Okay, I'll admit that I haven't laughed this hard at a film since I saw The Hangover last summer. Seriously, what was the plot here? I actually found the first film to be much better than this travesty. You can find my review of the first movie link. I'll go through it like I do with all movies. Pros and cons, then an overall.
Pros
The Volturi
Finally! Some ACTUAL vampires!! The Volturi I found were pretty awesome because, you know, they actually were cruel, soulless, mean, and did some actual VAMPIRING. The part towards the end where a tour group of humans is led directly to them and you hear their screams was pretty awesome. Come on people, that's what vampires do. They drink the blood of huuumans. Sheesh. Also, they were pretty cruel too, what with the whole smack down of Edward and nearly killing Bella (so bummed that didn't happen). Getting a small glimpse of the actor who will be playing Grindelwald in Deathly Hallows was a nice bonus too. So for all you Twilight fans, the Volturi are GOOD examples of vampires. Much like the soulless vampires on Buffy.
The Wolf Clan
Now why I didn't particularly enjoy the crappy computer animation of the wolves (more on that later) I did enjoy the characters of the wolf clan. The one scene that I really liked is where we see Sam's fiance, with half her face clawed up. My friend and I definitely agree that even with the claw marks she was amazingly beautiful. I would see a movie about her and Sam in a heartbeat. It would be much much better than this terrible film. Pity they were stuck in it.
Jacob
Lautner got hot. No denying that. Other than the hotness factor though, he was probably the only real character with any dimensions and depth besides Bella's father. The way their relationship built to where Jacob fell for Bella, and she pretty much for him, was very realistic and healthy. So you can imagine my dissappointment when she chose Edward, who abandoned, controlled, and basically led to much of her depression, over Jacob. You Team Jacob fans, I now consider you semi-sane because you recognized a HEALTHY relationship. Props to you guys.
Cons
Bella...you there?
I hate the character of Bella, I truly do. She doesn't think for herself, is defined solely by her relationships, and for some reason Stewart could NEVER SHUT HER MOUTH. Even when she wasn't talking!! What was up with that?! Gaah. The fact too that she dissed her friends at school and put her dad through so much crap with the screaming at night (seriously, wtf, she doesn't have PTSD) made me just loathe her character even more with a passion. Furthermore, her whole obsession over age was just ridiculous. Ohhh nooo you're a whole year older than your 107 year old vampire boyfriend!! Now he's not going to love you anymore!!! Yea, stupid. Those fans out there that idolize her, please find a healthier role model such as Eowyn, Hermione, heck even Lily on How I Met Your Mother. Bella is a very unhealthy and psychologically unstable character and is an insult to females everywhere. She didn't even drive her own car most of the time! Disgusting.
How is she special too btw?
If someone can explain how Bella is unaffected by any of the vampire's powers, it'd be much appreciated. That just seems like something that's just thrown out there. My theory? It's because Bella has no thoughts!
Edward...dude wtf?!
Sooo this guy that supposedly is totally in love with you throws you into a glass table for protection, lies to you, breaks up with you, and abandons you in the forest. A car ride home would have been nice plskthnx. Also, the throwing into the glass table for her protection? That was totally safe. You know, because she was bleeding even more profusely after the table than she was after the papercut. Also, who has ever bled that much after a papercut anyways, if at all? Furthermore, the fact that he kept "appearing" everytime Bella had an adrenaline rush was just weird. I think if my ex-boyfriend started showing up everytime I had a rush, I'd go and get a CT of my brain to make sure I didn't have a brain tumor a la Izzie seeing Denny b/c of her tumor. Also, the fact that Bella takes him right back after all the crap he put her through was just great. Really shows girls that hey, after a guy lies to you like that you can totally trust him again with no really good explanation other than "I love you". Nice.
OMG a Plot Point!!!
Annd what was the plot?? Everytime a possible plot point appeared it seemed to get derailed, such as the shots of Victoria, Laurent, or whenever anyone said Bella was acting crazy. If anyone spoke reason or a plot point appeared, it did not show again.
Lupin's Wolf Looked Better...
The film must have had the world's worst computer animation department because those wolves were a travesty. How about those transf...I mean FURSPLOSIONS eh? Really bad animation coupled with a laughable transformation sequence (FURSPLODE!) led to even more laughs. Too bad there weren't enough fursplosions.
That's What She Said!
There were way too many lines in the film where one could easily say that. For example- Bella: I'm coming! Me: That's what she said! Edward: I don't want you to come! Me: That's what HE said!! If you don't get the meaning behind that, then please go watch The Office where it is regularly utilized. Furthermore, the scene where Edward kisses Bella in front of her truck after the party was too funny. Edward acted like...well like link SNL skit. Please be forewarned that that link is meant for those 16 and older. That scene probably got one of the biggest laughs out of me.
Blocked
Finally, all the kiss-blocking that poor Jacob suffered through. Face Punch high school guy who threw up at an action movie (he's so gay then), Bella denies, and Edward calls just as he macks on the upper lip! Seriously, Jacob should have just pulled an Owen (Grey's Anatomy character), grabbed Bella, and just rocked her world. Doubt she woulda left if he did that.
Overall
Overall, this movie was a travesty to the film community. It was plotless, very poorly acted, and featured a very unhealthy set of characters that girls and women alike should not look up to as role models. Bella should have been thrown in a psych center for the stuff she was experiencing. I'm not going to apologize either if I've offended anyone. This is my honest opinion, and I know I wasn't as kind as I was in my first review. Now you've heard an opinion of an anti-Twilighter. You Team Jacobers, you got some respect from me now. Please save your brain cells and your money and do not see this movie. Unless you want a really good laugh then by all means do. Oh and one more thing to note. The ending with the whole Marry me? Ending on the *gasp* garnered a huge laugh from our audience. And just for my own satisfaction, FURSPLODE TIME!!
Pros
The Volturi
Finally! Some ACTUAL vampires!! The Volturi I found were pretty awesome because, you know, they actually were cruel, soulless, mean, and did some actual VAMPIRING. The part towards the end where a tour group of humans is led directly to them and you hear their screams was pretty awesome. Come on people, that's what vampires do. They drink the blood of huuumans. Sheesh. Also, they were pretty cruel too, what with the whole smack down of Edward and nearly killing Bella (so bummed that didn't happen). Getting a small glimpse of the actor who will be playing Grindelwald in Deathly Hallows was a nice bonus too. So for all you Twilight fans, the Volturi are GOOD examples of vampires. Much like the soulless vampires on Buffy.
The Wolf Clan
Now why I didn't particularly enjoy the crappy computer animation of the wolves (more on that later) I did enjoy the characters of the wolf clan. The one scene that I really liked is where we see Sam's fiance, with half her face clawed up. My friend and I definitely agree that even with the claw marks she was amazingly beautiful. I would see a movie about her and Sam in a heartbeat. It would be much much better than this terrible film. Pity they were stuck in it.
Jacob
Lautner got hot. No denying that. Other than the hotness factor though, he was probably the only real character with any dimensions and depth besides Bella's father. The way their relationship built to where Jacob fell for Bella, and she pretty much for him, was very realistic and healthy. So you can imagine my dissappointment when she chose Edward, who abandoned, controlled, and basically led to much of her depression, over Jacob. You Team Jacob fans, I now consider you semi-sane because you recognized a HEALTHY relationship. Props to you guys.
Cons
Bella...you there?
I hate the character of Bella, I truly do. She doesn't think for herself, is defined solely by her relationships, and for some reason Stewart could NEVER SHUT HER MOUTH. Even when she wasn't talking!! What was up with that?! Gaah. The fact too that she dissed her friends at school and put her dad through so much crap with the screaming at night (seriously, wtf, she doesn't have PTSD) made me just loathe her character even more with a passion. Furthermore, her whole obsession over age was just ridiculous. Ohhh nooo you're a whole year older than your 107 year old vampire boyfriend!! Now he's not going to love you anymore!!! Yea, stupid. Those fans out there that idolize her, please find a healthier role model such as Eowyn, Hermione, heck even Lily on How I Met Your Mother. Bella is a very unhealthy and psychologically unstable character and is an insult to females everywhere. She didn't even drive her own car most of the time! Disgusting.
How is she special too btw?
If someone can explain how Bella is unaffected by any of the vampire's powers, it'd be much appreciated. That just seems like something that's just thrown out there. My theory? It's because Bella has no thoughts!
Edward...dude wtf?!
Sooo this guy that supposedly is totally in love with you throws you into a glass table for protection, lies to you, breaks up with you, and abandons you in the forest. A car ride home would have been nice plskthnx. Also, the throwing into the glass table for her protection? That was totally safe. You know, because she was bleeding even more profusely after the table than she was after the papercut. Also, who has ever bled that much after a papercut anyways, if at all? Furthermore, the fact that he kept "appearing" everytime Bella had an adrenaline rush was just weird. I think if my ex-boyfriend started showing up everytime I had a rush, I'd go and get a CT of my brain to make sure I didn't have a brain tumor a la Izzie seeing Denny b/c of her tumor. Also, the fact that Bella takes him right back after all the crap he put her through was just great. Really shows girls that hey, after a guy lies to you like that you can totally trust him again with no really good explanation other than "I love you". Nice.
OMG a Plot Point!!!
Annd what was the plot?? Everytime a possible plot point appeared it seemed to get derailed, such as the shots of Victoria, Laurent, or whenever anyone said Bella was acting crazy. If anyone spoke reason or a plot point appeared, it did not show again.
Lupin's Wolf Looked Better...
The film must have had the world's worst computer animation department because those wolves were a travesty. How about those transf...I mean FURSPLOSIONS eh? Really bad animation coupled with a laughable transformation sequence (FURSPLODE!) led to even more laughs. Too bad there weren't enough fursplosions.
That's What She Said!
There were way too many lines in the film where one could easily say that. For example- Bella: I'm coming! Me: That's what she said! Edward: I don't want you to come! Me: That's what HE said!! If you don't get the meaning behind that, then please go watch The Office where it is regularly utilized. Furthermore, the scene where Edward kisses Bella in front of her truck after the party was too funny. Edward acted like...well like link SNL skit. Please be forewarned that that link is meant for those 16 and older. That scene probably got one of the biggest laughs out of me.
Blocked
Finally, all the kiss-blocking that poor Jacob suffered through. Face Punch high school guy who threw up at an action movie (he's so gay then), Bella denies, and Edward calls just as he macks on the upper lip! Seriously, Jacob should have just pulled an Owen (Grey's Anatomy character), grabbed Bella, and just rocked her world. Doubt she woulda left if he did that.
Overall
Overall, this movie was a travesty to the film community. It was plotless, very poorly acted, and featured a very unhealthy set of characters that girls and women alike should not look up to as role models. Bella should have been thrown in a psych center for the stuff she was experiencing. I'm not going to apologize either if I've offended anyone. This is my honest opinion, and I know I wasn't as kind as I was in my first review. Now you've heard an opinion of an anti-Twilighter. You Team Jacobers, you got some respect from me now. Please save your brain cells and your money and do not see this movie. Unless you want a really good laugh then by all means do. Oh and one more thing to note. The ending with the whole Marry me? Ending on the *gasp* garnered a huge laugh from our audience. And just for my own satisfaction, FURSPLODE TIME!!
"It shocked me.I was not sure if she meant to attack.That's the only interpretation of her behavior that my past had to offer.But she was smiling.And the emotions that were emanating from her were like nothing I'd ever felt before.
"'You've kept me waiting a long time,'she said."
I didn't realize Alice had come to stand behind me again.
"And you ducked your head like a good Southern gentleman,and said,'I'm sorry ma'am.'"Alice laughed at the memory.
Jasper smiled down at her."You held out your hand,and I took it without stopping to make sense of what I was doing.For the first time in almost a century,I felt hope."
Jasper took Alice's hand as he spoke.
Alice grinned."I was just relieved.I thought you were never going to show up."
it is just MY opinion...
i think it was very well done thinking of it just as a movie you know it wont ever be exactly like the book ... or with such many detailz
things i loved:
*the humor they use (for example bella: if things end bad like i would become the meal) haha
*alice ! the character is very well portrayed
*the end ( victoria watching)
*the baseball game!
*men cast haha =P
*stephenie meyer appearing wooow!
things that dissapointed me:
* the clearing ! i dont liked the sparkling effect ...
*it was really fast everything
*alice's story was missing ...
things that were wrong: (i didnt noticed until the third time i saw it)
*billy was driving !
*when edward is playing th e piano for bella he didnt sparkle
*victoria appears in the prom in the crowd (edward would read her thoughtz)
but i like it anyway ! it ir TWILIGHT !
i think it was very well done thinking of it just as a movie you know it wont ever be exactly like the book ... or with such many detailz
things i loved:
*the humor they use (for example bella: if things end bad like i would become the meal) haha
*alice ! the character is very well portrayed
*the end ( victoria watching)
*the baseball game!
*men cast haha =P
*stephenie meyer appearing wooow!
things that dissapointed me:
* the clearing ! i dont liked the sparkling effect ...
*it was really fast everything
*alice's story was missing ...
things that were wrong: (i didnt noticed until the third time i saw it)
*billy was driving !
*when edward is playing th e piano for bella he didnt sparkle
*victoria appears in the prom in the crowd (edward would read her thoughtz)
but i like it anyway ! it ir TWILIGHT !
While visiting “The Ellen DeGeneres Show,” for an episode that airs this Friday — the same day Pattinson’s vampiric portrayal of Edward Cullen springs to life on the big screen, he denied having romantic ties to anyone.
“Now, are you single?” Ellen asked.
“Ah, yeah,” the British actor replied.
And it appears despite women throwing themselves at him regularly, Pattinson may be stuck in singleton mode permanently.
“No one else seems to get into a relationship with me. It’s really strange,” he told Ellen.
“People like screaming at me,” the heartthrob added. “Actually, they like screaming at me in relationships as well. No one wants to commit.”
okay, so, all these people are complaining about Bella's Lullaby. I heard, "Bella's Lullaby sucked in my opinion" or "The strings and the orchestra weren't supposed to be in the song" or "They need to cut out the orchestra cuz it sucked with that in it". Just stuff like that which is disrespectful to Summit, Carter Burwell, and all the people associated with the project. People don't need to say such rude comments about it.
and in my opinion, this is the soundtrack. obviously they are gonna put the score they have that goes with the movie's music. It can't just be a random piece that doesn't fit in with the rest of the score. that's just what pisses me off. when people judge something too quickly without laying down all the facts.
and in my opinion, this is the soundtrack. obviously they are gonna put the score they have that goes with the movie's music. It can't just be a random piece that doesn't fit in with the rest of the score. that's just what pisses me off. when people judge something too quickly without laying down all the facts.
Hello My Follow Twilighters!
there's a New Spot Made, it's The Leah and Jacob spot, so if you like their friendship/relationsip couple wise, feel free to join!
link
JOIN TODAY!
where you can discuss their partnership, with other fans, make/find Leah and Jacob Fan Art, and what you think over all of Jacob and Leah.
and if you have any concerns, or request for the spot, don't be scared to ask, also if you know anyone else who likes the Couple, please spread the Jeah Love This way :)
DefineDelicate
aka
Tiff
there's a New Spot Made, it's The Leah and Jacob spot, so if you like their friendship/relationsip couple wise, feel free to join!
link
JOIN TODAY!
where you can discuss their partnership, with other fans, make/find Leah and Jacob Fan Art, and what you think over all of Jacob and Leah.
and if you have any concerns, or request for the spot, don't be scared to ask, also if you know anyone else who likes the Couple, please spread the Jeah Love This way :)
DefineDelicate
aka
Tiff
Hey! Do you guys know a good twilight fan site? Help us all out and tell us... so we can go on!
Heres the cool site I found: www.freewebs.com/twilighttrailer
I think that you all know of stephenie's website..... stepheniemeyer.com
Oh! Also- If anyones knows of a good site to see interviews or more trailer... Tell Me!
Speaking of stephenie's website... did any of you see the "quote of the day" thing she's doing!? I LOVE that idea! what do you guys think? I like the idea.. and I just cant wait to read Breaking Dawn! The movie should be good too :)
Heres the cool site I found: www.freewebs.com/twilighttrailer
I think that you all know of stephenie's website..... stepheniemeyer.com
Oh! Also- If anyones knows of a good site to see interviews or more trailer... Tell Me!
Speaking of stephenie's website... did any of you see the "quote of the day" thing she's doing!? I LOVE that idea! what do you guys think? I like the idea.. and I just cant wait to read Breaking Dawn! The movie should be good too :)