This is my first one:))) comment please


Water dripped off my blazing red hair and onto the floor.
“Mom? Can I leave now?” Mom had made me go outside, in the freezing rain, and gather all of the wet clothes on the line. I was shaking now in the corner, covered from head to toe with water, I coughed.
“Vic your not dry enough. Just a couple more minutes.” Mary was standing by the edge of the wall, looking at me, a smile on her face. She loved my torture.
“Okay, you can go up now.” Yes, I quickly fled up the stairs and into my room.
    It was warm in here. My bed...

Victoria knealed down, looking at the ashes of her beloved one James. Tears were begining to fall down her face. Revenge is all she could think of at that moment. Laurent stood leaning against the wall arms crossed. Victoria turned around and stood up. "They will not win. Not this time. We shall be the victorious ones. After all, my Mother did not name me Victoria for nothing. Payback is what they'll get." said Victoria. She quickly wiped a couple of tears off of her face. Laurent shook his head and said "I do not want to be in another vampire mishap. Not again.". Victoria looked at him, one...