rota over there.” He pointed at a large table on the wall. “Looks like you’re going to have to go over there and order the date! Haha!”
Mordecai would have punched him but his fist was beginning to bruise. “Okay, fine.” He got up and walked purposefully towards the till. There was no queue, so he could go straight up to Margaret.
“Morning, Mordecai! Can I get you a drink?”
“Yes, please. Erm… I was wondering. Are you doing anything tonight?”
“Why are you asking me that?”
“Well, I was wondering if… if you aren’t doing anything… maybe you might want to… hang out? ”
He looked away from her, worried that seeing her facial expression would weaken his resolve.
“I’d love to. I have to go home at six though. Angel’s taking me out to a really nice restaurant. Is Rigby coming?”
“No, he has to… erm… do some work.”
“Okay. My shift ends at three. You can pick me up then.”
“Great. Thanks.” Mordecai wondered what he was thanking her for.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
“Where’ve you been?” Benson asked Mordecai and Rigby as they came into the house.
“We were having breakfast.” Rigby said simply.
“What did you have, a full English breakfast? Your shift started 10 minutes ago!”
“Benson.” Mordecai said. “Why didn’t you tell me my brother was coming?”
“You didn’t ask.” Benson said simply.
“Benson, Ray is the only person in the world I’ll admit I’m jealous of. You say that he’s rich, he’s funny and he makes everyone laugh. Everyone except me. I don’t fall for his stupid tricks. He’s a freak.”
“So what? I know you don’t like him for what he did to your science project, and how he ‘Abandoned you’ by going to university when you were 9. But he’s a much better person now.”
“How?”
Benson went red. “Look, Mordecai. I am not about to argue about this with you. My opinion is final.”
“But-“
“Read my lips. This. Is. Not. Negotiable. Now go and do your job or YOU’RE FIRED!”
Mordecai and Rigby began the chores Benson had given them.
“One more day.” Rigby said. “Just one more day.”
“Until what.” Mordecai asked.
“Until our week and a half off.”
“Yeah. Ray’s going to ruin it though.”
“What have you got against ray?”
“He makes lightbulbs explode.”
“That’s just a chemical imbalance in his brain. I’m sure he didn’t mean to blow our console up, he just got excited.”
“I don’t care. That guy is a walking electrical disruptor.”
Once they had finished their jobs, Mordecai and Rigby walked back to the house. “Why didn’t we bring a golf cart?” Rigby asked.
“Benson won’t let us. He’s punishing us for blowing up the lawnmower. Anyway, I’m off for my date with Margaret. I’ll be back before six.”
“Date? I don’t remember you telling her that.”
Mordecai ignored him. He walked down to the coffee shop.
“If you want me I’ll be at Jokeinators!” Rigby yelled after him.
Jokeinators. Mordecai thought. My brother’s company. He got to the shop finding that Margaret was already there waiting for him. “Hi.” She said.
“Hi.” Mordecai responded. “So, where do you want to go?”
“Can we go to the cinema? I feel like a movie.”
Rigby walked through the doors of Jokeinators. The shop was colourful and full of life. It wasn’t Jokeinators main store, that was miles away. But it was still one of the most bazar places Rigby had ever been to. Jokeinators made jokes. Not normal jokes. They sold things like holographic disguises, exploding boom boxes, and mad kites. If you wanted to play a practical joke on someone, you were never lost with Jokeinators around. But Rigby ignored all the merchandise. He strode across the shop and swiped his card in the door at the back. The door swung open to let him into the VIP area.
He looked around to see all the newly invented jokes. There was a vat of some kind of horrible boiling acid. There was a fake swimming pool which people were walking over. There was even a radius cloaking device somewhere. “Rigby?” a voice said. Rigby turned and saw Angel there.
“Oh, hi Angel. How goes the guitar business? ”
“Rigby, this is a joke shop. Why are we talking about business? How are you doing? I haven’t seen you in a while.”
“Me? Oh, I’m fine. Hey, you seen this?” he picked up a cloaker off one of the shelves and strapped it to himself. “Check it.” He said, hitting the button. The cloaker hid his entire body.
“Benefits of being small. Hey, how much are those things?”
“40 to 50 dollars, usually. Sometimes the army use them. These ones are made to only work when you keep still, so you can’t use them for crimes or anything.”
Rigby became visible again and put it back on the shelf. “I don’t really have that kind of cash on me though. Just being in the VIP’s club is costing me half of my paycheck.”
“I could buy it for you?” Angel offered.
“What, really?” Rigby asked.
“Sure. It’s just 50 bucks. I earn 500 a day. Anything for a bro.”
“Thanks, Angel.” Rigby said simply. Angel bought himself two cloakers and Rigby one. “We should hang out sometime. I’m taking my girlfriend out for tea tonight, you want to come? Don’t worry, we won’t embarrass you. If you want to come, I’ll be at the coffee shop at six.”
“Well, alright.” Rigby said. “I’ll see you at six then.”
Mordecai and Margaret had been to the cinema. They were now back at her apartment. “Well, bye Mordecai. I need to get changed. Thanks for walking me home.”
“No problem.” Mordecai said simply. Well, what am I waiting for? Tell her, god damn it.
“Margaret, wait.” He said simply.
“Hmm?” she said, halfway through closing the apartment door. She pulled it open again. “What is it?”
“I… have to tell you something.”
“Yes? Listen, if it’s about when you spilled the drink, don’t worry about it.”
“N-no, it’s not about that.”
She looked concerned. “Are you ok?”
“Yeah… It’s just… I like you.”
There was a long silence. “Well.” Mordecai said. “I like you is an understatement. I love you.”
“Mordecai,” Margaret began to say. “I don’t really-“ Mordecai prepared himself for the rejection.
“Who loves who?!” a voice said. Mordecai looked around to see angel standing there. He was looking at Mordecai with anger.
“Angel, I was just leavin-“
Angel grabbed him by the throat. “Listen, you. Margaret is mine. You hear me? Mine. And if I ever see you trying to take her away from me again, I will kill you. Alright?”
“Mordecai.” Margaret interrupted. “I’m sorry, but I don’t really like you.”
“You hear her? She doesn’t like you. Now get lost.” Angel dropped Mordecai who immediately scurried away, trying to hide the tears in his eyes.
Rigby had played a few good pranks with the cloaker. Skips could somehow see where he was by his shadow when he used it, but Benson’s reaction had been priceless. He hadn’t tried it on Pops, of course, worried that he might cry. Then Mordecai burst in the door. He looked like he’d been crying.
“Bad day?”
“Piss off.”
Mordecai walked upstairs and locked himself in the bathroom.
“Erm, listen. I’m going out now.” He called. “I won’t be back till half past seven.”
Mordecai didn’t reply.
“They grow up so fast.” Rigby muttered, leaving for the coffee shop. He left his cloaker at home.