Four
Sacrificial Blood cont'd
In was after three in the afternoon when Adam and Sam pulled into New Hope, Minnesota, population 21,233. From most of the signs that led into town, it became obvious that it was a suburb of Minneapolis and had quite a few amenities nearby. But they bypassed all those things, pulling through the main part of town to the northern fringes of the neighborhood where the streets turned from asphalt back to concrete on the road of Highway 169 that took them north until the compass turned back to the east.
The last time Adam had been in Minnesota, his mother had been killed. He'd been attacked and eaten alive, which sounds disgusting no matter how you put it. And Heaven hadn't lasted long enough. It all felt unreal now — like it had been the most horrible, vivid, intense dream he'd ever had in his life, but this was his reality. His brothers were his reality. His mother was gone, and no amount of wishing or pleading was gonna bring her back. Adam had learned a long time ago to live in the here and the now. Dean and Sam had taught him that.
But there was something about this that made Adam feel like all of that had been a build up to something else. The Angels had used him to force Dean's hand, and Michael had used him to try ending the world all because of some stupid order. It had been a miracle for him to get out in the first place. But when Dean and Sam had reopened the cage to pull him out, he'd released Michael. They still weren't sure if Lucifer was still down there. Based on the general normalness of the world, they were all hoping he was. But now Adam wasn't so sure.
He couldn't completely explain it to Sam, but Adam knew he had to help now. He'd never offered before now, and neither had they. But since Cas had shown up at the house with Mary, all Adam could do was think he had to save her, and it didn't matter why he thought or felt that way anymore.
Sam got off the highway, getting on a side road as the compass needle skewed with the shake of the car. They drove through a tightly-packed neighborhood, garnering quite a few stares from parents getting home with their children, but Sam never slowed down, even when the needle directed them onto a path around the lake behind the neighborhood. At a "Y" in the road that went north or east, the needle drifted east, and Sam followed it diligently until the compass went east near another lake less than a mile from the previous, when the road went north.
Sam got out of the car, looking around for a few minutes, leaning into the car as Adam waited.
"Looks like we're walkin' from here," he said. "We should got what we can out of the trunk, and I'll lock it up."
Though Adam didn't feel right about leaving the car, he followed Sam's lead, meeting his older brother at the trunk as the elder scrounged for everything they would need. When Sam handed Adam the Colt, he took it uneasily, knowing its history and instantly feeling intimidated.
"Only shoot this when you've got a shot," Sam told him. "The Demons will more than likely be expecting us, and I can't worry about you along with Dean and Mary and those kids. Keep your eyes and ears open, and yell the instant you see or hear something wrong. Got it?"
Adam nodded silently, watching Sam strap on the duffle Dean usually carried before he closed to trunk and led the way in the brush around the car.
Even with the sun shining, it was still cold. Adam was guessing it was in the mid-thirties, and he could only hold his jacket around his chest so tight while still holding the compass. He kept his eyes on everything, from the soggy ground that indicated that it had rained or snowed recently to the bare, brown trees that loomed over their heads ominously. Adam remembered these things from his childhood, a blistering reminder that he was no longer a child and had the kind of life he would never wish on anyone. Even though he'd only been living like this a short time, he was already having trouble remembering what his old life had been like. And he hated being useless. Dean always told him he got that from their Dad. Adam didn't really care where he got it from. He just knew he didn't like feeling like he couldn't do anything.
"Sam," he said suddenly, "do you know what it feels like to have to do something? Like if you don't do it, something bad will happen."
Sam sighed, keeping his eyes on everything the same way Adam was. "Yeah, I do. In spades."
Adam looked at his older brother. "So what happened?"
Sam looked at him. "We're living it right now," he said seriously. But then he sighed and looked away. "The first time I . . . died, Dean couldn't let me stay that way. And we both had to live with the consequences for a long time, even after he went to hell and came back. Killing Lilith the first time was the worst mistake I ever made, and how here we are, trying to keep her from coming back."
"Do you think she'll try to bring Lucifer back?" Adam asked softly.
"Honestly, I don't know," Sam revealed. "All she may care about is getting revenge on me and Dean. She may want to make us pay for killing her — even if she knew she was going to die in the first place. All I know is that I can't let her use Mary to come back. Not like that. Mary deserves the chance at a normal childhood. Like the one you had. You both deserve a normal life. And I'm just sorry we can't give that to you right now."
Adam couldn't say it was okay, because it wasn't. But he knew how Sam was feeling. He knew Sam didn't want any of this, but he'd apologized for it so much that Adam was just tired of hearing it. He knew Sam was sorry. It didn't change anything.
Sunset was just after five-thirty, and Adam and Sam followed around following the compass needle the entire time as it directed them though leafless trees and muddy grass. They pulled out flashlights just as it began to get dark and cloudy, and when the "path" they were on forked, Sam decided to split up. Adam, again, didn't like that idea, but he didn't argue, gripping his flashlight in one hand and the Colt in the other.
"Call me if you see anything, and even if you don't call me in twenty minutes. Okay?" Sam pressed.
Adam nodded. "Okay," he agreed, watching Sam go left while he went right on the path that still went east along with the compass needle.
In the dimming light of day, it got colder a lot faster without much cloud cover, and Adam was immediately regretting now bringing a coat. But he pressed on, shining his light everywhere he could and listening as hard as he could to anything that was out of the ordinary. As far as wilderness and dank darkness, Minnesota was actually pretty ordinary, even after everything that had happened. But with the circumstances being what they were, nothing was ordinary about walking along a "path" with a flashlight and a gun in his hand in case something inhuman decided to pop out and surprise him like it was his birthday or something.
The wind picked up before Adam had a chance to call Sam, looking down at the compass to see it spinning so fast it was almost impossible to see. He looked around with the flashlight, glancing behind him and then in front before twigs and branches snapped less than ten feet away. Adam pulled out his phone, slipping the Colt through his belt and dialing Sam as he shined the light in every direction he could.
"Adam?" Sam asked.
"The Compass is going crazy, Sam," Adam exclaimed over the wind. "I think I found him."
"I'll be right there," Sam promised as Adam glanced behind him but only caught a glimpse of white before the ground opened up beneath his feet and swallowed him within a split second.
A sinking feeling overwhelmed Adam as he was surrounded by darkness, and he got the worst flashback from three years earlier when Michael had been using his body as a vessel. It was all still a little muddy, since the presence of an Archangel inside him had actually felt a lot like being chained to the sun, but of what Adam could remember, Michael and Lucifer hadn't actually come to blows as it had been said they would. And when Sam had pulled Michael into the pit, Adam had gotten the worst feeling about where he was going and even with Sam there, Lucifer had been there too.
Four walls surrounded him without another second, and he smelled metal and oil nearby, opening his eyes to the darkness and feeling like he was in Hell all over again. He peered through the space around him, seeing a petite figure close in a white dress with dark hair brushed over her shoulders. She smiled at him as bright, white searing light enveloped the room, and all Adam could think was, ‘God, no, not again.'
"Adam."
It was the same voice as before — cold, ancient, demanding. Because of something in Adam's blood, he'd been able to look the Archangel in the face the first time, and he could do it now. But now was different.
"No," he said loudly, knowing what was needed and unwilling to give in a second time.
White hot heat licked Adam's face, and he shut his eyes tight even as he was pressed into the wall behind him harder than he'd ever been in his life. It felt like large, calloused hands were covering his face, but he refused to open his eyes.
"Adam," the voice persisted, like an old friend begging for submission to a long-standing agreement.
"No," Adam said, louder and angrier.
"I can save her, Adam."
Adam huffed loudly, feeling his skin on fire as the hands squeezed his cheeks and turned his face toward the bright, hot face less than two inches from his. The last time he'd been this close, he'd been the only other one in the room to occupy, like now, but this was like last time. It didn't matter what excuse he heard. It wasn't worth it to lose control of his own body.
"You shouldn't be selfish, Adam."
"After the bang-up job you did last time, save it!"
"She's innocent now, Adam. I want her to remain that way for as long as possible. Just like you do. Like Dean and Sam do. I swear my motives are pure."
"Empty promises!" Adam screamed. "Just like before. And don't you dare mention Sam or Dean. You can forget it."
"You don't want her to die, do you, Adam?"
Adam squeezed his eyes shut so tight tears streamed down his face. "Please," he whispered. "I can't."
"It'll only be for a short time. Long enough to keep her sisters from using the bathing blood. And then you can have your body back."
Adam huffed again, clenching his jaws and then his fists. It didn't matter how many excuses the bastard told him. He was going to be coerced into this again. Sam would find him, and he would save Mary and Dean and those kids the Demons took. Adam was sure of it.
"Adam, it's okay," he heard, swearing by everything he knew that it was Dean's voice.
But beyond the brilliant, hot white light, Adam could see nothing. How could Dean be talking to him now? Hadn't he been captured over six hours earlier?
The intense glare of the Archangel overwhelmed Adam slowly, until he had no choice but to open his eyes to make sure his skin and bones hadn't completely liquified. Bright, glimmering blue eyes gazed back at him, bending him to their will easily and invading his mind more harshly than before.
"Adam, baby, it's really okay," his mother's voice whispered.
The large, calloused hands changed, reminding Adam of his mother's hands as they caressed his forehead and left behind a warm, fuzzy feeling like when he'd been a little kid.
"You're being so brave. I'm so proud of you. I promise it'll all be okay. Have I ever lied to you, sweetie?"
Her voice wasn't in his head. It was right next to his ear, whispering and pleading, but Adam couldn't give in. He didn't want to be the weak one anymore. He had to prove to Dean and Sam that he could be useful — and not just because Michael had used him before. What was the Archangel even doing here?
"I'll make a deal with you. The moment you lay eyes on her and still want to refuse me, I'll release you. Like I said to Castiel, I do still have some pull with my father, and I won't need you ever again."
There was double meaning in his words as he still hovered ready for the moment Adam would give in. He was assuming Adam would give in, but more than that, he was contending that he could walk the Earth without a Human vessel. How could he do that?
"Well?"
It wasn't fair. How was Adam supposed to do this to Dean and Sam all over again? What if he took one look at Mary and gave in before two seconds could pass? How was he supposed to take control of his body from the Archangel now that if he hadn't been able to do it before?
Slowly, he lifted his eyes, staring into the searing heat without any fear or reservation.
Sacrificial Blood cont'd
In was after three in the afternoon when Adam and Sam pulled into New Hope, Minnesota, population 21,233. From most of the signs that led into town, it became obvious that it was a suburb of Minneapolis and had quite a few amenities nearby. But they bypassed all those things, pulling through the main part of town to the northern fringes of the neighborhood where the streets turned from asphalt back to concrete on the road of Highway 169 that took them north until the compass turned back to the east.
The last time Adam had been in Minnesota, his mother had been killed. He'd been attacked and eaten alive, which sounds disgusting no matter how you put it. And Heaven hadn't lasted long enough. It all felt unreal now — like it had been the most horrible, vivid, intense dream he'd ever had in his life, but this was his reality. His brothers were his reality. His mother was gone, and no amount of wishing or pleading was gonna bring her back. Adam had learned a long time ago to live in the here and the now. Dean and Sam had taught him that.
But there was something about this that made Adam feel like all of that had been a build up to something else. The Angels had used him to force Dean's hand, and Michael had used him to try ending the world all because of some stupid order. It had been a miracle for him to get out in the first place. But when Dean and Sam had reopened the cage to pull him out, he'd released Michael. They still weren't sure if Lucifer was still down there. Based on the general normalness of the world, they were all hoping he was. But now Adam wasn't so sure.
He couldn't completely explain it to Sam, but Adam knew he had to help now. He'd never offered before now, and neither had they. But since Cas had shown up at the house with Mary, all Adam could do was think he had to save her, and it didn't matter why he thought or felt that way anymore.
Sam got off the highway, getting on a side road as the compass needle skewed with the shake of the car. They drove through a tightly-packed neighborhood, garnering quite a few stares from parents getting home with their children, but Sam never slowed down, even when the needle directed them onto a path around the lake behind the neighborhood. At a "Y" in the road that went north or east, the needle drifted east, and Sam followed it diligently until the compass went east near another lake less than a mile from the previous, when the road went north.
Sam got out of the car, looking around for a few minutes, leaning into the car as Adam waited.
"Looks like we're walkin' from here," he said. "We should got what we can out of the trunk, and I'll lock it up."
Though Adam didn't feel right about leaving the car, he followed Sam's lead, meeting his older brother at the trunk as the elder scrounged for everything they would need. When Sam handed Adam the Colt, he took it uneasily, knowing its history and instantly feeling intimidated.
"Only shoot this when you've got a shot," Sam told him. "The Demons will more than likely be expecting us, and I can't worry about you along with Dean and Mary and those kids. Keep your eyes and ears open, and yell the instant you see or hear something wrong. Got it?"
Adam nodded silently, watching Sam strap on the duffle Dean usually carried before he closed to trunk and led the way in the brush around the car.
Even with the sun shining, it was still cold. Adam was guessing it was in the mid-thirties, and he could only hold his jacket around his chest so tight while still holding the compass. He kept his eyes on everything, from the soggy ground that indicated that it had rained or snowed recently to the bare, brown trees that loomed over their heads ominously. Adam remembered these things from his childhood, a blistering reminder that he was no longer a child and had the kind of life he would never wish on anyone. Even though he'd only been living like this a short time, he was already having trouble remembering what his old life had been like. And he hated being useless. Dean always told him he got that from their Dad. Adam didn't really care where he got it from. He just knew he didn't like feeling like he couldn't do anything.
"Sam," he said suddenly, "do you know what it feels like to have to do something? Like if you don't do it, something bad will happen."
Sam sighed, keeping his eyes on everything the same way Adam was. "Yeah, I do. In spades."
Adam looked at his older brother. "So what happened?"
Sam looked at him. "We're living it right now," he said seriously. But then he sighed and looked away. "The first time I . . . died, Dean couldn't let me stay that way. And we both had to live with the consequences for a long time, even after he went to hell and came back. Killing Lilith the first time was the worst mistake I ever made, and how here we are, trying to keep her from coming back."
"Do you think she'll try to bring Lucifer back?" Adam asked softly.
"Honestly, I don't know," Sam revealed. "All she may care about is getting revenge on me and Dean. She may want to make us pay for killing her — even if she knew she was going to die in the first place. All I know is that I can't let her use Mary to come back. Not like that. Mary deserves the chance at a normal childhood. Like the one you had. You both deserve a normal life. And I'm just sorry we can't give that to you right now."
Adam couldn't say it was okay, because it wasn't. But he knew how Sam was feeling. He knew Sam didn't want any of this, but he'd apologized for it so much that Adam was just tired of hearing it. He knew Sam was sorry. It didn't change anything.
Sunset was just after five-thirty, and Adam and Sam followed around following the compass needle the entire time as it directed them though leafless trees and muddy grass. They pulled out flashlights just as it began to get dark and cloudy, and when the "path" they were on forked, Sam decided to split up. Adam, again, didn't like that idea, but he didn't argue, gripping his flashlight in one hand and the Colt in the other.
"Call me if you see anything, and even if you don't call me in twenty minutes. Okay?" Sam pressed.
Adam nodded. "Okay," he agreed, watching Sam go left while he went right on the path that still went east along with the compass needle.
In the dimming light of day, it got colder a lot faster without much cloud cover, and Adam was immediately regretting now bringing a coat. But he pressed on, shining his light everywhere he could and listening as hard as he could to anything that was out of the ordinary. As far as wilderness and dank darkness, Minnesota was actually pretty ordinary, even after everything that had happened. But with the circumstances being what they were, nothing was ordinary about walking along a "path" with a flashlight and a gun in his hand in case something inhuman decided to pop out and surprise him like it was his birthday or something.
The wind picked up before Adam had a chance to call Sam, looking down at the compass to see it spinning so fast it was almost impossible to see. He looked around with the flashlight, glancing behind him and then in front before twigs and branches snapped less than ten feet away. Adam pulled out his phone, slipping the Colt through his belt and dialing Sam as he shined the light in every direction he could.
"Adam?" Sam asked.
"The Compass is going crazy, Sam," Adam exclaimed over the wind. "I think I found him."
"I'll be right there," Sam promised as Adam glanced behind him but only caught a glimpse of white before the ground opened up beneath his feet and swallowed him within a split second.
A sinking feeling overwhelmed Adam as he was surrounded by darkness, and he got the worst flashback from three years earlier when Michael had been using his body as a vessel. It was all still a little muddy, since the presence of an Archangel inside him had actually felt a lot like being chained to the sun, but of what Adam could remember, Michael and Lucifer hadn't actually come to blows as it had been said they would. And when Sam had pulled Michael into the pit, Adam had gotten the worst feeling about where he was going and even with Sam there, Lucifer had been there too.
Four walls surrounded him without another second, and he smelled metal and oil nearby, opening his eyes to the darkness and feeling like he was in Hell all over again. He peered through the space around him, seeing a petite figure close in a white dress with dark hair brushed over her shoulders. She smiled at him as bright, white searing light enveloped the room, and all Adam could think was, ‘God, no, not again.'
"Adam."
It was the same voice as before — cold, ancient, demanding. Because of something in Adam's blood, he'd been able to look the Archangel in the face the first time, and he could do it now. But now was different.
"No," he said loudly, knowing what was needed and unwilling to give in a second time.
White hot heat licked Adam's face, and he shut his eyes tight even as he was pressed into the wall behind him harder than he'd ever been in his life. It felt like large, calloused hands were covering his face, but he refused to open his eyes.
"Adam," the voice persisted, like an old friend begging for submission to a long-standing agreement.
"No," Adam said, louder and angrier.
"I can save her, Adam."
Adam huffed loudly, feeling his skin on fire as the hands squeezed his cheeks and turned his face toward the bright, hot face less than two inches from his. The last time he'd been this close, he'd been the only other one in the room to occupy, like now, but this was like last time. It didn't matter what excuse he heard. It wasn't worth it to lose control of his own body.
"You shouldn't be selfish, Adam."
"After the bang-up job you did last time, save it!"
"She's innocent now, Adam. I want her to remain that way for as long as possible. Just like you do. Like Dean and Sam do. I swear my motives are pure."
"Empty promises!" Adam screamed. "Just like before. And don't you dare mention Sam or Dean. You can forget it."
"You don't want her to die, do you, Adam?"
Adam squeezed his eyes shut so tight tears streamed down his face. "Please," he whispered. "I can't."
"It'll only be for a short time. Long enough to keep her sisters from using the bathing blood. And then you can have your body back."
Adam huffed again, clenching his jaws and then his fists. It didn't matter how many excuses the bastard told him. He was going to be coerced into this again. Sam would find him, and he would save Mary and Dean and those kids the Demons took. Adam was sure of it.
"Adam, it's okay," he heard, swearing by everything he knew that it was Dean's voice.
But beyond the brilliant, hot white light, Adam could see nothing. How could Dean be talking to him now? Hadn't he been captured over six hours earlier?
The intense glare of the Archangel overwhelmed Adam slowly, until he had no choice but to open his eyes to make sure his skin and bones hadn't completely liquified. Bright, glimmering blue eyes gazed back at him, bending him to their will easily and invading his mind more harshly than before.
"Adam, baby, it's really okay," his mother's voice whispered.
The large, calloused hands changed, reminding Adam of his mother's hands as they caressed his forehead and left behind a warm, fuzzy feeling like when he'd been a little kid.
"You're being so brave. I'm so proud of you. I promise it'll all be okay. Have I ever lied to you, sweetie?"
Her voice wasn't in his head. It was right next to his ear, whispering and pleading, but Adam couldn't give in. He didn't want to be the weak one anymore. He had to prove to Dean and Sam that he could be useful — and not just because Michael had used him before. What was the Archangel even doing here?
"I'll make a deal with you. The moment you lay eyes on her and still want to refuse me, I'll release you. Like I said to Castiel, I do still have some pull with my father, and I won't need you ever again."
There was double meaning in his words as he still hovered ready for the moment Adam would give in. He was assuming Adam would give in, but more than that, he was contending that he could walk the Earth without a Human vessel. How could he do that?
"Well?"
It wasn't fair. How was Adam supposed to do this to Dean and Sam all over again? What if he took one look at Mary and gave in before two seconds could pass? How was he supposed to take control of his body from the Archangel now that if he hadn't been able to do it before?
Slowly, he lifted his eyes, staring into the searing heat without any fear or reservation.
