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Kassaremidylynn said:
I'm sorry to say that unless you let him go, there is nothing we can do to help. My mom went through the same thing - my dad cheated constantly but she stuck around. She said she loved and him that he'd change. Guess what? He never did. She left him when I was almost five. Ten years later, and he still hasn't changed a bit. Can you imagine how depressed my mother would have been, living in a horrible situation like that for ten more years? She was already having break downs every other night. I know, I witnessed them.
Even if you love him, you have to think about any children you may have. Do you have any idea how traumatizing it is for a four year old girl to watch her parents scream, yell, push each other, and knock over furniture? Or to see your mother lying in her bed, alone, and crying, because your father is out and she knows he is with another woman? Those still stick with me. I still have nightmares and I still have violent reactions to argueing. Even if it is a small one, I have panic attacks. I hyperventilate, I cry, I get sweaty, and hot and then really cold...honestly, just thinking about them makes my heart beat speed up.
That's not something you would want any future children living with. That will stick with me the rest of my life. Can you imagine how embarrassing and horrifying it is to have a panic attack in public over a couple you have never even talked to? That could happen to a child if you stay with this man.
Don't worry about being lonely. You will meet someone who is kind and treats you right one day. You don't need to stick with some bastard. You ARE worth it, no matter what your fiance may say. The environment you are in is poisonous. You need to leave it.
I know it's harsh and I know you won't want to at first. But remember something:
Love doesn't hurt you. Love accepts you and wants you and only you, not you and some other person on the side for a bit, and then you again. No matter what your fiance feels for you, love is not it. Do not get locked up in a loveless marriage. It's not worth it. Not on you, not on your family, not on any kids that may be born.
Leave him. Leave him and never look back.
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