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posted by Seanthehedgehog
After Pierce left, Pete was upset.

Pete: The best worker I ever had, just quit.
Snowflake: That's not good.
Coffee Creme: I'm going to miss him.
Pete: Yeah. Well, we have a train waiting for you to take Coffee Creme. You must go to Fort Worth Texas.
Coffee Creme: Ok. *goes to engine*
Snowflake: *Goes back to signalbox*
Coffee Creme: *Shoveling coal into firebox*
Snowflake: *Turns signal green*
Coffee Creme: *Blows signal twice, then pulls lever* Ah! I've got wheel spin.
Pete: Stop your engine from slipping.
Coffee Creme: I don't know what to do! *pushes lever*
Pete: You stopped the engine. Are you sure you know what you're doing?
Coffee Creme: No.
Pete: *Sighs* We need Hawkeye back now.
Coffee Creme: Well, where is he?

At the bar

Hawkeye: *drinking whiskey* Here's to the engine I was driving earlier. She hauled ass, and heavy loads. No diesel would be better then that engine.
Waiter: Hey man, you seem depressed.
Hawkeye: Yeah. This steam engine I was driving got scrapped.
Waiter: Are you a worker for the Union Pacific?
Hawkeye: I was. I quit after the engine was scrapped.
Waiter: That's a shame.
Coffee Creme: *Arrives at bar*
Stallions: Ooh, it's a mare.
Coffee Creme: Bonjour.
Stallions: And she's french. Why don't we go to my house, and do it?
Coffee Creme: No thanks.
Hawkeye: Coffee Creme? Did you come here to get drunk with me?
Coffee Creme: No, the complete opposite of that. We need you back at the Union Pacific. I don't care if you say no, you're coming with me.
Hawkeye: Ok.
Coffee Creme: Wow, I didn't think you'd take it that easy. Let's get going then.
Hawkeye: But I'm drunk. How am I supposed to drive a train?
Coffee Creme: Leave it to me. *Slaps Hawkeye*
Hawkeye: *becomes sober* Ok, that hurt, but at least it worked. Let's go. *runs out of bar*

The two ponies returned to the train station.

Hawkeye: I am sorry for quitting. I realize that you have to do your job, just like how I'm going to do mine *gets in engine*
Pete: Glad to have you back Hawkeye.
Coffee Creme: *gets in*
Hawkeye: Glad to be back sir. *blows whistle*
Coffee Creme: *Shoveling coal*
Hawkeye: *drives train*
Pete: *Salutes Hawkeye*

The End

On the next episode of Ponies On The Rails

Something surprises Jeff.
added by pesikie
Twilight: I don't know what happened that led you to make your village without cutie marks, and I'm sorry my friends and I had to take it away.

Starlight: (angrily) You want to know what happened to me?! I'll show you!

SOON AFTER:

Starlight: Because of his cutie mark! He got his, and I didn't! He moved on, and I didn't! I stayed here and never made another friend because I was too afraid another cutie mark would take them away, too!

Twilight: That's ridiculous. A cutie mark can't take your friends away.

Starlight: Not everybody's lucky enough to get her cutie mark at the same time as her friends!...
continue reading...
added by NocturnalMirage
Source: EQD, joyreactor
posted by Seanthehedgehog
At a station marked Zweibrucken, Labiche was driving 45 miles an hour.

Schmidt: *Sees the station they are passing, and marks their current location on a map* We are home at last. We are in Germaneigh.

But they were really in Vitry Le Francois

Ponies: *Removing the station signs*

Next morning in Rive-Reine, Maurice was watching two ponies in a locomotive half a mile away from him.

Railroad Pony 92: *Blows the whistle as he drives forward*
Maurice: *Watching the train go faster, and faster*

It was going too fast, and once it got on the mainline, it derailed. The tracks were blocked.

Maurice:...
continue reading...
posted by Seanthehedgehog
At the pizza parlor.

Waiter: Jim, you got a call.
Jim: Okay. *Walks to phone, and picks it up* Hello?
Sam: It's Sam. Those Mexicans are dead. They crashed, and kill their selves.
Jim: Dammit. Next time we get attacked by these illegal immigrants, try to find out who their leader is.
Sam: Yes sir. *Hangs up, then goes to Case Cracker* Okay, Jim said next time we get attacked by those immigrants, we need to find out who their leader is. Let's go see how Gordon's doing.
Case Cracker: Okay. He should be at the hospital by now. *Drives to the hospital*
Sam: *Thinking* I have a hunch that I might know...
continue reading...
posted by Seanthehedgehog
Con returned to Canterlot for the breifing of his new assignment.

Con: *Waiting by P's office*
Miss Moneybit: He'll see you now.
Con: He won't be seeing me soon. Pinkie Pie might return and take P's spot.
Miss Moneybit: I wouldn't mind that.
Con: *Goes into P's office*
P: Good to see you're still alive 0007. What do you know about alicorns?
Con: They are either unicorns with wings, of pegasi with horns. Unfortunately, most ponies do not like their kind, because they believe that they're overpowered.
P: That is precisely what you're up against. An alicorn by the name of Ice Cube has created her...
continue reading...
posted by Seanthehedgehog
Case Cracker's car
Case Cracker's car
Blazin' Blue, Saten Twist, Ryan, Night Frizz, and NocturnalMirage got away from Master Sword, and Sean. Just as soon as they got out of Baltimare, they saw a car towing an open trailer with gascans, and ponies standing by them. The car towing this trailer was driven by Case Cracker.

Ryan: What kind of a car is that?
Mirage: I don't know mate. It looks Italian though, that's all I can tell you.
Saten Twist: *Looks inside car* Son of a bitch, he has a walkie talkie.
Case Cracker: Yo, what's up guys?
Blazin' Blue: Not much. How are you?
Case Cracker: Good. Where you headin?
Ryan: Fillydelphia.
Case...
continue reading...
added by NocturnalMirage
Source: EQD
added by NocturnalMirage
Source: EQD, joyreactor
added by NocturnalMirage
Source: EQD, deviantart, joyreactor
added by NocturnalMirage
Source: EQD, joyreactor
added by NocturnalMirage
Source: original owners, EQD, joyreactor
added by NocturnalMirage
Source: original owners, EQD, tumblr, joyreactor
added by NocturnalMirage
Source: original owners, EQD, tumblr, joyreactor
added by NocturnalMirage
Source: original owners, EQD, tumblr, joyreactor
added by NocturnalMirage
Source: original owners, EQD, tumblr, joyreactor
added by NocturnalMirage
Source: original owners, EQD, tumblr, joyreactor
added by NocturnalMirage
Source: original owners, EQD, tumblr, joycreator
added by NocturnalMirage
Source: original owners, EQD, tumblr, joycreator
added by NocturnalMirage
Source: original owners, EQD, tumblr, google