CANADA RAP
(i did not write this)
Eh…h-hello there guys, my name is Matthew…
I…hey come on guys! It’s like I’m talking AT you
I’ve been neutral all these years, keeping my poise
BUT I THINK IT’S TIME I STARTED MAKING SOME NOISE
THE OTHER COUNTRIES CALL ME CANADA YO
AND MY BROTHER IS THAT IDIOT DOWN BELOW
SOMETIMES THEY CALL ME HIS HAT,
IF YOU ASK ME, I THINK HE’S FAT
THAT LAZY ASS PUNK BASTARD CAN’T KEEP PEACE TO SAVE HIS LIFE
SOMETIMES THEY CALL ME HIS WIFE,
THEM HATERS BE BEGGIN TO STRIFE
THIS MOTHER FUCKING AWESOME NATION DON’T WANNA BE STIRRING NO TROUBLE
IF YOU ASK FOR MY HELP I’LL CALL MY MOUNTIES ON THE DOUBLE
WHO’S THE BEST AT HOCKEY? WHO CAN LOOK GOOD IN PLAID?
MUTHA FUCKERS, WHY YOU MOPING? YOU HATERS SHOULD BE GLAD
THAT I RAISED MY VOICE TO BLESS YOU WITH THE JOYS OF MY RAP
SOMETIMES I BLEND INTO THE WALL
BUT I DON’T REALLY CARE AT ALL
SOMEDAY ALL THEM HATERS, THEY WILL RESPECT MY AUTHORITY
THEY WILL AGREE TO MAKE MY WILL A PRIORITY
SOMEDAY THEY’LL LISTEN TO ME
I’LL FUCKING POWN THEM, THEY’LL SEE
THAT DEMENTED SOVIET CREEP WILL THINK TO LOOK WHERE HE SITS
HE BETTER KNOW THAT I CAN SOMEDAY TEAR HIS ASS TO BITS
I’M A PART OF THE GREAT EIGHT
THEM HATERS BETTER APPRECHIATE
ALL THE GOOD MY MAPLE EMBLEM REPRESENTS IN THIS WORLD
MEET KUMAKICHI, HE’S CUTE!
WE BE SO CLOSE HATERS CAN’T EVEN COMPUTE
HE’S MY RIGHT H-
oh…you say your name is Kumajiro?
Well, how the hell should I…
I’M CAAANNNAAADDDAAAAA!!!
UGH….
ONE LAST THING BEFORE I GO
TIME TO TELL THAT MR. EYEBROWS ONE THING HE SHOULD KNOW
I AM NOT MY BROTHER, FUCKER
I AM NOT THAT IDIOT SUCKER
SURE, I LOOK LIKE HIM WITH A CURL
AND I MAY CATCH BALLS LIKE A GIRL
BUT REMEMBER MY NAME
YOU FUCKIN LIMEY, ALL THE SAME
MY NAME IS CANADA BITCHES, REMEMBER THAT WELL
OR FACE THE WRATH OF MY HOCKEY TEAM IN HELL
PEACE EH!
(i did not write this)
Eh…h-hello there guys, my name is Matthew…
I…hey come on guys! It’s like I’m talking AT you
I’ve been neutral all these years, keeping my poise
BUT I THINK IT’S TIME I STARTED MAKING SOME NOISE
THE OTHER COUNTRIES CALL ME CANADA YO
AND MY BROTHER IS THAT IDIOT DOWN BELOW
SOMETIMES THEY CALL ME HIS HAT,
IF YOU ASK ME, I THINK HE’S FAT
THAT LAZY ASS PUNK BASTARD CAN’T KEEP PEACE TO SAVE HIS LIFE
SOMETIMES THEY CALL ME HIS WIFE,
THEM HATERS BE BEGGIN TO STRIFE
THIS MOTHER FUCKING AWESOME NATION DON’T WANNA BE STIRRING NO TROUBLE
IF YOU ASK FOR MY HELP I’LL CALL MY MOUNTIES ON THE DOUBLE
WHO’S THE BEST AT HOCKEY? WHO CAN LOOK GOOD IN PLAID?
MUTHA FUCKERS, WHY YOU MOPING? YOU HATERS SHOULD BE GLAD
THAT I RAISED MY VOICE TO BLESS YOU WITH THE JOYS OF MY RAP
SOMETIMES I BLEND INTO THE WALL
BUT I DON’T REALLY CARE AT ALL
SOMEDAY ALL THEM HATERS, THEY WILL RESPECT MY AUTHORITY
THEY WILL AGREE TO MAKE MY WILL A PRIORITY
SOMEDAY THEY’LL LISTEN TO ME
I’LL FUCKING POWN THEM, THEY’LL SEE
THAT DEMENTED SOVIET CREEP WILL THINK TO LOOK WHERE HE SITS
HE BETTER KNOW THAT I CAN SOMEDAY TEAR HIS ASS TO BITS
I’M A PART OF THE GREAT EIGHT
THEM HATERS BETTER APPRECHIATE
ALL THE GOOD MY MAPLE EMBLEM REPRESENTS IN THIS WORLD
MEET KUMAKICHI, HE’S CUTE!
WE BE SO CLOSE HATERS CAN’T EVEN COMPUTE
HE’S MY RIGHT H-
oh…you say your name is Kumajiro?
Well, how the hell should I…
I’M CAAANNNAAADDDAAAAA!!!
UGH….
ONE LAST THING BEFORE I GO
TIME TO TELL THAT MR. EYEBROWS ONE THING HE SHOULD KNOW
I AM NOT MY BROTHER, FUCKER
I AM NOT THAT IDIOT SUCKER
SURE, I LOOK LIKE HIM WITH A CURL
AND I MAY CATCH BALLS LIKE A GIRL
BUT REMEMBER MY NAME
YOU FUCKIN LIMEY, ALL THE SAME
MY NAME IS CANADA BITCHES, REMEMBER THAT WELL
OR FACE THE WRATH OF MY HOCKEY TEAM IN HELL
PEACE EH!