A Million Love Songs Later

A/N: Right so sorry this chapter is really later than usual. The heat here has been unbearable! I can't do anything it's awful! And everytime I go to the beach I get burnt so I'm not happy and it really hurts. Anyway this story is almost over, which is kinda sad since I do love writing it but I have my other one so... There is only six more chapters and an epilogue then it's over. Anyway I hope you like this chapter, let me know what you thought I really appreciate it. Thank you so much xoxo

Chapter 18: Head or Heart


        It was that dreaded day for Blair and Nate. Chuck had invited them to the party, Blair was not looking forward to it at all she would have to pretend all was good she could just see Chuck's smirk at that moment, shaking Nate's hand welcoming them while all the time knowing that Blair was lying to him and Chuck was enjoying every single second of it. The thought of Chuck and Nate talking made her cringe, Chuck would be laughing at Nate and that wasn't fair. The guilt was taking her over, but pretty soon it would all be over, she wouldn't have to live with the guilt anymore.
        Nate had finished gotten dressed Blair fixed his tie before Nate went outside to call their car. Blair placed her diamond headband in her hair which was plated into a side bun that gave her the effortless look she was looking for. She grabbed her navy Dior trench off the hook and ran out the door.
The traffic was awful, it was rush hour people must have been coming home from work. Blair suggested they turn back and go home, that they were never going to arrive on time so there was no point but Nate resisted and maintained that they continue on their way. Blair looked annoyed and she looked so pale when the car pulled up outside the Plaza Hotel.
They walked hand in hand to the front entrance and to be welcomed by two security guards built up in black suits.
“Hi”
Nate greeted the first security guard on the left side entrance.
“Good evening, can I help you?”
He responded clutching onto his list of names.
“Yes we're guests this evening”
“Are you on the list?”
He held it up and pointed to it.
“Yes, Nathaniel Archibald and Blair Waldorf?”
Nate smiled as the other guard gave him daggers for no apparent reason.
“Ah yes. Well enjoy your evening sir, madam”
He placed his hand out pointing out the entrance hall.
“Thank you”
        Blair and Nate walked into the ballroom hand in hand and got straight into socializing after having a glass of champagne first of course. Chuck was at the opposite side of the room to Blair but out of all the people there she was the one that caught his eye. He was supposedly in conversation with one of New York's richest men but all that seemed unimportant once Blair was in the room. Gabby was at his side, being the perfect girlfriend. She noticed that he wasn't paying any attention to the billionaire, that his mind was elsewhere.
“Sweetie are you okay?”
“Yeah fine”
His eyes didn't move a muscle. He kept looking over at her talking and laughing not realizing that Chuck was looking over.
“Do you know her?”
Gabby saw who he was looking at and twigged something was up with her boyfriend.
“I...I used too. Not anymore”
He thought for a second of the Blair that he used to know and how much he loved her not this new Blair she was showing the world.
“She's beautiful”
“Yeah, she is”
He smiled then got back into the zone and got chatting again forgetting Blair. That was not going to last long.
        After hours of not bumping into each other they finally met outside in the gardens. Many people were outside smoking or talking. Blair was sitting on the bench next to the pond, Chuck saw that she had left the ballroom and followed her outside and sat beside her.
“Well you look lovely”
“Thank you. You look handsome too”
The second she said that it occurred to her, that could be sending out the wrong signals, he might get the wrong idea. But that's who she was with Chuck she couldn't control what came out of her mouth.
“Having a good time?”
Chuck asked.
“Yeah, having a great time. Didn't think I would”
She stated her honesty.
“Why not? My parties aren't that bad are they?”
He chuckled.
“Of course not. Anyway you seem happy”
“Being with you the last few weeks have be great. Really great actually”
He admitted the reason for his happiness and it was all down to Blair.
“Yeah... Gabby seems nice”
Blair sighed as Gabby stood in the window of the hall and saw that Chuck was outside sitting with the most beautiful woman in the room that night. Gabby's face was full of rage, what was he doing?
“Yeah she is, really nice”
Blair tried to disguise the look of envy on her face, but there was no hiding from Chuck. “Are you jealous?”
She jumped onto her feet.
“No! No! I just think you can do so much better”
“Oh my God you are!”
Chuck laughed hysterically.
“No I'm not. I'm just trying to protect you, she seems like a gold digger to me”
Blair made up stupid excuses the truth is that she was jealous.
“You told me to move on, I am. What is it Blair? You don't want me and you don't want anyone else to be with me either”
Chuck stood up and yelled back at her.
“No! And anyway it was you who kissed me”
“Only because you had been giving out signals all day”
“What?”
Blair voice got very high in surprise.
“Victrola? You got on the stage”
“I was reminiscing”
She tried to explain.
“Obviously and you loved it. You may as well have said 'Take. Me. Now'”
He chose those words very carefully, he remembered them all too well.
“I don't appreciate that tone and I didn't say that so...”
Blair got very annoyed with him and stomped her foot on the ground like a spoilt brat.
“You may as well have”
“Oh you know what... I'm going back in”
“Fine!”
Chuck yelled as Blair sighed and muttered some curses under her breath before returning into the building. The second that Blair got back in the waiter carried the tray with the last glass of champagne on it for Blair to grab. She picked it off the tray and sat down at one of the tables. Gabby was there also looking around for Blair, she wanted some answers. She finally spotted her and made her way over to Blair and took up a seat next to her.
“Hi”
Gabby warmly greeted.
“Hi”
Blair said, knowing who it was.
“Chuck lovely isn't he?”
“Yeah if you like annoying, ignorant, arrogant assholes then yeah wonderful”
Blair spat out getting out all of her hatred for that mother Chucker.
“Oh I'm sorry I'm Gabby”
“Yeah I know”
Blair rolled her eyes.
“You know?”
“Yes Mr Wonderful told me”
Blair answered with her voice full of sarcasm.
“He hasn't told me about you, you are?”
Blair really didn't want to get into a nice, lovely, cosy chat with Chuck's girlfriend.
“Blair Waldorf”
“Oh yes you're engaged to Nate Archibald”
“You know Nate?”
“I've seen his work. He's pretty good”
“Yeah he is”
Blair smiled knowing how lucky she was to have a guy like Nate.
“So how do you know Chuck?”
“I've known him all my life”
Blair got more involved in this conversation when the subject of their history came up.
“That's cute. So you know all of his secrets?”
Gabby giggled.
“I don't know what he's been up to recently but I know him pretty well and anyway...”
Gabby then grabbed onto Blair's arm and moved closer to make sure she heard what she had to say.
“Stay away from him”
“Excuse me?”
Blair looked confused and scared at the same time.
“I saw the look you two were giving eachother. I saw you out in the garden”
“What look?”
Blair tried to play dumb sipping what was left at the bottom of her champagne glass.
“Lets just say I'm not dumb. You two had or have something”
Gabby grabbed onto Blair's wrist even tighter, but in a discrete way so no one would notice.
“No we don't, we did once. That's over”
“Why don't I believe you?”
“Believe what you want. There is nothing between us”
Blair remembered all those years ago when she used to lie so convincingly, the actress in her raised back to the surface.
“Just stay away him. Whatever your past. He's taken now”
“So am I”
Blair grinned and pointed to Nate who was laughing and chatting on the other side of the room.
“And I'm guessing you don't want me to tell Nate about my suspicions”
“That's all they are suspicions. No truth”
Blair pulled away from her and got up to walk away.
“Just back off. He's happy now, that's because of me. Don't ruin it will you”
Gabby smirked as Blair clenched onto her wrist. So now she was going to do the opposite of what Gabby had said but it would work to her advantage. Blair realized that Gabby was right. She had to back off Chuck and be happy with what she had, she did not want an affair.
She walked back outside and joined Chuck who had moved and was standing over the bridge tossing pebbles into the water.
“I was wrong about Gabby. She really is...Lovely”
She paused before delivering the last word.
“I know”
He nodded.
“You've been a lot happier recently that's down to her right?”
Chuck shook his head slowly before Blair turned away and began to walk back into the building.
“No!”
He pulled her hand back towards him.
“What?”
“No. It's not down to her. It's down to you”
“But you said she was great”
Blair looked confused, she thought that Chuck really did like Gabby, or was she just another pawn in their love game.
“Yeah Gabby's great but she's not you”
“Chuck...”
He could tell another excuse was coming up but he was done with them.
“No. I'm done waiting. I want you now”
“No”
Blair mumbled under her breath actually hoping that he hadn't heard.
“Did I tell you that you look beautiful tonight?”
“Yes you have”
She blushed and gazed smiling down at the floor.
“Please Blair just listen to your heart for once”
That second she paused and turned and walked back inside, leaving Chuck standing in the outside terrace alone.
        The next day Nate had gone to work and Blair felt like telling someone all of her sins. The walk to the church was too much today and it was raining. Serena was still in California. She turned to her best friend for help... And judgement.
“Hey”
Dan said answering the door holding about five cuddly toys, a rattle and a Winnie the Pooh mobile.
“Hi, can I talk to you?”
Blair asked clicking her fingers, behaving very nervous.
“Yeah come in.” Dan said trying to balance all the toys in one hand. Blair gave him a hand as she walked into the apartment. “Sorry about the mess, Katie's been shopping...Oh Joy you know. I swear she thinks we're having ten sets of twins the amount of toys she's bought and then she got...”
Dan mumbled on but Blair sighed and tried to get the words out and then finally did.
“I kissed Chuck”
“What?”
Dan dropped all the toys in second.
“Well he kissed me but I didn't do anything to stop it”
“What?”
“I can't believe I did that!”
“What?”
His voice got even louder each time he said it.
“Stop saying that!”
“You and Chuck? Blair that's not good”
He tried to pick up the toys and shook his head in disapproval of Blair's disloyalty to Nate.
“I don't need you telling me that! I came for your help not judgement”
“Okay sorry, only help no judgement. What does your heart say?”
He stopped worrying about the toys and sat next to her on the couch.
“I don't...”
“Listen to your heart for once Blair”
Dan repeated the words that Chuck had said the previous night.
“That's what Chuck said. My head loves Nate, so much but...”
Blair sighed and didn't finish her sentence, Dan finished it for her.
“Your heart is in love with the Bass isn't it?”
Her eyes filled up with tears, Dan was her best friend she didn't need words he knew exactly how she felt. He couldn't say he approved but he had always known Blair had always been Chuck's.

TO BE CONTINUED...

A/N: Ahh I'm really happy with this chapter I know people are getting restless now but I've heard 'Get them together' so many times now I'm just ignoring it! I've had this planned months ago and I'm not changing it so sorry but it has to be dragged out a bit longer. Anyway I hope you enjoy this chapter. Please comment. Thank you xoxo