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Advice Question

Give me you advice

The story goes:

First day in college ( well freshman week)(its about four or five weeks in to school and it stared on the 17) I made some friends in freshman week like the third day, but after a few days we stop talking and every time i look up, they are looking at me. I don't know if i did anything to them, they just dropped me, and i do not know why.

I'm upset a little because this is college and people act like they are in middle school, and also i hear everyone say you make the best of friends in college your freshman year.

I don't know what to do or how to make new friends, i feel so alone, and i cry almost every night. I can't make friends with the people in my class because at my school we do learning community so people with the same major get grouped together, i'm ok if the girls i talk to and i aren't friends but how do i make new ones

please help me because i really feel lonely, and its hard being away from home and family and friends and my boyfriend
 rose12345 posted over a year ago
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Advice Answers

teamsalvatore98 said:
About a year ago, my best friend since first grade dropped me like I was a hot potato. I stood up for her several times because she was being called ugly and nerdy by girls who were supposedly her friends- nowadays those are the people she hangs out with. I was so miserable because I felt like it was my fault and that I did something wrong. I tried asking if she was angry with me, but she always replied with, "No, why would you think that?" After a couple months, we didn't even make eye contact with each other. She turned her back on me and I was absolutely crushed- I even lashed out at my mother, who had done nothing, because she brought her up. The best thing anyone can do in a situation like that is move on, which is exactly what you're trying to do. Making friends isn't easy- it takes time and dedication. What you need to do is listen to conversations around you. If the people involved are talking about something you're interested in, you join the conversation without a second thought. It can be hard, but it works out in the long run. Even if they completely reject you, it's better to have tried and failed than to not try at all. The biggest thing about making friends is persistence- keep trying to find someone you have common interests with, but don't be annoying. I always make friends by making terrible puns; it almost always works. But you need to remember to be yourself, and keep your values in mind. Let's say you value not smoking, and your potential friends are trying to offer you a cigarette. Friendship is all about being able to be yourself with people who are close to you. If you have to put on a mask in order to hang out with your 'friends' then you need to rethink your priorities, and remember who YOU want to be, not who your friends want you to be.

To sum it up:

1. Persistence is key- there's absolutely no guarantee that someone is going to immediately ask you to be their BFF. In fact, the first time you try joining a conversation, they'll probably completely ignore you. But that doesn't mean you should give up.

2. Be yourself, and no one else- Real friends will love you no matter what you do or believe in. It's so incredibly important that you remember what YOU as an individual want. If being friends with someone keeps you from being truly happy and shining as bright as you should, you're in a poisonous relationship.

3. Remember that friends will come and go- Nothing lasts forever, I've learned that the hard way. What matters most is that you keep all the memories =, not just the good ones, and learn from your past relationships and mistakes. It might take some time, but sooner or later, you'll look back and thank that person for showing their true colors- if they hadn't, you probably would have ended up hurt even more.
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posted over a year ago 
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Thank you so much
rose12345 posted over a year ago
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No problem! I really hope it works out for you, too. If all else fails, we can be fanpop buddies! \^-^/
teamsalvatore98 posted over a year ago
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