Even though I’m in the midst of writing a multi-chapter fic, this one shot kind of came to me out of nowhere. It’s my take on what happened directly after “Help Me.” Enjoy!
House and Cuddy had been in House’s bathroom for only a couple minutes (to them time had stopped) when Cuddy started to yawn. House pulled away from her lips, and Cuddy looked up at him, somewhat sheepishly.
“I guess…I’m kind of tired.” Cuddy yawned widely again and, as if on cue, House yawned widely as well. Cuddy giggled a little and House couldn’t help but smile.
“We need to re-bandage you,” Cuddy yawned again and left the room, returning with some gauze and bandages. She sat House down on the toilet seat and silently began working. House just stared up at her, still a little dazed. Cuddy could sense him staring but it didn’t make her uncomfortable.
Finally House spoke. “What about…Lucas?”
Cuddy looked down at him, expecting anger or bitterness in his face but it was purely questioning if not…caring.
Cuddy bit her lip and continued bandaging his shoulder. “He uh….he was pretty broken up about it.”
House looked down at his hands. “I understand.” Cuddy, again surprised at House’s response, stared at him for another couple of seconds before returning to her work. “I thought you hated him?” Cuddy tried.
House was silent for a little while and Cuddy continued to work, giving him time to answer the question. She finished up his shoulder and was putting the supplies away in her bag when he finally spoke. “I guess I just resented…that he was smarter than me. He got to you first.”
Cuddy looked over at him, but House didn’t seem to notice. He was staring at a spot on the wall, lost in thought. “I was going to take the Vicodin. I was going to take it because…maybe I could just hallucinate again. Or…die.”
Before House knew it, Cuddy had planted herself on his lap and hugged him tightly, gripping him. House didn’t know what else to do but hug her back. They sat there, holding each other, for another couple of minutes before Cuddy suddenly pulled away.
“I need to get back now.” She sniffed and continued putting her stuff back in the medical bag. House knew that she had been crying but he was in no mood to point it out or talk about it. She walked out of the bathroom and headed to the front door before she realized that House wasn’t behind her. She walked back to the bathroom to see that he hadn’t moved from his spot on the toilet. He looked back up at her, pleadingly, desperately.
“Please stay.” He said it so simply, so honestly. Cuddy gazed at him, lovingly, for a few seconds before smiling a little bit. “But I have nothing to wear.”
House looked glanced over at the shattered mirror in the bathtub. “That has to get cleaned up I guess.”
“Tomorrow.” Cuddy walked over and helped him off the seat and into his bedroom. It was clear that his leg was really hurting him and she wanted to help him feel better. She wished with all her heart that she could kiss his wounds and they would all go away…but she couldn’t. So she resolved to make up for all of them…physical and mental.
He sat down on his bed and pointed to his dresser drawers. “There are plenty of shirts in there. Take your pick.”
Cuddy walked over to the dresser and opened it. She picked out a really long shirt with Led Zeppelin on the front. She pulled it out and held it up against her body: it came down to her knees. She looked back up at House. “Think it’ll fit?”
“It actually looks a bit small” he replied while hoisting his leg up onto the bed and lying down against the pillow. Cuddy smiled again. “I probably smell like crap.”
“Join the club.” House replied.
“Well I’m going to change and wash my face.” Cuddy walked out of the room and into the bathroom. She took off her suit slowly and put the long t-shirt on. She pulled the shirt up to her face and took a deep breath. It smelled like him. It smelled like…comfort. She washed her face and she felt layers coming off: dirt, grime, make-up, lies, denials, half-truths…and she felt fresh. Renewed. She took a deep breath and went to look in the mirror…but it wasn’t there.
She instead turned and left the room and walked back into House’s. He was asleep already. Cuddy walked over to the closet and got out a big blanket and put it over the bed, on top of him. She walked around to the other side and got in next to him. She turned and lay on her side, her hands under her head, her face watching his. Just…watching. She was asleep within minutes too.
MD
House was in the tunnel again. He was trapped. Hannah was at the end. But there was so much dust…he could hear her screaming. He tried to scream back. “I’m coming! I’m coming!” But the words weren’t leaving his mouth. She couldn’t hear him. The tunnel was shaking…it was going to collapse. But he had to reach her. He could feel someone’s hand on his shoulder, trying to pull him out. He resisted it, he tried. He had to get to Hannah. He yelled her name, screamed her name…
House awoke suddenly with a gasp. He was sweating and breathing heavily. He swallowed and tried to sit up a little bit. He looked over at the clock at his bedside. It read 4:00am. The light was still on. He sighed and turned sideways to see Cuddy asleep next to him. Her head was facing him and her hand was resting on his arm. House frowned and looked closer. Was she…crying?
Confused, House sat up straighter and noticed that she was indeed crying. Alarmed, he shook her gently. “Cuddy. Cuddy!” She jolted awake suddenly and sat up, bolt right, looking around frantically. Then she collapsed against the pillows and burst into tears.
House, even more alarmed now, didn’t know what to do. Should he comfort her? Let her cry? Hug her? Would she push him away? But luckily his trepidation was saved when she brought her face out from behind her hands. “Uck. What am I crying about? It was just a dream.” She sniffed and looked around for a tissue.
House sighed stuck his arm out. Cuddy laughed a little bit and instead picked up a bunch of the t-shirt she had on and blew into that. House cringed. “My Led Zeppelin…” He grimaced.
“It was just a nightmare,” she repeated to herself.
“I had a nightmare too,” House muttered.
“You did?” Cuddy looked up at him. “Was it about…Hannah?”
House shrugged and looked away. Cuddy drew her knees up to her chest. “I had a dream that we were back on the site of the crash. But this time…this time Rachel…she was…” Cuddy took a deep breath before continuing. “You were down there trying to get her out of the wreckage and I was just waiting outside and then I heard something collapse. I was trying to get inside…you were trapped…I was trying to get in…” Cuddy put her head down on her knees.
“I had a dream that Hannah was trapped and I was underneath the wreckage with her. Someone was trying to pull me away and I had to…had to…I couldn’t.” House shook his head. Cuddy looked up at him. He glanced over at her.
Suddenly, he held his arms out and she scooted into them. She curled up next to him, with her head on his shoulder. They held each other tightly.
“Why did you choose me?” House blurted out loud. The question had been bugging him…he was sure that the person in the dream pulling him from Hannah had been Cuddy and it got him thinking…
“Because…you’re not normal.”
“Well gee I could have answered THAT one,” House replied sarcastically.
Cuddy turned around to face him and put her hand on his face. “You’re interesting. You may not be practical or…stable…but you want me. With baggage and all. Besides, normal is overrated.”
House looked down at her, as if discerning whether or not she was telling the truth.
“I am telling you the truth,” she responded as if reading his mind. “I was with Lucas, the perfect guy, but all I could think about was missing you teasing and mocking me, having you come to me for advice, interrupting my dates…” Cuddy let out a little half sob/laugh and buried her face in his shirt.
House blinked, trying to take it in. “The 80’s party. It was all true,” he said quietly.
Cuddy picked her face up. “What?”
“The 80’s party. What I said. It was true,” House looked down at Cuddy. She stared at him for a couple seconds before leaning in and kissing him tenderly. He kissed her back and they were lost in each other’s scent, taste…
Cuddy pulled away and put her head back on House’s chest. “If I have another nightmare…wake me up ok?”
“Ok,” House responded softly. He began to stroke her hair gently and he could feel her drifting off to sleep.
“Goodnight Cuddy,” House whispered.
“Goodnight House,” she murmured.
He leaned over and switched off the light.
I hope that you liked it! Let me know what you think!
Luddy
