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Writing Question

Umm so i have this assignment..

okay well i've got a religion assignment where i have to show an artistic interpretation of Jesus. Now i chose to do the sea and do a bunch of short poems...um yeah if you could like help me, that'd be great, if youu think i'm going in the right direction, if its a tota piece of crap..okay.
ps. I REALLY need help with my ending, it sounds really bad to me

To feel the sand
The sun on your back
It’s a no man’s land
With no fear of attack
No chains of society
The sea frees all
Lose all your anxiety
And watch as the waves fall
God’s second heaven under the sun
Surrounding all people being
The sea will be undone
For those people foreseeing
The sea without God’s sight

 Free_Spirit posted over a year ago
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Writing Answers

shadow-angel said:
That's really good....not a piece of crap.....I think you've got a pretty strong ending...keep up the good work! :)
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posted over a year ago 
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thanks :)
Free_Spirit posted over a year ago
summer448 said:
I LOVE IT!!
thats amazing :D
i wish i could write like you :)
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posted over a year ago 
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hahaha thanks, you don't know how nice compliment that is to me lol
Free_Spirit posted over a year ago
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