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Sinna_Hime_chan said:
OH GAH!
I am so sorry. That is really terrible for you I am SURE, & hurts, especially IF she marries the S.O.B. you'd be stuck around him the rest of your life or length of the marriage! You'd HAVE to get over it or it could drive an awful wedge between you & your sister or make the relationship "awkward."
You really NEED to talk to "her" about this. If appealing to her feelings does not work, at least she'll know & be aware. I know you are going to have to accept it, but it is really not easy...easier said than done. TEN YEARS is a long time & you already feel like the guy is a "jerk" because you have "known" him & "jerk" marrying into fam-not good-making babies combined with your fam blood-no jerk babies! lol (Try not to take it out on any poss future nieces or nephews & just love & be good anyway-try, (I am sure you would), because was comes around goes around & it won't be babies fault, BUT it has NOT come to that yet & if the guy truly IS a jerk maybe she'll come to see that of her own.)
I have never had to face that problem. My sister is over 12 years older than me -and even at 18 or so when her boyfriends loved on me, hugged & kissed me and said they thought I would grow up to be pretty or a "knock out" (when I was just a small chubby LITTLE pre-K-er child, even that made my sister jealous, (she later told me). 0.0
I am more considerate of my GIRLFRIENDS & we are not even people who HAVE to be together in our lives, but I would think as family she should care how you feel or at least be able to talk.
I understand if she feels differently, and what is hard is that you may have to practice some hardcore understanding too which could make things VERY hard on you. that said, you need to seek your own support and supportive friends who can love you through this. It's rough. I think it is even rougher- not the guy, but the facts of the matter when you are not okay with it & how it might hurt the relationship between you & your sister & that she is willing to do that putting the guy before YOU.
I don't know you, but I would not think anyone deserves that...just to let you know. I think sometimes it is just more a case of people being very selfish & only seeing from their own point of view-wanting what they want. I can see not wanting to throw away love, but she did not start out in-love & she may be jeopardizing a sibling over a lover that may not stay "in-love" or even last. I can't say as it sounds like a good decision. I know it happens, & maybe it can & has worked out for others (You), so there is always hope. If you pray, I would pray about it. Who knows, maybe there is a lesson in there for each to learn, or a reason.
I am just sorry that you are going through this & I WOULD seek to hear from those who have had this exact thing happen to them & see how they handled the process of dealing with it.
I know you are hurt, try not to add to your pain.
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