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posted by TweenaCat
You must put on a dramatic, profound voice to read this bit * :

For years we have endured narrow-minded prejudice and thoughtless stereotyping. We have been belittled and taunted. We have been made to feel worthless and boring.
And we are not only talking here about stupid high school bullies, but about people in general, judging us on what they hear in the media. Ooh, the media have been prejudiced against us since the dawn of time (shut up, it's called a hyperbole okay?).
We are all portrayed as carbon copies of one another, strange, stupid, unsociable freaks. This my friends, is geekism. Prejudice against geeks.

And it really is quite unjustified! If anything, it should be cool to be a geek. Geeks are great!! Geeks are clever, happy people with a great interest in life. And they're going to enjoy their jobs more, ultimately, aren't they? It is possible to be cool and fun and a geek but it is also difficult. But I repeat: it is possible.

Therfore I have put a list together as a survival guide to modern geeks for avoiding isolation or arguments. It's not everything of course. Have you seen how long this article is already??? Some of it is learned from experience. Some of it is common sense but is quite hard to remember sometimes.

1. When the Loud Bimbo With The Lipgloss next to you who has just spent five minutes making fun of the fact that you like reading, (apparently thinking it's okay to do so because she has decided she is "your friend") asks whether happiness is spelled with a "y" or an "i" DO NOT comment cynically that she should try reading a book or a newspaper and then they might pick up spelling words that everyone else learned when they were five. DO NOT laugh or snort or give her The Look. Just smile sweetly and say, "A y".

2. The Look is something that all geeks should learn. It is a way of looking at someone that says "You are completely stupid and as thick as mince. I am far superior to you. I pity you. You will never know what I know" However, it should ONLY be used in dire situations. NOT when you say a sentence with the word "moderation" or "sceptical" in it and your friend yells, " I told you to stop using long words!!" It might be really, really annoying but it does not call for The Look. It also does not call for a curt, "I'll talk how I want thanks so much" because they'll laugh at you.

3. Actually, in general, do not use the look unless you are using it on someone you will not see again i.e. someone who cannot get their own back on you by yelling swear words at you (the only insults they know, poor things.) And practise a lot before using because it is easily confused with the " I'm an eccentric who likes to talk to the voices inside her head and thinks she is a reincarnation of a tree" look. Wide pitying eyes, raised eyebrows and shaking your head usually works

4. Correcting people's punctuation when they've done it wrong deliberately is usually a no-no. Even if it is really annoying. Especially if they are meant to be an authority figure. When the "teacher" at that art camp keeps saying, "You done that quite good just now" don't put up your hand and say, "um, your grammar's all wrong..."

5. Don't contradict yourself. It's okay to have strong opinions but it's a sure way to lose friends if you go on at them all year about how the internet is corrupting the world and people can do nothing without it these days and then, say, join a fansite and make yourself a profile. Which is why I still don't have a photo and don't use my full name.

6. The absolute golden rule: KNOW WHEN TO STOP. As I've said, do not use The Look on friends, do not correct people when they don't want to be corrected. Just shut your eyes to the misplaced apostrophe and keep schtum. And also, you know that little irritating cliche of "be yourself"? It's true, but being yourself doesn't mean you can't be someone else as well. Enjoy your books/chess/sci-fi but go to parties as well. Otherwise you are just confirming the stereotype. And if you just sit in the corner with your friends and dance with the guy with the glasses, so much the better. At least you are showing people you can have fun like them, in your own way.

Good Luck.



*Wow, a footnote already and only one sentence in! I just wanted to remind you that sometimes people who talk in a dramatic profound voice are using that voice to disguise the fact that what they're saying is utter codswallop. This is not one of those times okay??? (Well, actually...)
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