]A/N: This chapter is where the M rating really starts to kick in. Just thought I’d give a little warning.

Chapter Three: Needs

We ran through the woods, the springy forest floor making it easier to launch ourselves through the dense underbrush. I heard Edward’s even breathing beside me and pushed myself harder. If I concentrated on racing him home I wouldn’t be so fixated on getting him naked. At least I hoped so.

“Bella, slow down,” Edward called from behind me. I stopped mid-stride and turned to see my husband standing about fifty feet behind me.

“What? We are almost home,” I said and sprinted to his side. He didn’t answer me; he pulled me into his arms and kissed me fiercely. Instantly I knew why he wanted to run home and it wasn’t to burn off the energy. He wanted to be able to make love to me without our whole family listening in. I approved of this idea wholeheartedly.

We fell to the forest floor, holding each other tightly as though afraid to let go. I didn’t even realize it when our clothes disappeared beneath Edward’s nimble fingers. One moment they were there and then they were in a pile beside his body. I rolled him over so I could look down at his beautiful body. “Like what you see?” he asked with a hint of a smile.

“Always,” I told him and ran a hand down his chest, tracing his abdomen with gentle fingers. A quick intake of breath let me know what he thought of my touch. I grinned and placed a kiss where my fingers had just been. A breath hissed through his teeth and he rolled me back over, pinning me to the floor with his body.

“You are such a little minx,” he laughed and kissed me again. I reached up and fisted my hands in his hair, holding him to me. Hell, neither of us needed to breathe so it didn’t matter how long we kissed. His hand trailed down my waist, caressing the bare skin and making me shiver. His tongue invaded my mouth and I willingly gave mine up to tangle with his. The way Edward kissed me should be illegal; it made my whole body scream with need.

I decided to remind him of how badly I needed him and I wrapped my legs around him, pulling him into me. He still didn’t react so I growled. “Edward, you are going to kill me,” I said arching into him.

“I can’t ever deny you anything my sweet, Bella,” he whispered into my lips and entered me with a deep thrust that I felt all the way to my bones. I cried out in pleasure and arched my hips up to meet his thrusts. Making love to Edward was a heaven I didn’t deserve. He seemed to know every inch of my body and where to kiss and touch to heighten my arousal. The way he filled me up made me want to sob with the extreme beauty of it. My beautiful husband was the only lover I could ever want.

“More,” I cried, my voice cracking on a dry sob. He thrust harder, deeper and I felt the beginnings of my climax creeping over me.

“Like that, Bella? Tell me, love, how do you want it?” he asked. His voice was breathless from exertion; I could hear the need there.

“Just like that,” I panted. Our bodies were synchronized, perfectly matched in rhythm. I could tell he was as close as I was to release. I urged his body on with mine, letting my hands roam over his body, caressing his muscular physique. “You are so beautiful,” I whispered.

On cue, as if my words had sent him over the edge, he came and a moment later I felt my own climax. The pleasure rocketed through my body, each nerve ending catching fire and exploding with an incredible force that left me breathless beneath Edward.

After a few moments I reached up and ran a hand through his beautiful hair. Even now I couldn’t stop touching him. It was like a magnetic pull kept dragging me toward him, but I loved it. I loved to touch and kiss him, he was mine.

He lifted his head up and gazed into my eyes. “That was amazing…” He seemed to be at a loss for words, I knew I was. Something had been different that time but I couldn’t quite put my finger on it. It had been more intense, more desperate, was that it? Or was it something else entirely? We continue to lie on the forest floor while we tried to come to our senses a bit.

“Are you ready to go back home?” I asked him, still running my fingers through his bronze hair. He was lying on my chest, his head pillowed on my breasts. He did this so he could turn his face and kiss them whenever he felt the urge. I didn’t stop him; it was actually exciting me enough to be ready for more. I felt though that he was still a little hesitant to start back up so I said nothing while I waited for him to make a decision.

“The others are worried about us, Alice told them we needed some time to be alone, but she mentioned how odd you looked at the end of the day. Esme is going to start looking for us in about five minutes,” he said. He didn’t make a move to get up though.

“Edward, are you okay?” I asked him. I sat up and took a good look at him. The circles under his eyes were darker than usual, definitely darker than they were this morning. “Edward?”

“I think I need to hunt, come with me?” he asked and held out his hand.

“Shouldn’t we get dressed first?” I pointed at the pile of clothes beside him. He looked at them and then back to me.

“You know, I think I’d like to see you hunt in the nude.”

I rolled my eyes and grabbed my clothes. “If you are trying to make sure I don’t get blood on them you could just say so. I’m not as messy an eater as I used to be.”

He watched me get dressed with an odd expression on his face. It was a mixture of hunger and frustration, something I rarely saw anymore. It was familiar because he had looked at me that way often when I was human. “Let’s hurry so we can get back home. Alice will tell them we went hunting.”

He changed quickly and then sprinted into the woods, leaving me to follow behind him, wondering what was bothering him.

“Edward, wait!” I called after him but he was like a bullet, pushing himself harder than I had ever seen. He darted through the trees, jumping over bushes and other things in his way. It frightened me to see him so focused, something was very wrong. “Edward!”

I pushed myself harder as well, trying to catch up with him. I smelled it then, a heard of deer just up ahead. I had seen the dark circles under Edward’s eye, possibly his thirst was too strong. That would explain his determination to hunt, but would he ever be focused enough to ignore me? I reached the edge of the clearing where the deer were feeding and saw Edward hidden in the shadows, ready to pounce.

I couldn’t move, I just watched the sinuous beauty of his body as he leaped through the air and wrestled a deer to the ground. His teeth tore into the neck, feasting on the blood of the animal. The smell was powerful, overwhelming but still I couldn’t move. There was a wildness in Edward’s eyes I had never seen before… it frightened me.

It didn’t take him long to drain the animal dry and toss it aside. He locked eyes with mine and I could see fierce desperation, thirst and most of all hunger. “Edward?” I asked cautiously, taking a tentative step toward him. My hand reached out to him but he ignored it. He pounced at me, knocking me to the ground roughly. Before I could demand to know what was going on he silenced me with a kiss. I could still taste the blood on his lips, in his mouth and it turned me on.

I rolled him over so I was straddling him, looking down into his perfect face. “Bella, please, I need you,” he voice frantic with need. The circles under his eyes were still dark, much to dark to be right. We had just hunted yesterday; he shouldn’t have needed to feed for days at least.

I touched the bruise like hollows under his eyes. “You need to hunt,” I told him gently. I didn’t want to hunt, I wanted to make love to him again but I was worried about him. He looked exhausted, something I had never believed I would see.

“Later,” he said and fumbled with the hem of my shirt.

“Edward,” I put my hands on his, stopping him from doing what we both desperately wanted, “You can’t see what I see. You look awful, you need to hunt now.”

A strangled cry escaped his throat and he covered his eyes with his hands. “What’s wrong with me?” he asked hoarsely. I crawled off him, stood up and helped him to his feet. Once standing he wrapped his arms around me, holding me close to his chest.

“I promise, after we hunt I’ll take you home and we will lock our door. Trust me, you’ll be begging me to stop,” I teased, pressing a kiss to his chest. He squeezed me tight and then let me go, keeping my hand clasped tightly in his.

We stood still and breathed in the air of the woods. The deer had scattered after Edward’s first meal, but we located them to the north about half a mile. Edward didn’t let go of my hand as we ran, the wind blowing like a caress against us. I loved to run, other than being with Edward and the rest of my family forever; it was the thing I loved most about being a vampire. There was nothing that could compare to the feel of the wind in my hair, the ground disappearing underneath my feet. If I wasn’t worried about Edward this would have been the perfect moment.

We slowed as we heard the beating hearts of the deer in the forest ahead of us. “There are five of them up ahead,” he whispered to me and I nodded. We had to quickly take them down or they would scatter, I didn’t think Edward would agree to postpone our evening plans again.

We stalked slowly and silently toward the deer. There were three on the edge of some bushes, grazing and looking around nervously at every sound. I could feel the venom flood my mouth as I smelled the blood of the deer. It wasn’t as appetizing as human blood, but I found it preferable to taking a human life. This herd had the distinct smell of sage in their blood, I knew it would color the taste, but I also knew Edward was too thirsty to be picky just now.

He crouched low, his eyes on the Buck that had just entered the woods behind the three doe in front of us. Edward shifted his position, deciding to go for the big game instead of the animals so close to us. Without warning he pounced like a jungle cat, catching the buck by his antlers and taking him down. The doe began to scatter, frightened by the attack on the buck. I took my chance and caught one as they fled out of our part of the forest. I wasn’t thirsty, but I wanted to have an extra just in case Edward needed another.

I watched as his lips touched the animal’s neck; to someone who didn’t know what we were it would look like he was kissing it. I watched intently, wondering if he had always looked that beautiful as he fed. During his rebellious years so many decades ago, had he looked that seductive and graceful as he fed from the human vermin of the Chicago alleys? Watching him I had to say yes. No matter what he was doing it was always beautiful, graceful and alluring.

He drained the animal dry and then looked up into my eyes. I felt relief course through me at the sight of his warm, honey gold eyes. No longer did he have the dark, frightening circles that made him look weak and exhausted. He smiled at me and came to my side, taking my hand again. “Aren’t you thirsty?” he asked, pointing to the doe I still had cradled in my other arm. I looked down at it and felt my throat catch fire. I was a little thirsty…

Edward waited patiently while I slated my own thirst. I cringed as the taste of the blood hit my mouth; it was strong with the taste of sage, just as I had known it would be. It didn’t matter though, once the blood began coursing down my throat I felt instant relief. It didn’t take long to drink my fill; after all, I wasn’t as thirsty as Edward had been. I stood up, dropping the animal to the ground and then looked back at my husband. He smiled my very favorite crooked smile.

“You have a little bit of blood right here,” he told me, pointing to my right cheek. I made a move to wipe it away but Edward was quicker. He leaned down and flicked his tongue out, touching my skin. It was over quickly, but it made my body thrum with heat once again.

“We really need to get home,” I said shakily. He laughed the sound husky and sensual.

“Ah, my Bella, you really do have a one track mind,” he teased.

“Edward!” I gasped, “What about you? Fifteen minutes ago you nearly ripped off my clothes to get to me.”

He raised his eyebrow in disbelief. “Don’t be absurd, I have much better self control than that. Come one, I’ll race you home.”

He took off running, not waiting for me to argue the point with him. It didn’t really matter but it did bother me a bit. What was going on today? First at school when I couldn’t control myself in the lunch room and then in the woods, after our lovemaking Edward had seemed strange, not himself. Now he was saying I was being absurd? What in the hell was going on?


~*~

Alice was waiting at the door when we made it home. It took us a little longer because Edward was in a playful mood and suggested I ride on his back like I had when I was human. I wanted to run, but I wanted to wrap my legs around him even more. It had been just like old times, feeling Edward running as smoothly as if he had been strolling along the forest, the wind blowing my hair. The best feeling of course was the way Edward was pressed tight against me, his back hard and perfect.

She gave us an odd sort of smile as Edward set me down on the ground again. “Feeling nostalgic?” she asked him and Edward grinned at her.

“Maybe a little,” he admitted. He wrapped one arm around my waist and then another around Alice’s shoulders. “So, were you sent to wait for us?”
Alice laughed, “Esme was worried when you guys didn’t come home soon after we did. I explained that you two had had a rough day and needed some time to yourselves. I have to admit I was surprised when you went hunting again, what happened with that?” Edward went rigid and Alice turned to face him, alarm spreading over her perfect features. “Edward?”

“He just needed to release some tension before we got back home, right, Edward?” I said and Edward nodded in response.

“It was a rough day like you said, I just needed a release,” he lied smoothly and then walked through the doors, leaving Alice and I alone at the front door. She turned to me then, her eyes full of suspicion.

“What’s going on?” she demanded. “I’ve never seen Edward act like that before.”

I pulled Alice away from the house to give us a bit of privacy. I bit my lip, an old nervous habit I had had during my human years. Instantly I regretted it when a sharp pain jolted through my lip. I had forgotten how sharp my teeth were.

Alice stomped her foot impatiently and I snapped back to what I had pulled her out here for. “I don’t know what happened, Alice. We ran out into the forest and then stopped to well… you know,” I paused and she nodded, “There was something different about it. I can’t put my finger on it, but it wasn’t like normal. Afterwards his eyes were black and he had the dark circles under his eyes. He fed but it wasn’t enough. He looked crazed!”

“I saw him attack you…” Alice began uncertainly and I shook my head.

“I don’t know what came over him. One second he is feeding from a deer and the next he is trying to rip off my shirt. I’ve never seen that look in his eyes, it terrified me. I convinced him to hunt again and afterward he was back to normal, what do you think is wrong?” I asked. I was worried about him, about me. What was wrong with us today?

“Hmm, don’t worry about it right now. I guess go about things like normal, if it happens again we will ask Carlisle,” she suggested. “Now, if I know Edward he is standing right inside the doorway waiting for you so he can carry you upstairs.”

I sighed and nodded. It probably wasn’t anything to worry about, it was just one day. Like Edward told me before when we were passing notes, it was probably just the stress of the first day of school. It was bound to throw me for a loop, right? A small voice in my head disagreed, “But what about Edward’s reaction later?” As hard as I tried I couldn’t come up with an answer. Instead I walked inside the house, fell into Edward’s arms and let him carry me up the stairs just as Alice had predicted.

Edward carried me to our bed, his eyes locked on mine. There was no trace of the need and frustration I had seen in them earlier. There was love and passion, but that was all. I felt like I was on a rollercoaster today, my emotions rising and falling as quickly as a car on a speeding track. Once again I felt the rush of relief wash over me as Edward kissed me tenderly. There was no urgency here, no worry or desperation. It was just the two of us, our hearts full to bursting with love for the other. This was the sort of lovemaking I liked best, when we weren’t rushed and we had all night to enjoy each other.

“I love you,” I whispered against his lips.

“As I love you, my Bella,” he replied. We didn’t speak again after that, we didn’t need to. Every word we wanted to say could be said with a touch, a kiss, a caress. I saw all of the words I needed to hear in his eyes. The way he looked at me let me know that he loved me, that I was his entire world… just as he was mine.

He trailed kisses down my neck, over collar bone and down my chest until he reached the neckline of my blouse. Ever so gently he grabbed the bottom of my blouse and pulled it up over my head. My bra was next, leaving my breasts exposed to his ever searching lips and tongue. Like before in the forest, I didn’t even realize when he removed his own clothes and finished undressing me. My husband was incredibly talented at holding my attention while attending to other tasks.

He lavished kisses upon my body, leaving the skin tingling when he moved on to other areas. I entwined my fingers in his hair, sighing and moaning with each touch. I knew there were others in the house but I couldn’t bring myself to care enough about them to be quiet. Edward had told me once that my moans of pleasure were the most beautiful sounds in his world. I wasn’t going to shut up just so a few other people would feel more comfortable. This moment was all about Edward and I, nothing else.

He moved his lips back up to mine and kissed me lazily as though he had all the time in the world to make love to me. But suddenly it wasn’t enough for me, I didn’t just want him anymore I needed him. It was the same feeling that had come over me during lunch and it scared me. I couldn’t stop myself; I threw myself into the kiss. It wasn’t just a lazy kiss anymore; it was a mind blowing, tongue dueling, soul searching prelude to what I wanted… and he wasn’t giving it to me fast enough.

He pushed me away gently, caught my chin and forced me to meet his eyes. “Bella, relax, we have all afternoon and all night,” he reminded me. He stroked my cheek softly, attempting I think to calm me, but it wasn’t working. Every second I looked into his warm golden eyes I sunk deeper and deeper into the feeling that had taken over me.

“Edward, please,” I whimpered, “Please.”

I knew that when I asked he couldn’t resist me anything. He had always wanted to give me everything I asked for, so on the rare occasions that I did ask for things he couldn’t stop himself from giving in. I knew it was cheating, but I needed him so badly at that moment that I didn’t care. I saw the resolve to keep our lovemaking slow and poignant shatter inside him and he groaned in surrender.

“I love you, Bella,” he whispered in my ear as he plunged deep inside me. I cried out, arching against him and digging my nails into his back. That first point of friction nearly caused me to come off the bed with the force of pleasure that rocked me. Edward gasped, obviously feeling it too.

“Don’t stop,” I begged in a broken voice. I remembered our lovemaking in the forest an hour ago and though it had been the most incredible sex we had ever had… this was still better, even after just one thrust.

“I don’t think I could stop now,” he admitted and thrust again. Quickly we found our rhythm. Edward and I had always had a special connection, from the very first time we had ever made love things had just clicked between us. He had known what I wanted and needed and I, in turn, knew exactly what he needed. With Edward it was just like dancing, as effortless as standing on his feet and letting him whirl me around the floor. The only difference is that in this kind of dancing I was an all but too eager participant.

My body rose and fell in time with his, our breathing fast and ragged. If you had asked me yesterday if Edward and my sex life could get any better I would have laughed. Today I was screaming, screaming the pleasure I felt at the top of my lungs. Even the smallest movement of his body sent spasms of intense pleasure through my body. “Edward,” I moaned and he chuckled breathlessly.

“I know, love. Trust me, I know.”

Edward quickened our pace, and suddenly breathing was impossible. I could feel my climax rising up again, so much more powerful than I had ever felt. “Edward?” I whimpered again.

“Don’t fight it, Bella,” he said hoarsely. His jaw was clenched with the tension I knew must be straining through his body. I broke through the sensual haze that I was drowning in and touched his face, my fingers tracing the perfect planes of his cheek bones. He shuddered under my touch and I felt his release a moment before my own hit me.

I felt like my heart started beating again when the power of my climax rocked through my body. My body thrummed to life, a scream ripping from my throat. Edward whispered my name over and over, so gently that I could hear “I love you” laced in every syllable. When my body stopped shaking and I could speak without stuttering, I looked into Edward’s eyes.

Every ounce of satisfaction drained from me as I saw my worst nightmare in his eyes. Once again, like earlier in the forest his eyes were a flat black and the circles were back. “Bella?” he whispered hoarsely, “What is happening to me?”

“I don’t know, but something is very, very wrong.”

A knock at the door surprised us both. “Edward, Bella?”

It was Alice… I was right, something was very, very wrong.