Sticking to one shots for now until my real fan fics can materialize into fixed ideas. Until then, enjoy all my one shots.
Consider this--post EF.
__________________________________________________
If the nights were this easy,
and the days were longer than said,
for once I'd be capable enough,
to release you from my head.
For every toss I plan to make,
it replies with constant turning,
and escaping by shutting my eyes,
the attempt just leaves me burning.
For every smile that grazed your face,
for every stare left broken,
for the laughter that you gave,
the dreading words unspoken.
The guilt stands beneath the surface,
a mere pigment in my skin,
yet it causes far more problems,
affecting me far within.
If the nights were just this easy,
and the days were longer than done,
for once I could finally say,
this time I actually won.
Gasp.
House had shot upright on the couch with a cold thread of sweat framing his face. His face in complete alarm, he looked around him in terror.
Darkness practically consuming him, he unfixed his eyes from the trance and fell back yet again onto his pillow. Out the window, the moon gleamed with glory, but for some reason continued to disappear behind the clouds. As if hiding in shame. The nights' air was too sweet, and too cold. The third day of October; Why wouldn't it be?
Wiping down his face, and running his hands through his hair, he didn't dare go back to sleep. This reoccurring scenario had already happened one too many times tonight. Moreover, the entire week. So he sat up, carrying over his leg onto the cold floor, and glanced at the wall clock. He sighed in aggravation seeing how late--four a.m. to be exact--it already was. Seeing no point to actually go back to sleep, he forced himself into the kitchen and made coffee for himself. Wilson could make his own when he would wake. And besides, he needed all the coffee he could get for the long day ahead.
---
"Chase--get a tox screen. She's obviously an idiot if she thinks she just can't get drunk and then do drugs. Cameron, get an MRI. Still can't rule out cancer till we do. Foreman, search the home. There's probably more than unprotected sex that she's hiding from us." A familiar command that seemed to echo throughout the outer-office gave an eerie feeling to House. Watching them walk out, he himself walked into his office and taken by surprise, immediately met ends with Cuddy.
"Whoa. Why hello there--what happened with your face. You living up to your nickname now, partypants?" he said as he walked to his desk. She sighed in annoyance before answering.
"You have a lot of them, let's just say all of them."
"Okay,"
"You know the deal."
"yes I do. No patients, no procedures. It looks like Lucifer has given me my powers, but with benefits. Nothing's changed since last week either. Throwing that aside. What was your problem last night."
"I'm tired."
"Clearly."
"I don't know what else there is to discuss beyond that."
"Right." He got up again as she began to walk out and walked right up to her, his head practically about to arch over.
"Hey." he whispered. She turned around, and found herself inches from his face.
"happy birthday." he finished. Scoffing, before smiling greatly, she looked down at the floor, and up again.
"Who told you."
"What, you don't think I'd remember--"
"No." she stated firmly.
"You don't seem to appreciate the gesture."
"Like I said. I'm tired. Let's try this again in a few hours." shocked at her retort, he focused his eyes at her as she walked out.
"Oh-kay."
Walking back to her office, all she could do was swear under her breath with one tear to streaming down her face. With no surprise to her--this unhappiness was always common on her own day.
"She hates Douglas." House proclaimed as he busted open Wilson's door.
"What ever happened to hello's--the greatest salutation ever created."
"Also the most mundane, therefore I opened with this one." he plopped a seat onto Wilson's couch. Basically starting how all their great conversations started.
"Elaborate."
"Hello was used--"
"No, the relevant one."
"Right. I said happy birthday to her."
"Rel-e-vant. Yes I think I said that right."
"She's pissed now."
"Angry at you, ah yes. Of course. She is pissed at you for something, you being the pain in her ass which means she despises Douglas, her boyfriend. I see where you're going with this."
"He's done something."
"No, you are searching for fault in him, non-existing faults because she caught up with you."
"He's not perfect."
"I'm not saying that he is."
"He's done something."
"No, you have. You're torturing her with all of this. She's torn between you two, and you're both pulling her to shreds."
"So you're saying I should give up. Stop fighting."
"I'm saying, stop fighting her. Stop fighting her, by pushing her to choose you. You're trying to capture air House. Yes, it's there. You can't see it, you can't feel it. I'm not surprised that the uncertainty is pushing your limits. But you have to gently carry it in. It's too quick, and too fragile to just steal away." House sighed, and stood up, walked in front of Wilson and opened the door.
"Well then tell me, what do you do, when you're running out of air?" Wilson didn't answer.
"I can't let him suffocate me. Because--I need to breathe." he gently closed the door, leaving Wilson in dismay.
---
House had no where to go. He was free from clinic, no dealing with patients period--no procedures to carry out. All he could do was toss his ball against the wall as he laid back in his chair. As he bounced it back and forth with the handle of his cane, his force intensified. Eventually driving it off course to ricochet against the glass doors and back onto his desk. He had enough, he couldn't hold back any longer.
In a swift movement, he had strode to his doors and flung them open, and he began to go down the hallways in perfect strides. He reached the elevator in a matter of seconds.
Reaching the lobby floor, he dodged and ducked people that came his way. He finally made it to the clinic and swept by the nurses. But as soon as his eyes reached her office, he came to a shifted stop. link
Her lips were tied with Douglas, who had a colorful bouquet in one hand, while Cuddy held a charm bracelet. Switching his eyes from left to right, he stood stationary. When he just pulled her into an embrace, she immediately caught his eyes. Her facial expression changed. He slightly shook his head at her, as if motioning to stay. And then he gave a curt nod, before looking both ways, and dashing out of there as fast as his leg could allow.
Part of leaving Mayfield had an impact on House. He decided to stir up his own lessons. Maybe not consciously, but lessons that benefited him in a way where they could pay him back later. This particular lesson he had accomplished without waver, and without hesitation. The lesson, of silence. Learning to silence.
Consider this--post EF.
__________________________________________________
If the nights were this easy,
and the days were longer than said,
for once I'd be capable enough,
to release you from my head.
For every toss I plan to make,
it replies with constant turning,
and escaping by shutting my eyes,
the attempt just leaves me burning.
For every smile that grazed your face,
for every stare left broken,
for the laughter that you gave,
the dreading words unspoken.
The guilt stands beneath the surface,
a mere pigment in my skin,
yet it causes far more problems,
affecting me far within.
If the nights were just this easy,
and the days were longer than done,
for once I could finally say,
this time I actually won.
Gasp.
House had shot upright on the couch with a cold thread of sweat framing his face. His face in complete alarm, he looked around him in terror.
Darkness practically consuming him, he unfixed his eyes from the trance and fell back yet again onto his pillow. Out the window, the moon gleamed with glory, but for some reason continued to disappear behind the clouds. As if hiding in shame. The nights' air was too sweet, and too cold. The third day of October; Why wouldn't it be?
Wiping down his face, and running his hands through his hair, he didn't dare go back to sleep. This reoccurring scenario had already happened one too many times tonight. Moreover, the entire week. So he sat up, carrying over his leg onto the cold floor, and glanced at the wall clock. He sighed in aggravation seeing how late--four a.m. to be exact--it already was. Seeing no point to actually go back to sleep, he forced himself into the kitchen and made coffee for himself. Wilson could make his own when he would wake. And besides, he needed all the coffee he could get for the long day ahead.
---
"Chase--get a tox screen. She's obviously an idiot if she thinks she just can't get drunk and then do drugs. Cameron, get an MRI. Still can't rule out cancer till we do. Foreman, search the home. There's probably more than unprotected sex that she's hiding from us." A familiar command that seemed to echo throughout the outer-office gave an eerie feeling to House. Watching them walk out, he himself walked into his office and taken by surprise, immediately met ends with Cuddy.
"Whoa. Why hello there--what happened with your face. You living up to your nickname now, partypants?" he said as he walked to his desk. She sighed in annoyance before answering.
"You have a lot of them, let's just say all of them."
"Okay,"
"You know the deal."
"yes I do. No patients, no procedures. It looks like Lucifer has given me my powers, but with benefits. Nothing's changed since last week either. Throwing that aside. What was your problem last night."
"I'm tired."
"Clearly."
"I don't know what else there is to discuss beyond that."
"Right." He got up again as she began to walk out and walked right up to her, his head practically about to arch over.
"Hey." he whispered. She turned around, and found herself inches from his face.
"happy birthday." he finished. Scoffing, before smiling greatly, she looked down at the floor, and up again.
"Who told you."
"What, you don't think I'd remember--"
"No." she stated firmly.
"You don't seem to appreciate the gesture."
"Like I said. I'm tired. Let's try this again in a few hours." shocked at her retort, he focused his eyes at her as she walked out.
"Oh-kay."
Walking back to her office, all she could do was swear under her breath with one tear to streaming down her face. With no surprise to her--this unhappiness was always common on her own day.
"She hates Douglas." House proclaimed as he busted open Wilson's door.
"What ever happened to hello's--the greatest salutation ever created."
"Also the most mundane, therefore I opened with this one." he plopped a seat onto Wilson's couch. Basically starting how all their great conversations started.
"Elaborate."
"Hello was used--"
"No, the relevant one."
"Right. I said happy birthday to her."
"Rel-e-vant. Yes I think I said that right."
"She's pissed now."
"Angry at you, ah yes. Of course. She is pissed at you for something, you being the pain in her ass which means she despises Douglas, her boyfriend. I see where you're going with this."
"He's done something."
"No, you are searching for fault in him, non-existing faults because she caught up with you."
"He's not perfect."
"I'm not saying that he is."
"He's done something."
"No, you have. You're torturing her with all of this. She's torn between you two, and you're both pulling her to shreds."
"So you're saying I should give up. Stop fighting."
"I'm saying, stop fighting her. Stop fighting her, by pushing her to choose you. You're trying to capture air House. Yes, it's there. You can't see it, you can't feel it. I'm not surprised that the uncertainty is pushing your limits. But you have to gently carry it in. It's too quick, and too fragile to just steal away." House sighed, and stood up, walked in front of Wilson and opened the door.
"Well then tell me, what do you do, when you're running out of air?" Wilson didn't answer.
"I can't let him suffocate me. Because--I need to breathe." he gently closed the door, leaving Wilson in dismay.
---
House had no where to go. He was free from clinic, no dealing with patients period--no procedures to carry out. All he could do was toss his ball against the wall as he laid back in his chair. As he bounced it back and forth with the handle of his cane, his force intensified. Eventually driving it off course to ricochet against the glass doors and back onto his desk. He had enough, he couldn't hold back any longer.
In a swift movement, he had strode to his doors and flung them open, and he began to go down the hallways in perfect strides. He reached the elevator in a matter of seconds.
Reaching the lobby floor, he dodged and ducked people that came his way. He finally made it to the clinic and swept by the nurses. But as soon as his eyes reached her office, he came to a shifted stop. link
Her lips were tied with Douglas, who had a colorful bouquet in one hand, while Cuddy held a charm bracelet. Switching his eyes from left to right, he stood stationary. When he just pulled her into an embrace, she immediately caught his eyes. Her facial expression changed. He slightly shook his head at her, as if motioning to stay. And then he gave a curt nod, before looking both ways, and dashing out of there as fast as his leg could allow.
Part of leaving Mayfield had an impact on House. He decided to stir up his own lessons. Maybe not consciously, but lessons that benefited him in a way where they could pay him back later. This particular lesson he had accomplished without waver, and without hesitation. The lesson, of silence. Learning to silence.
Lisa Cuddy
Princeton Plainsboro
Teaching Hospital
506 Maple street
office #326
Cuddy-
Wilson has been writing to me. I know whats happening to you.
Your doing a really bad job of covering this up.
Im serious. People are going to start asking questions. People besides wilson.
Speaking of wilson, dont let this slip to him. He'll let it slip to.....well, everyone.
But i want to "keep" this secret. So dont change anything.
Take care of yourself, Cuddy.
-House
Princeton Plainsboro
Teaching Hospital
506 Maple street
office #326
Cuddy-
Wilson has been writing to me. I know whats happening to you.
Your doing a really bad job of covering this up.
Im serious. People are going to start asking questions. People besides wilson.
Speaking of wilson, dont let this slip to him. He'll let it slip to.....well, everyone.
But i want to "keep" this secret. So dont change anything.
Take care of yourself, Cuddy.
-House
A poem I wrote without any intention to make a House related piece of work of it.
But I was told it fits House, so... form an opinion. :D
Tiny little fractures
If I don't love...
do I have to hate?
Then why do not all
feelings just fade?
Pain, sorrow, anger, happiness
all of that ceases to be
You can only comprehend
If you understand me
Eventually...nothing remains
only emptiness
it could be much easier
to be born emotionless
Am I embittered?
Afraid to be hurt?
I don't even know
I can give you my word.
Did I just forget
how to feel?
Then how can I tell
illusion from what is real?
The answer is simple
I can't.
Though I needed a lot of time
to realize what it really meant.
There's just one thing
of which I am sure
I am master of feeling
insecure.
But I was told it fits House, so... form an opinion. :D
Tiny little fractures
If I don't love...
do I have to hate?
Then why do not all
feelings just fade?
Pain, sorrow, anger, happiness
all of that ceases to be
You can only comprehend
If you understand me
Eventually...nothing remains
only emptiness
it could be much easier
to be born emotionless
Am I embittered?
Afraid to be hurt?
I don't even know
I can give you my word.
Did I just forget
how to feel?
Then how can I tell
illusion from what is real?
The answer is simple
I can't.
Though I needed a lot of time
to realize what it really meant.
There's just one thing
of which I am sure
I am master of feeling
insecure.