Helloooo fellow Huddyholics! So...the premiere. Need I say more about it? It was simply a dream come true. I have to say, though, I've only been waiting for this all summer. A lot of other people have been waiting for it for 7 years, so I have to tell those people: wow, you guys are amazing. I really do respect you for that, and your dedicatedness makes me feel very inferior...

Anyways, no surprise, I'm rambling again. The reason I decided to write this article is because I really need to just get my thoughts on the premiere out somewhere. So, here I am, watching the episode for the third time, and writing this.

Alright, iTunes, House S7 Ep1, here we goooooo-

***

Okay, recap of S6 right now. As "Help Me" was pretty much my sustenance throughout the summer I don't really need to pay attention right now...

Quick flashback: when the first new scene of the premiere started (House and Cuddy's hands), I actually do remember my hands shaking. I guess it was the Huddy withdrawal that I had been going through all summer (older eps, Huddy Youtube vids, etc. sustained me, but just barely: they were bland prison food to the premiere's gourmet love-meal), but when the first scene started I'm pretty sure it put me in a dream-like state. I felt drunk or high or something (I do NOT drink or do drugs, don't worry), and it was only during the second time I watched the ep that I realized Chase had asked Thirteen to have sex with him...alright, well that turned into a LONG flashback. Bear with me...

Back to the premiere: (just a note: expect to find absolutely NO coherent thoughts here)

Ooh, hand-holding of S6, about to transition to--

Aaaaahhhhh hand-stroking...a lot of caressing in this ep, no?

Wow, House is bloodier than I remembered...and dustier. And wilder-looking.

Pure love at the way he looks at his hand and clenches it, like he's remembering the way Cuddy's hand felt in his...

Music is beautiful, by the way. Sounds like period drama music...I like it.

And there goes the shirt. I love the way they decided to get House and Cuddy's clothes off...no passionate ripping-off-of-garments. Just slow and romantic and oh so sweet.

Ahaha saw my own reflection on the screen--basically it looked like this :o

Oh jeez, I love the way he looks at her. House literally does not take his eyes of Cuddy in this scene. Ever. His expression...it looks like he's still deciding whether or not she's really there. Also looks like he's in awe.

Huh. Confused: does House think Cuddy's going to do the, erm, (dirty-thought) thing when she unbuttons his pants? Or does he know it's something to do with the scar?

Aaahhh the way he says "Don't...don't" just gets me every time. House is so vulnerable here...

Alright, there goes the "I love you" again. Gets important later on...

Promo scene! Staring into each other's eyes. And then...cue make out.

When House takes Cuddy's shirt off, has anyone noticed how he just gazes at her for a moment, as if trying to really take in how beautiful she is? And that this is the first time he's seen her shirtless in...well actually, a REALLY long time.

Another promo scene: neck kissing.

Woah woah woah, when House picks Cuddy up, does he kiss her shoulder? There's definitely a kiss sound, but it could just be Cuddy kissing his neck...

Now it's Cuddy's turn to do the staring-in-awe thing...okay, more promo scenes (sex scenes now). Hey, where are the other ones from the promos?! DAMN YOU DELETED SCENES! YOU'RE SO INFURIATING.

Still, love the way they're lips just barely brush against each other...

Wait what? It's over? Okay, this is my big beef with the opening scene: yes, it was beautiful, yes I loved it, but the sex scene was WAY too short. And also edited weird. The whole thing, combined with the "So now what?" scene, and then the quick cut to the opening credits, made it feel like a cut scene in a video game. Sorry for bringing some negativity into this, but just had to put it out there...

Aah, Hugh's hand dangerously close to Lisa's chest.

The "stay here" sounds different from the promo one--different take? Yess...imagining many many many takes of these, particularly the sexy ones...

Got a little off-topic there. Ahem. Continue.

House's snarkiness is back! Yes! But I have to say, I love Cuddy's new assistant. He's adorable.

Lisa's hair looks really good, by the way. :D

Alright, sneak-peek team scene. Taub-Foreman-Taub-Chase-Thirteen-Taub-Chase--you know what, just give me the next Huddy scene already!!! I'm sorry, but whatever Thirteen's big mystery is, it's gonna have to live with not really being important for now.

Ahah, but Chase and Foreman are annoyingly nosy.

Huh. House has a painting/photo of hands. Didn't notice that the first two times I watched this.

"I was in a mood"--indeed, House.

Aww, loving House's many uses of "we" and "us"--"we are more important than the hospital", "let's give the morning to us"...and of course his tender expression when he says "Thank you".

Nurse Jeffrey! Haha xD

Jesus, Lisa's legs look good. Having those legs at 44 cannot be easy...the effect of many many early-morning angry squirrels, I think?

Wow. Hugh's a lot taller than Lisa...never really saw that before. But I'm liking it.

Massage time!

Hahah, Old Spice for the magical bath? And uh...mouthwash?

Oh, Foreman. Just leave Thirteen alone. She's playing pool, for God's sake! If nothing else, THAT requires some privacy.

Ahhhhh bath scene. Hmm, is that Cuddy's left hand? House looking at her ringless finger, perhaps? Brings to mind a certain other person who remains ringless, but THAT belongs to another spot.

Aww loved it when House put his chin on the top of Cuddy's head. And the laugh at the end was definitely Lisa E, not Cuddy...

The "sock and a photograph" scene just disturbed me slightly...don't really want to visualize that. At least House gets the real thing now!

Okay, okay, hospital stuff...

Champagne scene was pretty cute. Once again, the laughs really look like Hugh and Lisa, not just Huddy.

Ahahahah someone snorted. Lisa, I think.

Ooh, Wilson! Hey, I missed youuu.

"I think he finally left. But just in case he hasn't, what can we do that does not involve talking...?"

Aaahhh adorable scene. He really does always want to kiss her, doesn't he. And his happy face...:D It makes me happy.

Dammit, Wilson! Stop interrupting them!

Alright, sneak-peek scene. Memorized all the lines already...

Love the way he looks at her after he hangs up on the phone, like "Hmm how about we finish what we started..."

How many times did Hugh and Lisa have to kiss while shooting this? I'm thinking...about 25% of the time was spent making out. And I'm pretty sure they thoroughly enjoyed that 25% ;)

Ahah Richardson looks like a zombie.

Wow. That gasp was LOUD. It actually sort of shocks me every time...I'm pretty sure Hugh would NOT have been comfortable with this scene two years ago.

Jeez, lots of panting...

Aw, I love how Hugh/House rubs his face against Lisa's back. And then caresses it...he really does enjoy touching a tad too much, eh?

Wow again. Hugh looks pretty smokin' here.

Ooh, awkward Chase/Thirteen scene. Oh, Chase. You awkward, adorable little Aussie. And Thirteen's expression is priceless xD

"Wow, that lamp is shiny!" Haha I could see this Richardson guy (while he's high on the seafood of course) really growing on me.

Hmm, sex tape? DVD bonus features? I think so...

WILSON! I really did miss him...House slowly pulling him from the window on the table made me smile xD

Oh Cuddy, why must you hide? Just complicates things...

House's expression: Ah. Hey Cuddy! How's the weather in the closet?

Haha Taub's slight eye-roll is beautiful.

Oh House. Way to subtly change the subject by randomly picking up Boggle.

Ahaha Richardson's little striptease made me laugh. And his waddling down the hallway..."Woodstock, baby!" xD

Cuddy says "love" five times in 30 seconds. House, the least you can do is say it once...

ILOB3YOU

Sooo effing cute :)

Wow. Hugh's eyes. Are. Stunning.

Aww, I love how obsessed House was and is with Cuddy. Almost stalkerishly so. Finding out what her screensaver was and then keeping it for all those years? Now THAT is dedication.

The beach scene is in France? I'm liking that idea...

"The hospital does not need your body. I do." :D

Is the France-trip-planning scene the scene that one of the reviewers was referring to when he said something along the lines of "there's a scene near the end that makes it apparent that House and Cuddy are going to have problems"?

Ahahah Richardson-Foreman-Thirteen love-shake. Love it.

Oh, how I love the little Huddy kisses. So incredibly sweet.

And oh my God, just noticed how he smiles at her.

Hm. Did House lock the door?

House's miserable expression as Cuddy leaves...*sigh* Here come the heart-wrenching feelings again.

"This isn't gonna work"?? Ugh, House, WHY must you do this to yourself???

Well, I forgive you. Because your insecurity and perpetual pessimism actually led to the most beautiful scene of the premiere...and probably of any episode of any TV show I've ever watched.

No, I do NOT want another hospital scene!!! But, I must say, Thirteen's sad expression when she hugged Chase sort of gave me a sense of foreboding. Like she expects not to really see him again for a while...maybe even never. But now, back to the Huddyness...

Okay, I really have to devote the rest of this (really, really long) article to this scene. Because, even though reviewers have talked about the beauty and emotional-ness of the first scene, this one really took my breath away. And made me want to cry. And broke my heart.

The best part of it really starts when House says, so softly, "Tell me where I'm wrong." He's just so afraid of screwing things up, of not being all that Cuddy expects him to be, of finally letting himself love someone again...I don't think he was asking her to actually prove him wrong. I think House was already so convinced that he was right, that he and Cuddy could never work, that he was just imploring her to see what he saw. He is willing to give up his chance at, as he sees it, temporary happiness, so he can save her from what he believes is inevitable. And for a moment, it looks like he's succeeding.

But really, Cuddy loves him. She said it, and she means it. It's not just attraction, fascination, whatever...in her eyes, House really is "the most incredible man she has ever known". And most importantly, she doesn't want or expect him to change.

It's in that moment, when he sees how much Cuddy means what she is saying, that House realizes he can't let her go. He can't pull what he did with Stacy and make himself miserable just to feel like a better person. And as Cuddy takes his hand and kisses him, he latches onto her hand like it's all he's got left. You can see how tightly he grips her fingers, like it's the only thing keeping him from falling, like he never wants to let go. And it's in that moment that House realizes that he'll really, truly mean it with all of his heart when he says "I love you."

The three words that he couldn't say throughout the episode, even after Cuddy tells him she loves him twice...when House finally says them it sounds as if they were torn from his throat. Like they slipped out and he tried to snatch them back before they got out, but they just slipped through his fingertips...

And then he realizes that maybe it's okay to be scared. Maybe it's okay that he's damaged and unfixable, screwed up...maybe it's okay for him to take a chance with Cuddy. Of course, there will always be the risk that it'll end badly, that his heart will just be broken yet again. But then again, there's also the possibility that he's finally found someone who can put it back together.

Well, there are two other scenes after this, but not really much to talk about. Even though they continue the Thirteen mystery, and the mystery of the Huddy future, respectively, the episode really ended for me with the "I love you/hand-gripping" scene. Of course, the end of the last scene, where House and Cuddy's smiles slowly fade into slightly worried expressions, is supposed to show that they know there will be problems. But come on. This is House, not Cinderella. This was to be expected. A happy ending to the ep would have been wonderful, of course, but also too fairytale-ish. So I'm just going to enjoy Huddy, and all the problems that come with it, for as long as it lasts.

Aaahhhh, that was terribly long. If you're still with me (you aren't), then bravo to you. I'm actually really tired now...I guess I'll watch THE scene (the one I wrote an essay about, you know which one) a couple more times before sleeping...well, have a wonderful Huddy-fantasy-filled morning/noon/afternoon/evening/night! :D