Why? Had she come back to finish destroying what was left of my peace? I could see she was crying, yet I felt no urge to comfort her.
"I just came by to drop off your stuff, I'll leave. But I want to talk to you first."
I walked backwards onto the porch. I looked over to see Liz's expression. It wasn't happy. She was really mad at something. Or about something.
Bella, followed me onto the porch. I shut the door behind her.
"What,"I asked, placing a mask of no emotion over my face. I didn't want her to see how bad this was.
"I want you back, I still love you. I see how much I need you now. How can I have done that to you, choosing Jake..."
She trailed off, waiting for me to answer.
"I'm sorry, I can't do this."
"Can't do what? I know that this is hard, I still want you though, I will always want you, we were perfect together. How could I not?"
"Bella, your so fickle. Can't you see how much you're hurting him? I know I love you, but you chose him, so you should stick with him, go back, back to that dog and you apologize. Please don't come back, I just can't take it. You are too bad for me, and I really don't want you anymore. Please, just leave."
"But, Edward,...I... I love you."
"But, I don't love you, not anymore."
She looked down, more tears overflowing her eyes. I wanted to wrap my arms around her, but there was someone else that meant more to me now.
"Go,"I said.
She stood there, then she slowly walked around me and toward her motorcycle.
"Go, go and never return. GO!"
I closed my eyes and went inside, my eyes pricked, like I would be crying, if I could. That was one of the worst things I've ever done, but I know now that it was for the best. That way I could have Liz.
I looked up at my revelations into the most beautiful eyes in the world.
"Are you okay?"
"Honestly, I don't think I am. She was my first love, I really want her but, I've found something better. I also need to talk to you."
"About what?"
"About the mind reading thing."
"Mind reading thing?.... Oh, you mean that wasn't a dream? That really happened?"
"Yes, that really happened. I understand if you don't want me anymore, if you're angry I can leave, but I need to know if you can forgive me, I don't like having you mad at me. I want to tell you how much you really mean to me, but I don't want you to leave, I don't want you to hate me...."
She cut me off,"Stop, stop it. I forgive you, it wasn't even you I was mad at, I was angry at myself. I was only a little bit mad at you. Those thoughts, they are something I've never told anyone, I really didn't want anyone to know that I'm a killer. It was all my fault. I was angry and I just couldn't stop myself, I mean, sure I didn't touch the blade, but I know it was all my fault...."
This time I cut her off.
"It's not your fault. I know you think it was but it was your power. I mean, sure you won't really have it until you're a vampire, if you become a vampire, but still I'm the only true murderer here. I killed people, I did it on purpose, but you, you didn't even know what was going on. I purposefully chased bad guys down an alley, I made sure they were evil, but I realize now how wrong it was for me to take a human life. You on the other hand, you didn't do anything on purpose, people do stupid things when they're angry."
She stared at the floor, silent tears flowing down her cheeks. I felt the urge, once again, to comfort, and so I did. For the first time, I wrapped my arms around her, and I held her close to me, letting her cry herself out. I drug her over to the couch, so she could sit and I sat with her.
-----------------------------
I looked up as the front door opened. I didn't know how long I had been sitting here. Liz had fallen sleep. Her head rested on my lap. I let her there, for who knows how long, just not wanting to disturb her.
"How is everything?"
"Everything is fine. She feels horrible, but I think she is the one, she means more to me than Bella did. I think that is more than I can ask for. And I think she loves me back."
"That's wonderful, but, you should let her in the bed."
"I don't want to wake her."
"Well it's almost time for sunset, so I'll go make her something to eat."
Liz stirred. She slowly opened her eyes. Then she stretched, sort of like a cat, and sat up.
"Good evening Liz, how was your nap?"
"Great, that felt good, to get everything off my chest."
"So do you still want me?"
Of course I want you, I think I'm in love with you, and I never want you to leave me.
She smiled at me. I smiled back.
"What do you want for dinner?"
"I think I want some spaghetti."
"Great, I'll make you some."
"No, Edward, I want to make it. It's the least I could do, since you make Edward happy,"Esme said.
"Thanks,"Liz replied.
Alice came through the door.
"Wow, she has better fashion sense than Bella, at least. You are so coming shopping with me. We can go to Seattle and Olympia and ...."
"Alice, stop talking,"I said cutting her off,"Let Liz be, she had a long day.
"I wasn't talking to you Edward,"she said, sticking her tongue at me.
I rolled my eyes.
"We can go tomorrow."
"Okay, I love to shop, maybe I can get you a present, since I love you and my feelings are returned. Besides. It's our 1 week anniversary tomorrow."
"I'll have one for you too."
"Spaghettis ready, Liz."
"Okay,"she said jumping up.
I watched her leave. Then I grabbed the box and headed upstairs to my room. I was curious as to what Bella brought back.
"I just came by to drop off your stuff, I'll leave. But I want to talk to you first."
I walked backwards onto the porch. I looked over to see Liz's expression. It wasn't happy. She was really mad at something. Or about something.
Bella, followed me onto the porch. I shut the door behind her.
"What,"I asked, placing a mask of no emotion over my face. I didn't want her to see how bad this was.
"I want you back, I still love you. I see how much I need you now. How can I have done that to you, choosing Jake..."
She trailed off, waiting for me to answer.
"I'm sorry, I can't do this."
"Can't do what? I know that this is hard, I still want you though, I will always want you, we were perfect together. How could I not?"
"Bella, your so fickle. Can't you see how much you're hurting him? I know I love you, but you chose him, so you should stick with him, go back, back to that dog and you apologize. Please don't come back, I just can't take it. You are too bad for me, and I really don't want you anymore. Please, just leave."
"But, Edward,...I... I love you."
"But, I don't love you, not anymore."
She looked down, more tears overflowing her eyes. I wanted to wrap my arms around her, but there was someone else that meant more to me now.
"Go,"I said.
She stood there, then she slowly walked around me and toward her motorcycle.
"Go, go and never return. GO!"
I closed my eyes and went inside, my eyes pricked, like I would be crying, if I could. That was one of the worst things I've ever done, but I know now that it was for the best. That way I could have Liz.
I looked up at my revelations into the most beautiful eyes in the world.
"Are you okay?"
"Honestly, I don't think I am. She was my first love, I really want her but, I've found something better. I also need to talk to you."
"About what?"
"About the mind reading thing."
"Mind reading thing?.... Oh, you mean that wasn't a dream? That really happened?"
"Yes, that really happened. I understand if you don't want me anymore, if you're angry I can leave, but I need to know if you can forgive me, I don't like having you mad at me. I want to tell you how much you really mean to me, but I don't want you to leave, I don't want you to hate me...."
She cut me off,"Stop, stop it. I forgive you, it wasn't even you I was mad at, I was angry at myself. I was only a little bit mad at you. Those thoughts, they are something I've never told anyone, I really didn't want anyone to know that I'm a killer. It was all my fault. I was angry and I just couldn't stop myself, I mean, sure I didn't touch the blade, but I know it was all my fault...."
This time I cut her off.
"It's not your fault. I know you think it was but it was your power. I mean, sure you won't really have it until you're a vampire, if you become a vampire, but still I'm the only true murderer here. I killed people, I did it on purpose, but you, you didn't even know what was going on. I purposefully chased bad guys down an alley, I made sure they were evil, but I realize now how wrong it was for me to take a human life. You on the other hand, you didn't do anything on purpose, people do stupid things when they're angry."
She stared at the floor, silent tears flowing down her cheeks. I felt the urge, once again, to comfort, and so I did. For the first time, I wrapped my arms around her, and I held her close to me, letting her cry herself out. I drug her over to the couch, so she could sit and I sat with her.
-----------------------------
I looked up as the front door opened. I didn't know how long I had been sitting here. Liz had fallen sleep. Her head rested on my lap. I let her there, for who knows how long, just not wanting to disturb her.
"How is everything?"
"Everything is fine. She feels horrible, but I think she is the one, she means more to me than Bella did. I think that is more than I can ask for. And I think she loves me back."
"That's wonderful, but, you should let her in the bed."
"I don't want to wake her."
"Well it's almost time for sunset, so I'll go make her something to eat."
Liz stirred. She slowly opened her eyes. Then she stretched, sort of like a cat, and sat up.
"Good evening Liz, how was your nap?"
"Great, that felt good, to get everything off my chest."
"So do you still want me?"
Of course I want you, I think I'm in love with you, and I never want you to leave me.
She smiled at me. I smiled back.
"What do you want for dinner?"
"I think I want some spaghetti."
"Great, I'll make you some."
"No, Edward, I want to make it. It's the least I could do, since you make Edward happy,"Esme said.
"Thanks,"Liz replied.
Alice came through the door.
"Wow, she has better fashion sense than Bella, at least. You are so coming shopping with me. We can go to Seattle and Olympia and ...."
"Alice, stop talking,"I said cutting her off,"Let Liz be, she had a long day.
"I wasn't talking to you Edward,"she said, sticking her tongue at me.
I rolled my eyes.
"We can go tomorrow."
"Okay, I love to shop, maybe I can get you a present, since I love you and my feelings are returned. Besides. It's our 1 week anniversary tomorrow."
"I'll have one for you too."
"Spaghettis ready, Liz."
"Okay,"she said jumping up.
I watched her leave. Then I grabbed the box and headed upstairs to my room. I was curious as to what Bella brought back.
