The last solstice

Chapter 16: The first step


The first ten minutes were one of the most awkward moments Nocturnal Mirage has ever experienced. Since he entered the sanctuary of the solar Princess, none of them said a word to each other. Celestia lay on the sofa immovably, observing the stallion with penetrating eyes and mild inquiry. The delirious, weird flame has disappeared from her purple iris, only now Mirage could acknowledge how all-pervading the alicorn’s look truly is. He felt like he’s staring into a deep well with crystal clear water on the bottom. The Princess’ aura was much more different than last time. She resembled the several depictions Mirage saw of the regal mare, when he was a young colt.

Even in this pose, Celestia’s majestic figure dominated the earth pony’s field of vision. Her mane and tail billowed gently in the colors of an early spring blush, when the winter coldness still rules the land, but the resurgence is present in the background. The luminous hair charitably shielded the right side of her face and chest, but as Mirage’s eyes traveled downwards he recognized the scars on alicorn’s hoof. Celestia narrowed her eyes a little, following the blue stallion’s glance. She crossed her hooves, so that the burnt wounds could not be seen again. Mirage noticed her gesture and quickly looked elsewhere.

The silence sit upon the room like heavy fog, the only sound was the sound of raindrops knocking on the glass. None of them knew how to start the conversation. After a few minutes the earth pony realized he’s still holding onto the book tightly, like if it was a newborn foal. He was about to ask where could he put it down, but the Princess was faster.

“Third self from the floor. On the right.” Celestia stated emotionlessly.

Mirage nodded and walked to the bookshelves. He put the tome back to its place and dwelled on the collection of the sun goddess. There were at least a thousand books in the room, carefully selected by category. Mirage got dizzy from looking at the titles. “Universal Laws of Magic, 10 000 spells and incantations, Advanced Spells, Archaic Equine Philosophy, Equestrian History I.-IV., The Dark Ages of Chaos, Classic Drama, The Mysterious Realm of the Mind, Super-Naturals, Complex Potions, Known Equine Diseases and Remedies, Conflict Management, Equestrian Foreign Policy, Equestrian Law I.-VII., Equine Art from pre-celestial to neo-equestrian, The Founding of Equestria" and many more. Several rare tomes like the works of Clover the Clever and Starswirl the Bearded.

Based on her book collection, Mirage could tell the Princess had an extensive range of interest. He got lost admiring Celestia’s private library, and didn’t notice the white alicorn locked her eyes on him.

“Seventh shelf, 24th book.” she said shortly.

Mirage obeyed, took out the book and read the title: “Known Constellations and planets”. He looked at Celestia again. The solar alicorn nodded a little and pointed to a large, dusty table not far from the sofa. The cobalt stallion understood he was offered a seat, so he pulled out the chair and sat down, still feeling a bit awkward about the Princess following his every move.

“You’re not so good with ponies anymore, are you, Princess?” it was an instinctive question and Mirage regretted opening his mouth.

“One step at a time! If you want to do this, you have to let me get used to your presence first. It takes time. I’ve been all alone in this room for ten years.” Celestia replied softly with a little bit of sharpness coloring her tone.

It was a logical answer and now Mirage understood the sun goddess requires company, but only for reading together. He opened the book, but it was too dark in the room. The rain still assaulted the windows vehemently and the thick storm clouds above Canterlot blocked out most of the light. The stallion glanced at the Princess once again, when he thought she wouldn’t notice.

The solar alicorn returns to her book, taking small sips of red wine every once in a while. A few minutes pass by and Celestia recognizes the earth pony’s problem eventually. She doesn’t say anything, but gets up, lights a candle and puts it on Mirage’s table. The royal blue stallion finds it odd that the Princess doesn’t use any of her magic, to perform this task. His curiosity resurrects in his soul.

“Thank you… But... why didn’t you use magic, Princess? It would have been less trouble for you…”

Celestia quickly turns around, her mane swirls around her.

“You’re starting to abuse my hospitality, Guardian.” she declares coldly with a cutting glance.

They glare at each other for some length and seeing that Mirage remains silent, Celestia considers the case closed and returns to the sofa. The cobalt pony pretends to be reading, but she glances at the snow white alicorn every minute. The calm atmosphere gives him the opportunity to take a closer look on the Princess of the Sun. The first thing he notices how skinny she is. The stallion can clearly see her ribs on the sides. Her large wings flutter randomly for no particular reason and it appears that Celestia’s not aware of this uncontrollable movement.

Her forever flowing mane and tail seems to be much longer than in the depictions and looks like the Princess hasn’t shown any attention to her hair for years. Several sparkly locks fall into her face, and on her swan-like neck. She doesn’t have her golden royal jewelry on. Mirage wonders where they could be, since he did not see them anywhere in the suite. The dark blue stallion ponders over this ambivalent figure, which is full of grace, might, wisdom, but doubt, uncertainty and confusion also radiates from her being. Questions begin to attack Mirage’s mind from every direction.

What could have happened to her? What did she have to go through to make her turn her back on everything she believed in and the kingdom she ruled over for more than a millennia? What could have possibly made those scars on her? Why did she let me in here? What does she want? Why doesn’t she use her magic? What happened ten years ago? What’s this all about? I have to know!

The more time he spends gazing at the Princess, the more distant his hatred toward her feels. What happened at the Crystal Palace was so long ago… and the presence of this mare feels so close. So… real. Even in her current state, she cannot deny she’s royalty. It’s in her blood. It’s in her motions, her gestures, her mannerisms. Like how she holds that goblet and how she takes a lady-like sip from the red wine from it. The way she turns the pages… always with her left hoof. But the fall is the hardest from the top. And she fell from heavenly altitudes.

Based on the unpredictable behavior she’s shown over the last three months, Mirage could not decide whether the Princess forces this sudden calmness on herself, or not. One thing is sure though: she’s a broken spirit. It’s written all over her, especially in the resigned look of her eyes. The stallion knew how expressive Celestia’s purple eyes are. He still remembers the first time he looked into those eyes through the keyhole.

The sun goddess turns the page and Mirage winces by the soft noise. His face turns ashen, because he realizes he was so lost in his thoughts, and didn’t notice Celestia was returning the look for some time now. She doesn’t speak, but a pale smile passes through her face for a glimpse. Then she reads further. The cobalt earth pony feels he’s pressed his luck as far as he could, so he turns his attention to the book. None of them say a word whole afternoon, they just read together.

Hours later, Mirage glances at the wooden wall clock. He closes the book and the alicorn of the Sun recoils a bit, like if the noise was hurting her senses.

“Well, thank you for sharing this pleasant afternoon with me, Princess, but my shift’s almost over. I have to go now.” Mirage says quietly.

“Yes. You may keep the book.” Celestia replies, there’s still no sign of any emotion on her alabaster features.

“Thank you. But I’d rather read it with you, if you allow me to.”

The solar goddess gulps, she clearly hesitates.

“So be it.” she eventually gives an answer.

The cobalt stallion nods and trots out of her suite. When the door closes behind him and the spell that’s keeping everypony out reactivates, Celestia looks around the room. She feels relief and… the lack of something at the same time.

The guardian was so quiet all the time, she forgot he was even there. It was like; he’s become a part of the room. He tried his best to respect her wishes and play by her rules and the Sun Princess appreciated that. That pale smile appears on her face once more as she recalls how the stallion looked at her. There was no judgement or fear in those emerald eyes, just curiosity and inquiry.

“Hmm… interesting…” she mumbles to herself.

Little did Celestia or Mirage knew somepony else saw the cobalt stallion coming out of the suite of the sun goddess. This pony trotted down from the Ivory Tower, and found her way into Luna’s room. Before she entered, she dropped the invisibility spell. Two faces turned toward her at once.

“Cadence!” Twilight called out in joy.

“You look excited. What happened?” Luna asked.

“I have good news.” the pink alicorn smiled dubiously. “Our plan seems to be working. He’s in.”